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Donna Andersen

How to dump the sociopath

Suppose you realize that you’re in an unhealthy romantic relationship. Or, your instincts are telling you that the person in hot pursuit of you is bad news. How do you end the involvement?

When you’re romantically involved with reasonably normal individuals, you usually try to spare their feelings. You don’t come out and say that they’re boring, or needy, or oafish, even if that’s what you feel. You make up excuses. You tell them that you’re getting back with an old boyfriend or girlfriend, even if that’s a lie. You say you’re just not ready for a relationship right now, even if that’s also a lie.

Signs of a sociopath: Elizabeth McKeown admits cutting a woman in half in road rage incident

Elizabeth McKeown ( Greene County Jail)

Elizabeth McKeown, 46, is charged with murder after she intentionally drove into Barbara Foster, 57, of Springfield, Missouri, according to what she told police.

McKeown was stopped at a busy Springfield intersection, behind Foster. Frustrated that Foster wasn’t moving, McKeown accelerated her black Mustang into Foster’s car. Foster then got out of the car to inspect the damage and yelled at McKeown. As Foster returned to her vehicle, McKeown ran her over. The Washington Post reported:

3 steps to prevent a sociopath from taking advantage of your vulnerabilities

Image by Gustavo Verissimo

“Is it really a vulnerability to respond to somebody (apparently) liking and desiring you? Is that not just a basic human need that we all want to have fulfilled?”

The Lovefraud reader Dorabella asked these questions on a story that I posted a couple of weeks ago, The sociopath as your soul mate. They are great questions. The answers are: Yes, it’s a vulnerability to respond to someone desiring you, and yes, it’s a basic human need. So although these are vulnerabilities, they are also normal human qualities.

To be human is to have vulnerabilities.

“Ordinary men” do not shoot their wives and daughters — sociopaths do

Lance Hart of England shot his wife and daughter, and then himself.

Claire Hart, or Spalding, Lincolnshire, England, had just escaped her emotionally abusive and controlling husband. In July 2016, Claire’s grown sons, Luke and Ryan, packed up her and their 19-year-old sister, Charlotte, and moved them into a rented house.

Five days later, the controlling husband, Lance, shot Claire and Charlotte in the parking lot of a local sports center. Then he shot himself.

A Lovefraud reader just sent me a story about the tragedy that The Guardian newspaper published last year. You can read it here:

Find healing from the sociopath in the holiday spirit

Terry Kelly and Donna Andersen in front of the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Plaza, New York City.

For the first time in our 17 years together, my husband, Terry Kelly, and I, visited New York City during the holiday season. It was far more magical than I anticipated.

At the Birdland jazz club, we saw David and the Bombshells, a retro, 1930s-style band with three female singers (the Bombshells). Then, at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, we saw 20-foot Christmas tree surrounded by a gorgeous, 18th-century Nativity Creche. After that, we visited the Christmas tree Rockefeller Plaza — a 72-foot tall Norway spruce decorated with thousands of LED lights.

Signs of a sociopath: Man allegedly gets out of prison and immediately kills a woman

David Bohart (Tucson Police Department)

David James Bohart, 34, of Arizona, got out of prison on Monday, November 19, 2018. That same day, police in Tucson received a 911 call in which a man reported that he was just released from prison and had killed his girlfriend.

Bohart was arrested in a Tucson motel on suspicion of second-degree murder.

The victim, Marika L. Jones, 49, was found dead in a home. While searching the home, detectives found a Department of Corrections file box belonging to Bohart.

None of this looks good for Bohart.

This story gives multiple hints that Bohart may be a sociopath:

The sociopath as your soul mate

A few years ago, I read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, which was the #1 New York Times bestseller when it was published in 2007. Gilbert tells her story of supposedly having everything career, marriage, home yet feeling depressed and unhappy. She left it all, got a divorce, and then spent a year abroad to find herself. She ate her way through Italy, studied spiritual practice in India, and sought to balance pleasure and divinity in Indonesia.

With gratitude on Thanksgiving

Photo by Jack Moreh

Happy Thanksgiving to all Lovefraud readers! On this special day, I am grateful for:

  • All of you Lovefraud readers, who so generously share your stories, support and advice to new survivors who visit our site.
  • All of Lovefraud’s talented webinar instructors, who share their expertise and wisdom to help you overcome your challenges.
  • Our talented webmaster, Dave Rodrigues, who solves our technical problems. (If you tried to visit yesterday and Lovefraud was down, it is because we were under attack by multiple IP addresses. We have no idea why.)
Posted in: Donna Andersen

Why 14,347 donors gave more than $400,000 to a fake campaign to help a homeless vet

Kate McClure and Johnny Bobbitt in the photo from their GoFundMe campaign.

In this video from August, Megyn Kelly of Good Morning America interviews Katelyn McClure and her boyfriend, Michael D’Amico, about the more than $400,000 they raised for a homeless vet. Right there on national TV, they are lying.

In November 2017, according to McClure, she was driving on I-95 in Philadelphia when she ran out of gas in a bad neighborhood. She got out of her car, and was about to walk to get gas, when a homeless veteran who panhandled on the side of the road told her it wasn’t safe — she should stay in her car. Johnny Bobbitt walked to a gas station, and using his last 20 dollars, bought her gas so she could get home safely.

Signs of a sociopath: Ed Shin on trial for murdering his business partner

Ed Shin (Orange County Sheriff’s Dept)

A Lovefraud reader sent me a link about Edward Shin, 40, who is currently on trial in Orange County, California. He is charged with murdering his business partner, Chris Smith. News accounts of the case include clues that Shin may be a sociopath.

In June 2010, Smith was a 33-year-old entrepreneur and surfer with an oceanfront apartment, a serious girlfriend and a bright future. He and Shin were partners in a company called 800XChange, which focused on debt consolidation. They were making a lot of money.

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