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Donna Andersen

The sociopath as your soul mate

A few years ago, I read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, which was the #1 New York Times bestseller when it was published in 2007. Gilbert tells her story of supposedly having everything career, marriage, home yet feeling depressed and unhappy. She left it all, got a divorce, and then spent a year abroad to find herself. She ate her way through Italy, studied spiritual practice in India, and sought to balance pleasure and divinity in Indonesia.

While going through her divorce, Gilbert had a relationship with a man whom she calls “David.” This didn’t seem to be a sociopathic relationship, just normally dysfunctional. Although they broke up, Gilbert, from time to time, pined for David. Her … Read more

With gratitude on Thanksgiving

Photo by Jack Moreh

Happy Thanksgiving to all Lovefraud readers! On this special day, I am grateful for:

  • All of you Lovefraud readers, who so generously share your stories, support and advice to new survivors who visit our site.
  • All of Lovefraud’s talented webinar instructors, who share their expertise and wisdom to help you overcome your challenges.
  • Our talented webmaster, Dave Rodrigues, who solves our technical problems. (If you tried to visit yesterday and Lovefraud was down, it is because we were under attack by multiple IP addresses. We have no idea why.)
  • My wonderful husband, Terry Kelly, who offers wonderful support for me and all of Lovefraud. (He also made a killer Pumpkin Chiffon Mousse with Ginger
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Posted in: Donna Andersen

Why 14,347 donors gave more than $400,000 to a fake campaign to help a homeless vet

Kate McClure and Johnny Bobbitt in the photo from their GoFundMe campaign.

In this video from August, Megyn Kelly of Good Morning America interviews Katelyn McClure and her boyfriend, Michael D’Amico, about the more than $400,000 they raised for a homeless vet. Right there on national TV, they are lying.

In November 2017, according to McClure, she was driving on I-95 in Philadelphia when she ran out of gas in a bad neighborhood. She got out of her car, and was about to walk to get gas, when a homeless veteran who panhandled on the side of the road told her it wasn’t safe — she should stay in her car. Johnny Bobbitt walked to a gas station, … Read more

Signs of a sociopath: Ed Shin on trial for murdering his business partner

Ed Shin (Orange County Sheriff’s Dept)

A Lovefraud reader sent me a link about Edward Shin, 40, who is currently on trial in Orange County, California. He is charged with murdering his business partner, Chris Smith. News accounts of the case include clues that Shin may be a sociopath.

In June 2010, Smith was a 33-year-old entrepreneur and surfer with an oceanfront apartment, a serious girlfriend and a bright future. He and Shin were partners in a company called 800XChange, which focused on debt consolidation. They were making a lot of money.

Then, Smith’s family began receiving emails — he had always wanted to escape a mundane existence, and he had decided to cash in and go on … Read more

Here’s the absolutely best way to protect yourself from sociopaths

Yes, you can avoid letting a sociopath into your life. All you have to do is listen to your intuition.

Security expert Gavin deBecker, who wrote The Gift of Fear, explains that intuition evolved within us over the millennia for one reason: To protect us from predators. Sociopaths are predators, and our intuition will warn us about them.

The key is to pay attention.

Sometimes the warning is blatant — one woman told me about feeling instantly terrified when a man approached her. But instead of heeding her internal warning, she berated herself for being judgmental — after all, the man had done nothing to her. She talked to him; they became romantically involved; he was, in … Read more

Social worker charged in plot to hire hit man

So today I open up the newspaper and see that a local therapist, Diane Sylvia, 58, attempted to hire a hit man. She wanted a guy’s “pretty little face” bashed in. She also wanted his arm broken, so he could no longer work out.

Diane Sylvia is a licensed clinical social worker practicing in Somers Point, New Jersey. According to her title, she is also a certified domestic violence counselor.

One of Sylvia’s clients had belonged to a criminal gang. She asked him if he knew anyone who could do the job. The client notified the authorities, who then wanted him to introduce Sylvia to a hit man — except that it was really an undercover FBI agent.… Read more

How to dump the sociopath

How to dump the sociopathSuppose you realize that you’re in an unhealthy romantic relationship. Or, your instincts are telling you that the person in hot pursuit of you is bad news. How do you end the involvement?

When you’re romantically involved with reasonably normal individuals, you usually try to spare their feelings. You don’t come out and say that they’re boring, or needy, or oafish, even if that’s what you feel. You make up excuses. You tell them that you’re getting back with an old boyfriend or girlfriend, even if that’s a lie. You say you’re just not ready for a relationship right now, even if that’s also a lie.

In essence, when breaking up with an okay person who just isn’t … Read more

Utah track athlete shot by ex-boyfriend who lied about his name, age, and sex-offender status

Lauren McCluskey (University of Utah)

The story of University of Utah track athlete Lauren McCluskey, 21, is a tragedy from beginning to end.

She started dating Melvin S. Rowland in September. A month later, she found out who he really was — a 37-year old sex offender who had recently been paroled. When Lauren broke off their relationship, Rowland stalked her. Then, on October 22, he shot and killed her, leaving her body in a car on campus. He fled and later killed himself.

Here’s a timeline of the events in the extortion and shooting death of University of Utah student Lauren McCluskey, on SLTrib.com

When Lauren McCluskey first reported Rowland, the university police did not open an … Read more

Buy a 1-hour personal consultation, get all 3 Lovefraud books for FREE!

Good has come out of my disastrous marriage to a sociopath. With all I’ve learned about sociopaths, I now have the expertise to help you understand the insanity that you’re dealing with. It’s a gift, and I truly enjoy sharing it.

The sharing season is approaching. So from now through Nov. 21, if you schedule a 1-hour personal consultation, I’ll give you my three Lovefraud books for free.

  • Love Fraud — How marriage to a sociopath fulfilled my spiritual plan tells my personal story. It reads like a cross between a true crime novel and a spiritual journey.
  • Red Flags of Love Fraud — 10 signs you’re dating a sociopath is a self-help book which explains the sociopathic
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15 valuable lessons from ‘The Sociopath Next Door’

The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout, Ph.D., is a classic for describing sociopathic behavior. I’ve never written about it on Lovefraud. The reason is quite simple: I read the book when it was first published in early 2005, shortly before Lovefraud launched. I just finished reading it again.

I’ve learned a lot about sociopaths in the last 13 years, so this read was certainly a different experience. The first time I read the book, much of what Stout wrote was a revelation. Here are my observations from the second time around: Stout does a good job of describing sociopathic motivation, but her book fails to capture how dangerous and destructive these people are.

The reason, I … Read more

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