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Dangers of online dating

1. Worldwide, there are 1.8 billion Internet users. It is reasonable to assume that, as in the general population, 1% to 4% of them are sociopaths. That means there between 14 million and 72 million sociopaths online—all trolling for victims.

2. Sociopaths target lonely people. If you’re looking for a relationship online, you are advertising the fact that you’re lonely. You are setting yourself up to be exploited.

3. When filling out an online dating profile, you provide information about yourself and what you are looking for. Sociopaths take the information and pretend to be the person of your dreams. They use the information that you posted to seduce you.

4. Sociopaths typically register on multiple dating sites simultaneously. They keep baiting the hook until someone bites.

5. The Internet is anonymous. It is impossible to know for sure with whom you are corresponding. Some people post gorgeous photos in their profiles, which are actually photos of models stolen from elsewhere on the Internet.

6. Experts believe that 65% to 90% of human communication is nonverbal—facial expressions, gestures, body language, tone of voice. That means in communication via the web or e-mail, 65% to 90% of the meaning is missing. With so much information missing, people interpret a communication to mean what they want it to mean.

7. Because communicating over the Internet is anonymous, it creates a sense of safety. You feel like you can confess your hopes and dreams to a stranger.

8. Sociopaths say what their targets want to hear. Often, the sociopaths are lying. But humans can detect a lie only 53% of the time—the same as flipping a coin.

9. So here’s what happens when you look for romance online:

  • You provide information about yourself by filling out the dating profile.
  • You communicate with someone, but 65% to 90% of the meaning is missing.
  • You pour out your heart and soul, and it feels good.
  • The person responds, and you interpret everything to mean what you want it to mean.
  • You fall in love with your own fantasy.

Print out Lovefraud’s Dangers of Online Dating.


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romanticfool no more

I recommend this site so often I feel like I should get cards ;printed up with the web address on it, LOL. I may never be ready to date again, because of my disabilities and past experience I feel like I don’t have much to offer. Outside of my paranoia about matching up with another homicidal SP. I’m not even going to THINK about dating until I get my self confidence back. But I have to admit, flirting like crazy on line, when we all know it’s just flirting, does help my ego. I don’t give personal information about my age and don’t post a picture, originally because my ex was on the same social networks. The fantasy, when you know it’s a fantasy, is fun. What I’ve noticed is that the bad guys/gals can’t leave it there. They push hard for your information, must have your actual email, want a phone number, have to meet right away. Anyone in a hurry gets screened out. I need time to set up my boundries and see if they respect them.

The woman who talked me into trying an on line site met her husband that way. He’s a total love and a terrific guy. On the other hand, once I got to know her, she’s a real piece of work.

presseject

The internet is a great place for those with low self esteem to hang out… and those that prey upon them… Confession: I still tend to linger in some sites that offer social connecting, but let me tell you, after my S experience and all the good wisdom I learned here at LoveFraud…. I can now say I have 110% fully-functioning S radar WORKING!!!!

Yes the internet makes all these blind romantic miscalculations that much easier to make for all the important reasons listed in the article. But I can also tell you this that prior to having internet, years ago I can remember a few situations where I was just as easily “targeted” by S’s and P’s. I was just as likely back then to be drawn in (without knowing what I know now) as I would have on the internet until my recent “awakening!”

I still remain so grateful to have found this site two years ago. I still check in here from time to time, as it serves to remind me I have learned so much and gone through so many changes in how I handle my relationships, both personal and work related. These scammers and cheats and morally oblivious are out there for sure…. and I still have the kind of personality that attracts them… (I’m still sweet and kind and caring damn it – lol) but one thing I DON’t have (anymore) is the patience to sit still and be drawn into ANY kind of fantasy with them… not mine and not theirs either!!

I must say I really feel like I landed on the other side of the trauma from two years ago. Anyone reading and thinking how hopeless it feels from these kinds of encounters, I am here to tell you that change happens eventually when you work hard to get your dignity and soul back… and eventually there is light, and love, and laughter… stay strong… everyone!

xo PressEject

one/joy_step_at_a_time

presseject – ‘but one thing I DON’t have (anymore) is the patience to sit still and be drawn into ANY kind of fantasy with them” not mine and not theirs either!! ‘

TOWANDA!!!!

presseject

Towanda-rama!!!

Thanks! I feel free…

presseject

…free not just from some painful feelings but more importantly, free from the possibility of making the same kind of mistakes I did in the past. We are all lucky to have found a place like this to learn the art of healing and to grow again!

one/joy_step_at_a_time

presseject – doing the happy dance over here for you and for the same potential for all of us to get there!!!!

presseject

One Step @ a Time, I wish the same things too for all of us… This has been quite a journey to have gotten this far when I think back, but worth all the trouble actually. I have always been good at escaping reality, and all it took at one time was to throw a “S” into my pathway and the escape-seeker in me would easily take the bait. Now I know that you can’t get any nutrition from fantasy food… it is the worst kind of junk food.

I am still weeding my garden here btw, it isn’t just the S’s or P’s that used to be my weakness, it has also been other earthly diversions. My own personal list of diversions has been long, and I have begun to work on forgiving myself for letting myself get so lost. There comes a time when we have to lighten this load and forgive ourselves and the deep seated reasons in our past that caused us to seek our escapes. Otherwise, we remain susceptible I think, refusing to take responsibility for our lives and happiness. The struggle to gain back this sense of self is tremendous for some of us. The reason I am back here writing tonight has to do with a stage of recovery, a golden stage in which giving back the sense of hope I received here at LoveFraud in the early “crisis” days can now come full circle. This is all I can really offer here but maybe these words will be of help to someone, just like others with compassionate voices lifted me up here too… I am always most grateful.

PressEject (who really doesn’t think so much of the crazy S ordeal very much these days!)

Ox Drover

Dear Prress eject! Welcome home! Glad to see you again and to hear that you are doing well! I think we do owe a debt of gratitude to the Universe for what we received here at LF and that’s the beauty of it all! We can pass on the gift we have received!

hens

press eject – thanks for stopping by and sharing your new found wisdom and confidence, it is good to see others that know this place changed their lives if not saved them..i am with you on the not thinkin so much about the s ordeal anymore – in case your wonderin this is Henry and i am doing very well….thanks again for sharing with everyone, specially the peeps that come here in the same shape we were in two years ago…peace

Buttons

PressEject, bless your heart! Your healing path gives me hope! And, the “earthly diversions” list in my life is long, as well. Thank you for your uplifting comments. Doing the “hard” work ain’t easy, but it sure beats laying down in front of the trolley! BRIGHTEST blessings!!!!

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