Reply To: Broke up with narcissist and started no contact, having a really tough time



Dear Cindy,

When you are the victim of a smear campaign, it can be enraging to hear the things the sociopath is saying! It can seem like he has the power to destroy your life. But the sociopath only has as much power as you give him/her, and the truth always comes out in the end. They are not as smart as they think they are and their “power” comes from a very base level of control and manipulation. Any people who are truly your friends will see your behaviors and realize that his lies are just lies. And the rest need not be a big part of your life. In a situation like this, I look to the Obamas – Michelle and Barack – as role models in the way they handled the Trump smear tactics: “When they go low, we go high.” I don’t mean to get political. Whatever you think about the Obama’s, their statements and actions during the campaign were exemplary in how to deal with an extreme narcissist. Keep your spirits high, Cindy, and you will have other people in your life who are like that, too. Anyone who stoops to gossip about you is not worthy of your time and attention. Let them all go low – you can go high. Focus on your goals and dreams for your life, and don’t let the smear campaign bring you down. Your thoughts are very powerful – choose them wisely. My best to you.

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