Reply To: Failed at No Contact



Dear jay,

Yes, this was hard for me to believe too: ” It’s so hard to believe the person I have spent so many years with is intentionally evil.” I remember the first time I heard this — it was abusive men/people in general. It was in an abuse recovery group. The group leader said, “These people know EXACTLY what they are doing.” I was stunned. The one I loved was planning all these terrible things he was doing to me? In hindsight, it all makes sense now.

Another thing I’d like to offer — did you know that for addictions such as smoking, it often takes a person several tries — over the over — to break themselves of the addition? Some people can do it cold turkey, but few, I think, can do that. Each time they break off the habit, and then succumb again, they learn, they learn, they learn, till they “get it down” and are able to quit.

Send this to a friend