Reply To: Failed at No Contact



Dear Jaybird — one thing that I have learned is, when any partner is abusing you — at the very time or shortly after the particular incident ends, ask yourself, “Is this the way I want to live the REST OF MY LIFE?” Maybe that will help you see your future!!!!!

One of the hardest things for me, when I tried to leave, was that I was fearful of living alone. I rationalized, “Women and men are ‘supposed” to be together. That’s the way the world is!” I did not want to be like “those women” who had freed themselves of men. I thought “those women have no sex drive. I do.” On and on. Well, two things happened — one, I did live alone for a few years, and was pretty much okay. But I am a woman who needs a man in her life. Two, luckily for me now, I do not have sexual drive, for some reason. Very glad to be rid of it, as it pushed me into bad, bad situations. I have found a man my own age, who also is not interested in sex. We do not live together – another priority for me — he lives a 10 minute bus ride away. So we are great friends and do a lot of things together…lots in common.

If you are highly sexual, the advice at this forum will help you, I hope, find a partner w ho will not mistreat you. Addiction to a man is what we want to avoid. That’s what I got, when I was sexual.

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