Reply To: I don’t know how to respond or how to get away…



Dear wantingtobreakfree, Jan7 is a marvel — she has given you the straightout truth and facts about the situation you are. BE SURE THIS MAN CANNOT SEE THIS WEBSITE Clear your cache so that your site history is destroyed. If you are reading any books about abuse or leaving, don’t keep them in the house. Leave them at a highly trusted friend’s home. You can also likely find good books to read while you are in the public library. (That’s if Trump and Congress do not close all 123,000 public libraries in the United States, which is highly likely to pass Congress in the near future.)

6 years is a long time, agreed, but I was in one abusive relationship for 9 years and another one for 11 years. One of my closest friends was in one for 22 years, and the husband from back then has successfully turned her two grown sons against her. They treat her just like he did. She was a great mother, except that she and her then-husband did not agree how to raise the boys. She was fair, and disciplined. He was a lout, let the boys run wild, let their friends have the run of the house, including coming and going into the house without knocking or waiting to be let in.

If you marry this man, this is in your future. He will likely get you pregnant asap, so he REALLY has a hold over you! You would not easily be able to work or raise your child/ren. He could abuse the children or abuse you in front of them. If you were to end the marriage, he could kidnap the children and disappear with them into another state. This happens very frequently. They can even manipulate school personnel into letting him have the child right out of the school and take them away for good. Or hold you “hostage” by saying he will take the children away from you if you leave; paint you are an incompetent mother; get the court to remove them from your home; get the court to give custody to him. Sounds like fun for you? Then GET OUT. I don’t care how “embarrassing” is may be for you, to stop the marriage process a few days before that Big Day. It will be a lot worse than embarrassing if you stay. Grit your teeth and GET OUT NOW. You are IN DANGER.

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