Reply To: I can never forgive some people
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Synergy, thank you for your post and sharing your experience. Did you get to speak with the counselor who was kidnapped to see if she was able to forgive her captors? There is nothing you mentioned (unless you left something out?) that would indicate that she chose not to forgive her captor.
I’m truly sorry prayer did not help you. Are you at least able to forgive yourself for not being able to forgive your perpetrator? It’s really okay to be angry, and there is no secret formula. Maybe the most respectful gift you can give yourself is to let it be okay to be angry and maybe the timing isn’t right to change that.
I was speaking from direct experience of having a lifelong resentment toward my mother and finally forgiving her when I was 48. It was empowering to do it, and it was even more empowering to see that I COULD do it, and that forgiving had nothing to do with how she responded to me = it was a choice only I could make.