Reply To: I can never forgive some people
How to recognize and recover from sociopaths, psychopaths, narcissists and other exploiters › Forums › Lovefraud Community Forum – General › I can never forgive some people › Reply To: I can never forgive some people
Hi Synergy, when I was younger a few times I did not forgive. Now that I am educated on narcissist & sociopathic behavior & destruction, I realize that those few people that I did not forgive fell into high levels of narcissist maybe even sociopath.
So the lesson I learned: My gut alarm was going off & I listen to it back when I was younger by NOT forgiven & getting them out of my life quickly.
Of course you hear thru your life “you must forgive”, so I started to not listen to my gut alarm & guess what? I let a sociopath into my life even thought the first time I met him my gut alarm was SCREAMING. And I let him stay in my life for over 14 years!! It was a nightmare like everyone that deals with a sociopath. Now I regret ever listening to people when they make the comment “you need to forgive”.
What I know for sure is: forgive good people who made a mistake, NEVER forgive a sociopath EVER.
Why never forgive a sociopath? because in my mind you let your guard down by “forgiving them” and may end up letting them back in your world or you end up letting another one in your world.
REMEMBER you must set boundaries to stay safe in this world & survive in this world…like a Castle who has a defense system i.e. a wall made of stone, guards, solid large protective door etc. Have your same defense system!! Protect yourself. These protective gut instinct are in our DNA.
I’m not saying never let someone into your world but be wise & smart and listen to your gut alarm…when it goes off…assess the situation and if need be kick them out of your life. And DONT FEEL GUILTY FOR NOT LETTING THEM IN YOUR LIFE!!
Read up on setting boundaries on line & look into books at your local library on the subject.
Also Remember: 1 in 25 people mainly men are sociopaths
1 in 5 are narcissists (75\% men)
throw in all the other disorders & you can see why you must listen to your gut & always clear bad people out of your life. These manipulative evil people are everywhere blending in. They are like land minds that you must avoid.
I think it’s more important after sociopathic abuse, is to forgive YOURSELF for letting them in & not listening to your gut in the first place. This to me is letting go and moving on with your life.
Obviously if say a good honest friend had to cancel a important event with you, you should not hold a grudge. Or if you can talk it out with someone & express your feelings & they make changes of how they treat you then let go.
My 2 cents worth ðŸ˜Š