Reply To: Am I being dramatic?



EmmaLucy, he sounds to me like a classic sociopath. I’m sorry sorry for what you have gone through with him. The fact that he had a gf while he was with you was the first deception and the first red flag. His putting her down is the second red flag. They all do this to justify their cheating and get their newest victims to feel sorry for them. The one I dated did the same thing. He claimed he was separated from his wife and living separately, on the verge of getting divorced. Turns out they were living together with no plans to divorce. The whole thing had been a lie and a very convincing one. He never told me the truth – I learned it from his platoon sergeant in the army. Everything that came out of his mouth was a lie, and he was SO convincing, as I’m sure your guy is too.

The problem with sociopaths is they are capable of sounding so sincere and convincing, it’s easy to see why you took him back repeatedly after his indiscretions. Normal people do not behave like that sociopaths do. Your feelings of jealousy and deep betrayal, especially after having his child, are completely understandable. But realize that he does not “love” this new girl. He is incapable of loving anyone, and she will end up discarded and betrayed just like you. This is what they do. She is just a novelty, and eventually she will be old hat too. He may try to come back to you, play the two of you against each other, or cheat with a variety of others. It’s straight out of the sociopath play book. And he will probably tell the newest victim that you are the reason he cheats. It’s called the “smear campaign.” He did it with his last girlfriend, and he’s probably doing it with you. It’s a game and it’s all about power. As hard as it is to be a single mom with no paternal support, you are better off cutting him out of your life and your baby’s life as quickly as possible. He will be nothing but trouble. He will try to use the child as a pawn as a way to play power games. If you can get him to release custody to you in exchange for not having to pay child support, this is the best way out. Then you don’t have to have anything to do with this creep again. You are NOT crazy and you are NOT dramatic. You are being manipulated by a sociopath. Get out as quickly as you can.

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