Reply To: Hi I'm new and need help

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Dear Sweetness, What is that saying about…if someone who doesn’t appreciate you walks out, it’s like the trash is taking itself out.

First of all, he DID cheat on your for a few years. Therefore, he is capable of it, and can/will do it again if the mood strikes him. Second, cheating isn’t the only form of disrespect. Third, it is one of many red flags that he does not take any responsibility. Fourth, what kind of person walks out for weeks or a month and then comes back? Even if other things were good, this is not a way to build trust or make your partner feel safe – by constantly disappearing. You cannot have a healthy nurturing relationship like this. This man is obviously incapable of a mature relationship, regardless of the label. He sounds emotionally stunted. Next time he walks out, change the locks. Or better yet, you be the one to walk out once and for all. Your life will improve in leaps and bounds once the chaos ends. Best wishes to you, dear.

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