Reply To: Feeling so empty

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I just had a brief work involvement with a contractor who put the “con” in “contractor”. I feel that empty feeling, too, and I didn’t even date him! First, the most important thing is don’t poke at the hornet’s nest. In other words, don’t try to reach out to her or to play games with her, get back at her, etc., etc. This will keep you engaged, and it’s very toxic. Just walk away. If there’s business stuff you have to do regarding her, do it from a distance in a businesslike manner. Second, there is only one thing you can do, and that is to feel the pain and emptiness. Don’t fight it – just feel it. It is there for a reason, and it is trying to tell you something. There is wisdom in the pain of how you let yourself get hooked to begin with. Just be gentle with yourself and give yourself a wide berth for the process you are going through. I’m going through it again for the first time in 10 years, but I have much more awareness this time, so it’s not as devastating. It’s part of your life path to go through this. If it wasn’t her, it would be someone else who would trigger these feelings. So just experience them and see where you come out on the other side. It will be a much better and more grounded place guaranteed. It’s okay to feel broken and to be a mess right now. It will get better.

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