Reply To: His new victim has just contacted me via Facebook

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He sounds pretty sick; and he was dishonest to you about his activities and his feelings for you. Sadly, they are often successful at deceiving society. It’s frustrating when people think they are such wonderful people. In my experience, though, there’s usually not anything those of us who know the truth can do to convince others what the spath is really up to and what his character is like. The best we can do for ourselves is to be sure we know someone well in a variety of situations before trusting them with our love and other resources. The best we can do for others is to support them and answer any questions about the spath if they become aware of his disorder.

You now know that he is not a good person, he’s into various perversions, he’s a pathological liar, and he’s a predatory manipulator in relationships, that results in harm to his target. You know enough to be certain you are better off not interacting with him ever again. It is likely that your recovery will be more complete and quicker if you protect yourself from anything and anyone to do with him. For the sake of your emotional and psychological well being, consider not having interactions with anyone else about him, nor seeing anything about him on line.

Unless there is a very important reason for allowing him to see your FB page, consider making your profile and anything you post on FB private and only visible to your closest friends who would not have contact with him. If he’s stalking you on FB there is a reason, and the reason is likely to be harmful to you. The more he knows about you the easier it would be for him to create a fake FB or dating profile and target you again in some weird way. He may desire to harm you just because he wants to ‘win’ in his mind, if he feels that you have outed him and that you see through his mask.

He really doesn’t deserve to know anything about you. You are a good person with valuable attributes that are appropriately shared in interactions with your friends and family of good character who care about your well being. He doesn’t belong in your world.

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