Reply To: she thinks she's the drama queen

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Freedomformydaughter, Just know he is painting this “fantastic opportunity for them” in her mind with regards to moving to this remote island. He has her under his brain washing spell, so she thinks this is a great idea. That is until reality sets in when she steps off the plane and his mask of evil drops once more.

Here are just a few suggestions for your daughter prior to leaving, these things are not only for her safety because she is with an abuser, but also just for any traveler traveling the world to a remote area.

1. Have a round trip Airline refundable/changeable ticket

These type of tickets are more expensive, but it will give her peace of mind that she has an exit out if he becomes abusive towards her or she is not happy being so isolated. He may only want to buy a one way ticket to save money now but then you daughter is stuck on this island if his behavior becomes abusive.

2. Have her open her own safety deposit box at a large chain bank on that island, where she can put her airline ticket, copy of her passport & drivers license and also have her put emergency money in, a few hundred dollars cash or more, so that she can have a place to stay & food until she can get a set on the next flight out if she is being abused. Have her do this without her boyfriend knowing!!

3. Prior to her leaving, have her with your husband & you, look at your country’s Embassy location map on that island and/or State Department. IF there is no Embassy or State Department on that Island then locate the closest to that Island. Review your country’s Embassy & State Department website regarding traveling!! There sites are very informative for travels. Just google your country’s name with state department travel and also for the embassy.

4. Send a letter or email to the Embassy and/or State Department stating on such & such a date we will be arriving on the island of ____. My contact number is such & such. We are planning to stay until such & such date. There is info on the Embassy & State Department website for this procedure. This way if there is some type of emergency on the island i.e. volcano eruption, flooding etc the state department will notify her and also for her to have a contact incase she is in danger. The state department & Embassy are there to help travelers!! So make sure she knows she should use them if there is any kind of emergency.


5. Make a copy of her passport & leave it at YOUR home and airline ticket copy. If her passport is stolen or he refuses to give it to her if she wants to leave…you have a copy that can be faxed to the Embassy or State Department & or the copy in her bank safety deposit box she will be able to get an emergency passport from your country’s Embassy or the State Department can help facilitate this. (my passport was stolen in a foreign country & I was able to have my copy faxed to the Embassy & they issues a emergency passport).

She needs to know that her pass port & airline ticket are the most important things she will take with her on this trip. It is her life line out of a remote area. Have her do these things without her abusive boyfriend knowing because if he does know he will manipulate her to take these things away.

6. Have her program the following numbers into her phone:

1. Closest (Your Country’s) State Department & Embassy number and Address to that island.

2. If your country’s does not have a State Department or Embassy on that island check to see if another country does just as a back up safety location for her to go to if she needs help out. Program that number & their address into her phone.

3. Bank phone number that her safety deposit is in.

4. Airline phone number that she is traveling on to that remote island, most likely not a major carrier just a small feeder airline. Plus have her program the Major Carrier Airline she travels out of your county.

7. Prior to her leaving have her & you/your husband search for internet cafes that your daughter can use their computer for a small fee to keep in contact with you. Set a day of the week that she will always send you an update i.e. every Tuesday & Thursday or everyday. This why you have some peace of mind but more importantly you have contact with your daughter should something happen then you will know to send out the troops (so to speak) on that remote island.

Keep in mind that on most remote islands internet coverage is not wide spread but usually there are several internet cafes.

8. For you get her landlords phone number & email or hotel managers name & phone number. This way you have a person that you can contact if there is an emergency or need to find her.

9. Search to see if there are any “Expat” groups or clubs (other foreign travelers who live on the island) on this remote island, where your daughter can meet people from her country or other English speaking countries (or what ever your country’s language is). This way she is not isolated, she can make friends & most importantly she has a safety net with people that speak her language to help her out of the island if he is abusive.

10. If this island country has a very sticked religious domination. Know that some religions of the world will not protect a woman being abused by her husband or bf. So this is another reason for her to make connections with Expat (Foreign travelers) as the police may just send her back home with her abuser.

11. Have her purchase a phone “sim” card for that region. They can be found in phone stores or sometimes just a grocery store. She can change out her country sim card for this foreign sim card so that she can talk with people she meets on the island for a minimal fee but most importantly she will be book an airline ticket out.

12. Visit the tourism department website for that remote island.

13. Have her purchase a electronic plug converter…if the island has different electrical sockets then your country then she will need a converter to charge her phone.

When you talk to her about the above list make it sound matter of fact. Hey, I was just reviewing the Embassy website travelers info & this is what the suggest. You dont want to dictate to her what she needs to do but more as a concern for her. Remember her bf dictates to her so she is not going to put up with it from others.

You most likely will not be able to talk her out of this trip. But, you can help her have an exit plan out of this remote island by helping her stay safe ahead of the trip.

Read the book Freedom of Mind by Steven Hassan. Donna has written a post about his book just do a search up at the top right corner. This book will give you the education of how to open your daughters mind up from her bf’s brain washing.

Hugs to you.

  • This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Jan7.
  • This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Jan7.
  • This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Jan7.
  • This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Jan7.

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