Reply To: Red Flag Online Dating Profile



Hi T41,

The online profile only seemed superficial to me at first, mentioning Tiffany and David Yurman, but then when he could not even spell the name of the wine that he said was his favorite (and it is a VERY expensive wine) I said, hmmm.

Most straight men do not give a hoot about expensive jewelry, maybe watches, but not Tiffany’s and not Yurman, no matter how much money they have. They might know these are expensive and desirable brands to many women, and might even pony up for these as gifts for their wives/girlfriends, but they do not brag about this generosity for the most part, because they are not actively seeking gold diggers. Nor do wealthy men expect women to buy expensive jewelry for them, in my experience.

What I believe he was naively trying to do is mirror what he believes rich women want, and say he expects “classy” women to be into these things in the hope of being seen as part of that wealthy in-circle. Instead, to me, he stuck out like a sore thumb.

The wealthiest people I know tend to try to hide the fact that they are rich. You usually know they have money because of where they live, went to school, what type of career they have, and the clothes that they wear, not because they come out telling you, “I am filthy rich,” nor do they (usually) suggest it.

Another thing that gave him away was his syntax, grammar, and spelling. While there are certainly very wealthy people with mediocre/no education, most have a way with language that speaks volumes about their status. This guy clearly has no class, and as I said to Donna, it was especially belied by his photos. He looked more like someone you might see at a dive bar, and those are great fun, but if you go to places like that then you probably would not come off as a pretentious poseur.

It might have been easier to spot the psychopath who targeted me if I had seen his online dating profile. Instead, I met him in person, and he had already snowed all the people around him to believe he was a very wealthy entrepreneur. It was not hard to believe, because everyone believed the myth, and he was throwing around lots of cash, at first.

Well, it turns out he stole it, to the tune of over a million dollars, from more that a few women like me. Sigh. I am just glad that this person is out of my life, and I hope headed for prison, but we’ll see, and either way, I will be just fine. I know that you will, too.

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