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Reply To: Red Flag Online Dating Profile

#45658

thirdtimelucky
Participant

The online profile looks scarily similar to one posted by my SP ex. He was “enjoying travel, fine food and wine and weekends away”. Though he forgot to mention he had an adult daughter (found out 3 months later) and that was married (said he was divorced…but forgot the remarried bit).

For the next 3 weeks he mirrored me on line. When we had a lunch date he was 30 min late (but said I was early). I did not have a “wow” I expected from our online chats (after a few emails he felt like a soul mate, same experiences, likes, etc). But I did not listen and carried on with it for the next 4 years and only broke it off because I hired a PI and found out this man lied to me about everything. Starting with his place and date of birth!!! Despite having 2 relatively normal “admirers” at the time (introduced by mutual friends), both were long divorced, with grown up children and financially stable with good jobs. But of course they did not feel like “soulmates”, there was no desire to rip their clothes off so I chose excitement over common sense. Lesson learnt.

From personal experience of online dating, I would try and look at an alternatives such as a Meet Up in your area (e.g. trying new restaurants if food is your thing or art outings, dancing, languages, etc). It is a lot harder to hide face to face. Depending if you are a sporty person, golf courses (there are some affordable public ones), tennis courts, gyms etc are better ways to meet people.

Online dating can work if you are after something strictly casual, but even then one needs to be careful.


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