Reply To: New here and hopeing for an end

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I believe the sex thing serves 2 purposes for them. First, SPs have a higher level of testosterone, females as well, and getting sex is one of their biggest goals along with power, money, and control. And they are good at it because they have sex often. Since they don’t feel the way you and I do, they’ve learned to judge our reaction to certain acts and use those against us by giving and withholding those things we like best.
My SPs ultimate goal was to get his hooks in me so that i could give him the “cover” he needed in his professional life. He was 40something, unmarried, unattached, had a well decorated and spotlessly clean house and people assumed he was gay. That didn’t bode well working with a bunch of good Ole boys. Rather than say… hey I’m a confirmed Batchelor who gets all the women I ever wanted…he picked me to be his cover. I like sex and he figured that out very early in the relationship and used it to hook me. I was addicted to him. I was also cheated on and belittled and lied to and depressed.
At this point in my life, I’d like a minivan. In time i could probably get that minivan to do donuts and take corners on two wheels.
Work on getting you mind and body and spirit to a place of peace, then see if you’re still interested in the fast car. Thats just instant gratification and addiction. My wish for your future happiness is that you decide to take your time cultivating what could be great sex eventually, because it will be with a loving person who isn’t out to hurt or use you.

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