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Reply To: Were they sociopaths?Should I be afraid?

#46276

claudette
Participant

slimone and marinapearl your replies gave me more validation (the same thing happened by mikederek’s reply of course).
marinapearl, they were absolutely energy vampires!!!They made me feel drained of all my energy!!!I stopped going to the gym, I delayed doctor appointments (and because of this I face now a health issue that prevents me of going 2-3 days of holiday), I couldn’t write any poems (which I used to do), all my creativity kind of died and hasn’t return until now!!!I couldn’t even drink a cup of coffee on Sunday mornings feeling relaxed which was my favourite habit and I still cannot do it!!!God, when am I going to find those simple but so essential things for me? Am I going to find pleasure in all of these ever again?
I had won an award for a poem at a national literary contest and she insisted that I gave it to her to read it at the time when we weren’t close!!I didn’t want it, I gave it to her though and she never ever told me one single comment about it!!Even though she pressured me to give it to her at a time when I hadn’t showed it to my own mother!Why, why did she want the copy of my poem and never told me a single thing about it? I feel that even my writing ability and the strength I used to find in literature was violated!
One more important clue that I forgot to mention: she didn’t tell to anybody at all at work (40 colleagues and the boss higher than her) that we were spending any time together! I called her once for a big (and immoral in a sense) favour they had asked me (to talk to the judge), she were out with a colleague (in order to manipulate her, I knew it, they had told me) and she didn’t even mention my name when she answered the phone!!!And of course there was no “thank you”! Another time a colleague called her at a Sunday when we were having lunch in my hometown (where they kept coming at the weekends “out of the blue”, informed me the last minute and pressured me to go see them), she told her that she had come for a trip with her husband there but she didn’t mention she was with me! Again! Why do you thing she did that? This clue made me suspicious about their motives, intentions or plans about me.
I will try to use the gray rock method but my true self is the total oposite!And I had showed my true self at work. Do you think she could guess I’m pretending?
I want so badly this PTSD to end…Thank you again for your replies, all the three of you. God bless you…


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