lf2

Reply To: Could it all have been just an illusion of mine?

#47259

David Mc Dermott MD
Participant

sbff8,

Yes it is normal to have contradictory emotions in such a situation. When you are involved with a manipulator they literally change your personality. You have different thoughts, emotions, behaviors and even a different way of seeing the world. This is why friends and family often say of the victims that they are not themselves anymore.

This false personality is trained to believe the manipulator, to look after the manipulator and put the wants and needs of the manipulator first. This is why you feel sorry for him. It’s also why daisy199o and other victims have difficulty believing that their ‘beloved’ was actually abusing them. This false personality is also made to be dependent on the manipulator and this makes no contact so difficult initially.

While your false personality is upset for him, your real personality recognizes what a nasty person he is and this causes problems because your thoughts don’t line up with your feelings, or you have contradictory feelings at the same time (for example, hate and caring, anger and pity).

Learning about how specifically they manipulated you helps to get rid of the false personality, the imposed beliefs, ideas, behaviors and feelings.


Send this to a friend