“Hoarders” show unknowingly features a sex offender

The reality TV show Hoarders, aired on A&E, failed to do a background check on “Patrick Donovan Flanagan O’Shannahan,” who they portrayed as an eccentric old guy who liked to collect dolls. In fact, he had multiple aliases and a long rap sheet, including a fraud, assault and a sex offense.

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66 Comments on "“Hoarders” show unknowingly features a sex offender"

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Linette, Donna posts topics that have a general interest to us, where we run with them is up to us, the twists and turns are how we make them personal. I have been here a very short time, however I am getting so much from everyone here. Everyone here has made my life better.

I was on a divorce site but no one there could really relate. I was the ‘outsider’. No such judgments here. No apologies necessary. A place to vent, share, and grow.

I totally relate to your feeling uncomfortable about your husband using your place of worship,to see you,to stalk you.Because that is what these guys are doing!!! I never realized it before replying to your earlier post!

Before I left my husband,he didn’t go to services;he listened on the phone line.And then,he was so “appreciative” of that provision that he would fall asleep!He had to listen on the phone line in the nursing home,until a nurse and her son agreed to drop him off and pick him up afterward.

The way he made use of our phone line by listening in at the nursing home,was actually a form of stalking,now that I think about it.He would listen for my voice,and if he didn’t hear it,he was immediately on the phone to one of our daughters to find out if I was sick!And he started commenting on lessons,whereas he had never done so before(never really cared to do so)~I knew then he was making his presence known!Anything to take away my peace!

The easiest solution would be to go to a different congregation~until he found out which one.Although he is in a nursing home and couldn’t follow,he knows alot of people,and he’d set somebody up who doesn’t know the situation,to let him know how I’m doing!However,there is a POWER greater than him,and it’s on MY side!

Thanks Blossom! It’s just so wrong but as you said, HE is on our side! Rough night last night, dealing subconsiously with all of this order of protection running out, him showing up etc. I know it’s a bit of a “regression” from the peace I felt while the order was in place. But I don’t like it! Tired of letting him rent space in my mind.

Linette I read somewhere that the only people we should let rent space in our heads are those who are good tenants! Serve him his eviction notice next time he disrupts your sleep.

If only that would work Tea Light! If only! I am getting better. Today was good. I am learning to really appreciate the days that I feel “free”.:)

Very interesting stuff, but I think the case is simply that there are more hoarders and psychopaths than anyone ever suspected. I think the case is not that there is any known or even suspected link between hoarding and psychopathy or pedophila for that matter. I happen to know a rich gay psthological pedofile but that does not equate with all gays are rich or psychopaths or pedofiles. I do however suspect strongly that all pedofiles are psychopaths.

Yes, I absolutely agree that all pedophiles are psychopaths. They should all be sent to one place together…a freezing cold place somewhere and never released.

My ex-husband who is the hoarder is not a spath as far as I am believing. I believe he is Borderline Personality Disorder. He is capable of understanding that and is getting counseling. I could never live around him, though. Strangely, living next door to a spath as I do for rent money is different. It has become easier for me to detach from him by stepping back and remembering what he IS no matter how he tries to ACT. The spath is actually neat to the point he throws things away…often things I have loaned him without even thinking or caring about it. That just caused me to stop loaning him my things.

But, my ex-husband, the hoarder, truly is capable of empathy and friendship most of the time if I don’t live with him. I feel sorry for him and I hope he get the right kind of counseling with the knowledge I’ve discovered by reading an article here that compared sociopaths to people with borderline PD. Now, I just let him have his “fits” and stay away from him until he can calm himself down. He truly feels bad and hopefully will improve his behaviors. The spath never feels bad. He only acts like he does. I can tell the difference now.

Every day,EVERY MOMENT that you can push him out of your mind,to think of something peaceful,something good,is a victory for you~~and a victory against evil!

Public admission. My Father was a spath. I was not certain of this until i fell in love with one and ended up here with major heartbreak. I could not help but see all of “this” LF info-edu… in My Father. He was a hoarder too. Major. My siblings and I almost considered calling the Opray Winfrey show, LOL to help us with the house when he passed away. It was that bad. It took months to undo. Total strangers helped. It was a shock…we had no idea. In the spirit of adding to info for all, he was also a pedophile. There seem to be many disorders that are linked together.


Blue, I’m really glad you felt you could share this with us. I recently posted some background to my involvement with the narcopath, alcoholism and violence in the home, a molesting uncle. I felt lighter, and I truly hope you do too. You’ve been through so much Blue. Keep strong, keep faith in your future. Peace and love.

Hi Tea Light n Blossom,

How do I get him out of my head? Even though I am 9 months out, 2 months NC, he is still in my thoughts???!!! Do I force a peaceful visual? How does he keep ending up in my head? Is there a way to speed up removal of spath from our thoughts? Lobotomy?? LOL
I know I should have looked for article on this, but I saw reference above and I read articles in archives before. He is still there!!! Exasperating!


Bluemosaic: Thank you for sharing your struggles. I am sorry to hear about your father’s behaviors that hurt you.

This is a pretty safe place and Donna is very open to contact from any of us if we notice something that isn’t safe.

As far as getting spaths out of my head, I have to say that I don’t see it happening and I am glad. One spath who took me for an emotional ride, helped ruin my career, and just seemed to want to prove he could have what he didn’t deserve, is DEAD. He killed himself last year. I had not heard from him or seen him in a decade. It still caused me distress. I don’t think I will ever get him out of my head. It can be very frustrating.

However, I have come to look at it as a good reminder of what I don’t want to ever have going on in my life again. He was so very charming and attractive and all of that…pretending to be everything I would want. But, he was an illusion. He and the spath I “handle” now are necessary for me to seek education about them so I never miss the red flags again. Once I now know the red flags, I will know that it is time to go. No one can take our education about any subject away from us. As I read articles and sharings here from others, I can’t unlearn that. It doesn’t matter if a past spath is in my head…even a dead one. Him being in my head is a great reminder of what I will never fall for again.

Blue I guess the underlying reason why they stay in our heads disrupting our peace of mind varies considerably. Some if us are genuinely heartbroken and greiving the lost ideal. That just takes time to process. Some of us (this is my “hook”) are finding it difficult to let’s it go before feeling we really have a handle on the disorder and its associated behaviour. That takes time also, a lot if reading up. Some of us are going through legal proceedings that require preparedness and continued contact. If you are suffering heartbreak and grief Blue then there us no magic wand, but do your griefstages reading and know which stages youhave passed through and which seem to recur. Anger? Denial? Depression? It’s not a linear process, as you know, so you may go through certain aspects of the process more than once. As painful as this us, it’s necessary for you, and it’s better you are conscious and respectful if your grief than that you deny ominimise it and have it return with a vengeance down the path. You’ll be ok. Be good to Blue, Blue!

Thx Tea Light,
I am deeply saddened b/c I thought he was the love of my life. I lost the only man I thought I ever really loved deeply. I have really lost that delusion, but the greif has been alot slower. There are no ties between us. So, the only reason he is in my thoughts, I really thought he was it for me. I saw him as the best man I had ever loved, until he wasn’t.
I have had some depression lately. I think I am going throught the grief slow, due to a re-addiction. If I can lay “it” down, I think it will help release the greif and pain without leaving traces.
Thx for the clarification.


Good point Fightforwhatsright, We have the knowledge that this awful experience imbedded. I was so open with people, before he came along. I now feel suspicious of any man who looks at me. I have shut down several, just based on one comment I did not like. I would not date regardless, but at this point, I do not even entertain friendly exchange. I used to have a reputation as overly kind and friendly, I can imagine my new rep. as being shut down and rather harsh. So be it.
He may be in my head, but he is out of my life. I am sure I will never be so vulnerable to a spath again, mine was adoring and charming in the beginning too. I now see that as a red flag all loud and flaming.


I call it “my wall.”

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