By | December 17, 2006 5 Comments

Wishing you strength, recovery and love for the New Year

The end of the year is a time of reflection, and I am in awe of the strength of the human spirit, as evidenced by everyone who has posted on the Lovefraud Blog.

You have come face to face with evil. You have survived. You have recovered, or are taking steps to do so.

I am very grateful for all the heartfelt and insightful comments being posted to the Lovefraud Blog. One thing I’ve noticed is that comments are often added to stories that have been online for awhile. So if you have some time, you might want to look at past articles and read the comments. There are some particularly thoughtful comments on these articles:

Telling our stories of being targeted by sociopaths

Child victims of sociopathic parents

Fear and loathing when the sociopath returns

One woman’s experience of romantic manipulation

Sociopaths, children and the legal system

Additionally, a reader has recently added a story to The sociopath and the Easter eggs.

Lovefraud Blog will resume in January

I particularly want to thank M.L. Gallagher and Dr. Liane Leedom for their tremendous contributions. You have really expanded the service that Lovefraud provides to our readers.

The Lovefraud Blog authors will be taking time off to enjoy the holidays. Posting will resume the first week in January.

I wish all Lovefraud readers strength, recovery and love for the New Year. Yes, I said love. Know that it is possible to reclaim yourself after the devastation of a sociopath and find love again. Lovefraud is here to help you.

Posted in: Donna Andersen

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will be okay

Thank you Donna, and everyone here. Because of my nightmare with my sociopath, I lost my job, and health insurance. I have not been able to get any mental health help. So needless to say, this website, and all of you, have been instrumental in getting me through this!! On behalf of my kids, and myself. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!!! God Bless & Happy Holidays.

will be okay

Actually, I shouldn’t have worded it “so needless to say”. That’s way too much of an understatement!! I should have said: WITHOUT A DOUBT you’ve all been instrumental in getting me through this!! Thanks again.


I have been struck by one of these Sociopath / Con Artists. I have been going through a living hell the last 4 1/2 months.
I am an American man living in the Midwest and a little over two years ago I tried the Internet Dating thing. I wrote to some American gals and some wrote to me. All of a sudden I receive a wink from a Chinese Woman from China. I thought can’t you read 30 miles af my home city not 9,000. She was very attractive. A few days later on saw her online on this sight and I responded to her to chat. No response from her. The next day I have an e-mail from her introducing Herself. I wrote back to her and after a few e-mails we exchanged personal e-mail addys. We started to write everyday to each other. She even sent me a present to my work place. We continued the writing to each other and I thought this very cool writing her in China. I started to have strong emotional feelings for this lady though I never met her. Then one day there was a coal mining disaster in her home town in NE China and I did not receive an e-mail from her that day. I was really bummed out. I started to think wait a minute you do not know this person or have met her yet. You better stop now before this gets out of hand. I thought you are falling love with E-MAILS! What is wrong with you! The next day I received her e-mail and she told me that she was no where near the Coal mining accident and that her Computer broke down the day before. I was totally relieved by reading her e-mail. That when I decided I had to meet this Mandarin Beauty. In May of 2005 I went to China to meet this lady. I had fallen in love with her. This was so not me to do something like this. There she was with her friends and family. We hit it off right away. I had the best time of my life the two weeks I was with her in China. I asked to her to Marry me on the 4th day there and she said yes. When I came home I started the 129-F Visa process to bring her here to the US. It is a very long process and it can take over a year in some cases to be approved for a visa to the US. Before I left China she asked me if I could help her financially with her English classes. I started to send her money from the States. We just seem to grow stronger everyday while we where apart waiting for the Visa. I returned back to visit her right after Christmas and again spent two weeks with her.
Finally she arrived here in Mid March. We where so happy together. The long wait was over and now we are going to face the journey of life together as Husband and Wife. How I loved Thee. Up to this time I had sent her about $4,500 for her English classes and living expense and the necessary transportation costs to the American Consulate in Guangzhou, China and the to the USA. 10 months about $450 a month not bad. With the American 129-F Visa you must get married in 90 days or she would have to leave the US. We married in the end of May. After a month or so here in the USA she is offered a job in a Chinese Restaurant as a part time hostess. She accepts and I thought this is good for her to do something with her spare time. Plus we always use the money for other things. Her 1st paycheck she receives she informs me that she has a debt to pay back in China of $7,500 and must be paid back in a year. $7,500 is equivalent to $60,000 USD in China. I knew nothing of this debt. I thought why in World didn’t she tell me of this debt. I did not ask if she had debt so I thought well you have to live with it know. She was going to pay it back out of her earning she said.
After we where married I found out that she was no accountant but a cook. I also found out that she never owned her Apartment like she told me. I became concerned of these lies.
When she arrived her in the US she lost a bag with most of her clothes in it. We filed a claim with Delta and the never did find the bag. So we filed a claim for reimbursement for the valuables. During this time I had to spend over $600 to refurbish her wardrobe. We finally received the Insurance check for her lost baggage and she wanted to apply it to her debt back in China along with the money she saved and send it back to China. She contributed almost nothing to our household from her earnings. I told her about all the money we had to spend replacing her clothing. She blew up at me and screamed my money my money. She than left the house and went to a girlfriends house and took the insurance money out of the checking account. She spent the night over there with her friend. I went and picked her up the next afternoon and we tried to patch things up. She told me that she sent the money back to China. There is no point dwelling on it the money is gone now.
A few days later I ask her for the receipt of the money she wired back to China. She would not give it to me. The next day she started to pack up and left me. She went back to her girlfriends home. Two days later she filed a False Domestic Violence Charge against me so she can get her Green card under the abuse clause. I never laid a hand on my wife except to show my love and affection for her. She hired a real nasty attorney and now I am fighting tooth and nail to save my home and assets from her. She did not care if I would be ruined financially or have a criminal record. It did not matter to her all the money I spent in bringing her to the USA and raising her standard of living 5 fold. I found out that she planned to do this to me when she was still living in China waiting on her visa.

will be okay

Wow Tyler, I feel for you. It’s amazing how being lonely and wanting to be loved, can open us up to such evil. Especially since wanting to be loved is such a normal thing. It’s still hard for me to believe, that something so beautiful can become so ugly. Good luck to you!!


My Divorce is final from this person. She received nothing no assets or Spousal support. Zero. I never had to pay her attorney fees or her court filing fees. I was not found guilty of anything, no domestic violence charge. We divorced on the grounds of Incompatibilty. Not enough to get a Green Card for abuse from Immigration. She did not show up in court. I beleive the main reason was that she was afraid of all the evidence I had to disclose in to her Attorney. As well as they did not wish to have a public record of all the fraud and lies she did to me. Her Attorney did and represented her in the divorce agreement.
She is exploiting and living off an Elderly Man in his 70s now and she will propbably drain this man dry of his finances before he knows it.
The terrible thing about Li was that she has so much natural talent in her to become so successful here in the US. The big PX as a friend of mine calls the US. I have a solid sales back round and together we could have a wonderful life based on love, honesty and integrity together. I really fell in love with her.

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