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Revisions and enhancements to Lovefraud.com

Most new visitors find Lovefraud by Googling either “sociopath” or “sociopath symptoms,” and clicking on links in the search results to our main website, Lovefraud.com.

We’ve just completed a comprehensive content revision for Lovefraud.com, which hadn’t been done in a couple of years. We’ve updated information, fixed broken links, and, based on input from readers, shifted emphasis. Here are some of the changes:

• Equal play for female sociopaths. Although the original content mentioned a few times that sociopaths were both male and female, the overall tone focused on male perpetrators, and guys who’d been victimized by women rightfully complained. The imbalance has been corrected.

• Larger estimates of the number of sociopaths. In discussing the prevalence of sociopathy in the general population, Lovefraud originally quoted Dr. Robert Hare’s figures. Dr. Hare estimates that 1% of the population of North America may be psychopaths, which is the term he uses (see below). Other medical professionals feel that 4% of the population are sociopaths, which is, of course, a much bigger number. We sure don’t know who is right, so Lovefraud.com now takes both views into account.

• Confusion in terminology. Several articles on this blog address the issue of whether these predators should be called sociopaths, psychopaths, people with antisocial personality disorder, or creeps. The professionals disagree, and we can’t solve the problem. All Lovefraud can do is present a fuller description of the disagreement, and ask the experts to come to a decision.

• Categories of articles in the Lovefraud Blog. As of today, there are 348 posts in the Lovefraud Blog, and more than 14,000 comments. Many people are not aware of the wealth of information in the articles and the comments contributed by Lovefraud bloggers. This new page highlights the 12 categories of the articles, such as “Explaining the sociopath” and “Healing from a sociopath,” so you can find the type of information you’re looking for.

Coming soon

Two other major enhancements to Lovefraud.com are also underway. One is a Lovefraud Store, where we will soon offer books by our authors.

The other is the Lovefraud Professional Resources Guide. Many, many people have asked Lovefraud to refer therapists, lawyers and other providers who can help them deal with the aftermath of life with a sociopath. So far, we’ve been unable to offer any assistance. But we are now in the process of developing a database of knowledgeable providers. Once the structure is complete, we will ask all Lovefraud readers to refer any professionals you know who can provide competent service to victims of sociopaths.

Since Lovefraud launched in July 2005, it has evolved into a solid repository of information about sociopaths, and a supportive community of healing for all of us who have been victimized by these predators. Your contributions have made Lovefraud the wonderful resource that it is. Thank you so much.

Posted in: Donna Andersen

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69 Comments on "Revisions and enhancements to Lovefraud.com"

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Way to go Lovefraud!

Your site is invaluable to anyone who has been touched by the depravity of a sociopath. It is only through understanding that we can hope to move forward, as the general ethics, morality and rules of society don’t apply to the SPN’s.

Until we are armed with the info of what they are about, we try in vain to fix, to be loyal, to help, to rationalize and explain the inexplainable.

Major relationship trauma, divorce and so on is always difficult, but when dealing with a SPN we are truly alone, as others cannot fathom the total lack of feeling or empathy of a P, and are often also blinded by their charm and social skills etc.

It has bee only here at this site, that I have found the support I so badly needed in trying to untangle the web of lies that was my life.

Not a day goes by where insights from others on this blog and elsewhere on the site do not help me to stay strong and focused, knowing that one day my life will be free of the abuse that comes with engaging in life with a PSN.

I cannot imagine how many people you have literally “saved” and you all have my thanks and best wishes for the work you are doing.

I think the reason it’s so difficult to get past our relationships with them is because they don’t wind down the way “normal” relationships wind down. “They” the anti-socials end the relationship abruptly with everyone … so we aren’t warned before hand that it’s ending. There is no talking about it, deciding it to end. It just ends for their reasons … which is irrational even to try to understand their rationality. They started the relationship before they even meet us … and they end it the same way, not having anything to do with us.

That’s the hook, that’s the confusion, that’s the pain … there is no closure with them prior tor them making their next move … and on down the road they go … sailing on the surface of life … never delving deep into the depths of emotions.

Just a thought if anyone wants to elaborate on this.

Peace.

We get put into a painful spin (lies are always painful) because we are trying to work with lies instead of truth. Believing another would naturally just tell us truth.

They can’t or won’t speak/live truth for their selfishness and greed are clouding the way.

Truth is always truth and lies are always lies. Lies come out first and cloud or block truth… so you have to have patience to sit back to and wait to see TRUTH surface … and it always surfaces … truth always comes out on top even when it’s blocked and bogged down by lies.

Awesome! Do you think the professionals will actually be able to agree on a name for them??? Once that happens, then people have to take notice that these people really exist beyond the movies.

Good for people affected by female S’s too! I am a female affected by a female– a rare breed. Not a lesbian, just dealing with a new husband’s ex-wife… LOL. Although I’m sure there are those as well.

I love this website. And I gotta say thank you to Oxy for the chinese good luck/bad luck parable. It not only changed my viewpoint, but has my husbands’ as well. And just at the perfect time.

I just posted an article from 1991 on Stockhom Syndrome and victims of antisocials (psychos)…it’s an interesting read.
http://holywatersalt.blogspot.com

Thanks you for the update. I am wondering when we get a forum. 🙂

So will LF take positions- say based on Dr. Leedom’s stats from book -on prevalance on antisocials?

I think LF (real in-the-know professioansl in the psycho field) need to produce position papers, an association.

The misinformation out there is frightening.

I would like to make a suggestion about articles and finding them. Your dividing them into “subjects” is great, and also into “authors” for the major contributors, but if there was a way to just have an “alphabetical” list so that you could scroll down a list of all the articles quickly, I think that might be nice and help us in finding a particular article that those of us with CRS could utilize. LOL

My guess is that wouldn’t be too difficult to do but I am a computer dummie so it might be diffiuclt, but just a suggestion.

This site is wonderful, Donna, and I think has provided a TRULY safe haven here for us, and I want to personally and profusely tell you just how much I for one apreciate it. This site has been very educational and validating for me and I think has provided a large part of my own healing and I have also observed the healing changes in other posters who have come here. God bless you Donna, and Dr. Leedom and the others who have made this site possible.

IN addition to your store,, I would also like to see a “book review” section where other books by other authors are given “short reviews” so that we would have other resources available as well.

Or a “book of the week” review, where someone sends in an article about a book they have read, review it, and then bloggers who have also read it could comment on the review as well. A book that I might think was great, someone else might “shoot holes” in it and that’s okay. But it would give people a wider selection of books and a bit of a review so they could decide if they wantted to buy it.

Some of the REALLY great books on ps are located used on Amazon.com, E bay and Half.com (owned by e bay) for pennies, and even with shipping are only $3-5 bucks.

Maybe a list of shelters in different areas (at least of the US) I know that would be an upkeep hassle, but different ones of us could list the shelters in our area and be responsible for keeping that list updated and with bloggers from all over the US (and England) a blogger from that area that needed to go somewhere would be able to find the information easily. I would bet there are enough “reagular” readers who would be willing to do that for their city or state. I know I would like to contribute to your efforts here any way I can as a “thank you” for what you have done for me and others, so I would bet the farm there are others out there who would also be willing to “help” with some “chores” or immprovements. Big HUGS Donna!

The bookstore sounds really great — I like the idea of having those resources available here rather than hunting on Amazon. When I was trying to find books about the topic, it took forever (kept searching under “fraud”).

I also like the idea of the database of possible counselors who deal specifically with people who’ve had encounters with sociopaths or who’ve been defrauded. I’ve lost a lot of people in my life to illness and disease, but that didn’t cause me to lose faith in other humans. This is very different. I don’t think that my counselor was able to fully understand how bereft I am of trust now.

It’s Me :0~

I know from first hand exp. that athorities have very little simpathy for the Gay Man! I did 5 days in jail because I feard for my life! My mother said before I was arrested, your the one who’s going to Jail ! after over 4000.00 us dollars. I got a letter from the state ; no Information . What?

My injuction followed ; He could not be found. he went to the adjecent county!

my point is the resources A1 idea Approved :)~

I also want to say even after 6 years Whew! I really did’nt have it that bad ! ;)~ just $60,000.00 thats pennys compared to what you others have spent on It!

Love Peace hope and Joy to all

P.S. Psycoworld go but do not post just read and leave

This is disturbbing yet informative if any sight needs surveilance it’s there

Love Jere

Thanks very much Donna for that explination Okay thanks again, I just haven’t obviously seen everything on this site that is already available. DUH! LOL

Thanks too, Donna, for all your support and for the tremendous amount of work you must do to keep this site afloat. I know I’ve said THANK YOU before, but each day I think God for your work and wisdom in getting this site up and running. The good that it has done for me and others here Iknow will ripple for GENERATIONS to come.

thanks donna, for all your hard work. what you have done here with LF is nothing less than life-saving.

any opportunity for a real-time chat? sometimes we — i — feel desperate for immediate feedback when in a crisis. it would also be nice to know who is on, when.

Thank you so much for this wonderful site, Donna! It has helped me so much this past year. Just knowing that I am not the only one going through this is comforting.

Wini – my ex-P ended the relationship so abruptly, I didn’t even see it coming, at all. When I asked why he didn’t tell me about his plans sooner or why he didn’t tell me he never wanted to be married to me, he said something like, “well, I’m telling you now”. All the years before that I had no idea of what he was doing or thinking. “I had a fantasy of what marriage was going to be like”, he said, “and this wasn’t it”. Hmm, you’d think he would have known, as I was his second wife.

“They started the relationship before they even meet us ” and they end it the same way, not having anything to do with us.”… That is a really good thought. It never mattered to him who I was; he knew what his plans were before he even met me. Just like his current victim. I liken what he did to me as taking a piece of paper, crumpling it up, and throwing it in the garbage, never to be thought of again. That’s exactly what he did to me. I don’t think he’s spend more than an hour or two even thinking of me this past year. That’s just who they are. Sad, but true.

There is no closure. I was left hanging wondering what happened, and he was already happily making plans for the next woman to move in. The saddest thing of it all for me is that I planned out our future together… the kids graduating from hs, our future beach house, retirement together travelling, and all the while he never even considered spending all this time with me. Sad really. Truly sad.

All most free

Come and sit here next to me so you can have what I have I will share the love I have with you and all who need me feel the warmth of my closeness the soft tone in my words and know that the Truth is You are Free now ! not that it does’nt hurt and you are still realling in the Lie and because of It’s game! You just need to know that you and IT are not the same!

*WOW* HuH?
I love it when that happens Love Jere

Donna

What about an It recovery Room
A chat room like environment where there is a rolling dialog and like was allready said we could see each other as far as who’s watching and who’s reading and whos blogging !

By the way YOU ARE MY HERO
Tears Of Joy Jere

Is’nt It amazing? how It dances around the law ?

The smart ones anyway. mine was dumb as a box of rocks, but oh so beautiful on the outside, It reflected True male beauty but on the inside was rot and emptyness and longing, hopelessness,depravity,envy,greed,anger,madness!

Mine is so textbook! maybe that is why I am recovering so quickly. I feel lucky because if my It was as bright as some of yours , would I ever have gotten free?

I also wana tell you what happened !

I learned all this within the last two weeks! I watched opra she had a guest on who’s son had killed his mother and brother . The story was not about the Killer but about his father who had forgiven him in order to heal from this tragic horrible ordeal! The Psyciatrist said that the son was a Narrsistic Sociopath and that It was *learned behavior!* It was interviewed in prision , it was cold , stoic, you could see it had no nothing! It is condemed to die! I think that It should not die, that it should be studdied and analized and allowed to rot the rest of It’s days on earth with not a hint of ever smelling freedom! But thats just me! 🙂 oh definately Maxsecurity -solitary -allowed to bother no one!

so Back to my It! My It had been in a treatment center for AA and I guess they treat or try to treat for other drugs we also knew that it needed medication for self control Prozac. This is all payed for by us tax payers and donations. It stayed seven months.

Ok so I call It. Thinking It’s in treatment. I find out It’s lose again. *I tell It what It is !* Guess what? There is no denial? Ok so Now I tell it that us is done! after six years of all my support I’m Finnished Guess what it say’s

F*** You!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I told you textbook! did’nt I :)~

Now I know the game ! did I tell you I was Good At chess?
well when it said F*** YOU I hung up the phone and turned off the phone. It called back three times that night

reveling in my victory I was tempted to call and try to explain .I know I know NC.

So Now I had Dumb A** Angered by my Newly rediscovered selfworth!

IT returns my call to say don’t call

Ok so your thinkin Kewl right? Nope It calls 12 times in two days ! Oops now I had listened to the first two messages and IT was still calling. so I picked up . It can’t hardly keep a thought for more than a few and a conversation is realy difficult for it. So I basicly played the game . I asked It if it listened, aaaaaaaaaaaa so I have only so much time/$ for phone Bull ****. So I explain this and It is to contact me through It’s cell via FUNKYSEXYCOOL a web enabled cell phone dateing site

Now like I said he aint the Brightest Craon in the box but you can still buy It a happy meal ! Right ! 🙂

It has very little to text seeing as it would be required to spell everything Now! 🙂
I am so Bad !!!!!!!

Well I text that I want to come over and give IT a massage. IT texts back something like thats what happens when ya fall for a SUPERSTAR. And then NOTHING and I havent heard from IT since !

And Thanks TO YOU ALL I DONT CARE

LOVE PEACE FREEDOM

jere

This is my first, but hopefully not my last post.

I was involved with a sociopath three years ago who showed some, but not all of her true colors when I was 25 3 years ago while we dated. After I broke up, she started stalking and harassing me after I tried to stay friends with her (big mistake!) Eventually, I lost over $3000 from her and her friend’s extortion.

I also run a blog about sexual assault and domestic violence victims who are legal adults.

When it comes to terminology when dealing with sociopaths, I believe that for sociopaths who deal with sexually manipulative relationships, that they can actually be seen as adult analogues of child and teen molesters. Unlike kids and teens, psychological coercion of vulnerable adults into sex is legal, though immoral.

I believe that sociopaths who sexually entrap adults should be considered to be adult sexual abusers, who target adults as victims in the same ways and the same manners that pedophiles target kids. Pedophiles groom minors for victimization – sociopaths groom adults the same way. WHatever characteristic the pedophile uses to ensnare and abuse kids, the sexual sociopath uses on his adult victims.

Brian
What is your profession? Jere and welcome

I work as a civil engineer in Milwaukee.

Thanks if your still reading

When I read your statement You obviously know whats happenning these are the same ITS just different paths of destructions! like mental warfare. First I thought maybe a byproduct of breeding for Wariors but It’s not breeding ITS just simple EVIL! love Jere

What is the smile face and who puts it there?

Ok I am going to tear myself away from this pooter I have been obbsseedd by this Knowledge and love and GOOD PEOPLE ! I love you all

But it is my conviction that this IT/psy/ soc? this heartless ,loveless,no concience! EVIL is not a syndrome It’s a deman/demon That psycical body that persons mind is Possesed by a demon it really does’nt matter why! So If you want to Organize a Exorsism Count me OUT!

This is never going to be resolved except individually for you and us and how ever we may have of educating the masses . Don’t expect to be warmly recieved Love Jere

Indigoblue. Explore the thinking behind good and evil. Find out everything you can. The Universe has been created in a dual mode – there must be a reason for that. x

x= ?

x= IT the demonic, evil , the devil, LUCIFER , The HIGHEST of all Angels , The LORD of MUSIC ! THE KING and RULLER of HELL and the lake of fire for which there is no return nither redemption! THe socio/psy/nar/pdd/ BLA-Bla_ Bla-bla -bla bla- bla-BLA. yup that would be It ! percisly,exactly,you hit the hammer/nail.

Meaning no disrespect ; looks like poop
smells like poop
feels like poop
Taste this :)~
what it taste like Drog
Drog say AaaaA yep Taste like
POOP.
Good thing we no step in
Hug! :)~

Far Side Gary Larson
Rest in Peace
Love Jere

Dear Indigo, I knew you had to be a Gary Larson FAN!!! He’s my hero!

Beverly, dear! Welcome back, have missed your smiling “typing!

Welcome Brian, feel free to chime in any time. Glad you are here but sorry you have to be here. That’s the “catch 22” of it, this is a wonderful place for those of us who need it, but needing to be here is the pits.

Jere go to OxD and washes her Feet in warm pure! mineral water

Hi Oxy, Missed you too, but I know you have been very supportive, as I have ‘looked’ in now and again, although, I dont understand everything that is written, but I guess I have been unacquainted with all that has been happening. Hope you are well Oxy. xxx

Dear Bev,

Yea, been busy around LF and lots of new peeps which is good. I’m doing great in fact! I have decided to even celebrate the holidays this year. My son C is coming home for 10 days over Xmas/new years so dug out the holiday decorations (been years since I even put up a tree) but I feel so Good that my son D was going to call my psychiatrist and tell her she mis diagnosed me that I was bi-polar and was now manic! LOL I told him it has been so many years since he has seen me truly happy that he just forgot what I’m like when I’m not depressed! LOL

Which is wonderful cause all the little things that happen every day that are irritating just roll off my back now instead of sending me into the abyss! It is amazing what a difference being happy makes in your life. Don’t sweat the small stuff, and you can remember that it’s all small stuff!

Weather’s been great to work outside so son D and I hve been doing that and have finished completely one project and have made progress on the multitude of others, enough that we can at least see some progress, so that is gratifying.

Also making some big plans for the next couple of years that I hope will come to fruition and give the rest of my life some “purpose” as well.

Hope you are well and all things peaceful! Jane popped in a day or two ago! Miss her too when she doesn’t come by regularly! Though I do know there are times to move on too, but your words of wisdom to the newbies is always wonderful and supportive and missed when you aren’t here. (((hugs))) and you are still always in my prayers.

Indigo,

Henry told me that if he ever went straight he wanted to marry me, but you know, HE never offered to wash my feet in pure mineral water, so I may have to throw him over for you! LOL Thanks!

Thanks for all the updates on this site which I believe will only expand and improve both the members and visitors experience here at LF. LF has grow from a simple ideal to help and warn others of the danger when someone gets involved with a person who isn’t concern and/or cares about the victims they leave behind. But I believe LF also has grew even more then one might have contemplated which only shows the great about of work and foresight put into this site. I for one would love to see a paperback book with LoveFraud’s.com logo as the title. This book could contain information about this site and the many stories taken from this site. In short the book would write it self. I believe this site will be successful even more so in the future as it aids and helps others to understand not only the sociopaths and the many dangers associated with having a relationships albeit a lover family member or business partner with one but also will help with understanding and forgiveness to themselves as well. I see LF as a small fire which has grow into a large burning forest firer burning away any and all doubts confusion and lies of the sociopaths leaving only the bear truth behind exposing those whom has in fact no conscience and/or care for the great hurt and pain they have cause to love ones family members and friends. So with that stated beware cheaters and liars for we are LEGEND….

Update:

“great about of work”

great amount of work 🙂

“LEGEND”

Sorry again should be:

“LEGION”

Good lesson to be learned never write a blog with a head cold..LOL

🙂

hahahahahahah James

does the smiley mean that you are here now?

Iam just a beginner and I lack the knowledge of this site I am reading all but I have so much to share and give I am obbsssseeeedd with this knowledge and the GOOD people who I feel are here

I responded to your querry of the love of Poetry and I too have been filled as never before with words of wisdom not my own words but of healing and understanding and humble acknowledgment that I am at 46 only really waking up from the spell of this demon ! love Jere

Dear Indigo,

KNOWLEDGE=POWER and learning all you can about the Ps, the way they operate, an dhow they are all so much alike in so many ways, it is like they operate out of the “Psychopath’s Play Book” Some are male and some female, some old, some young, some straight some gay, the thing is though, that they all will give themselves away one way or another “the red flags”—so if you learn the “Play book” you can spot them.

All of US have in common from the “victim’s play book”—we don’t have solid boundaries. One of the first things we have to do is to acknowledge that we played a part by ALLOWING them to repeatedly abuse us. So when we heal from the abuse, we also learn to set boundaries, and to in the process become stronger, wiser, and much much less vulnerable to anyone who would abuse us.

We must not let the experience embitter us, or make us hate filled or anger filled, even though that hate and anger is part of the healing process, but we don’t want that to become permanent with us. We must learn to appreciate the blessings that we have, the goodness that is us, and know that we DESERVE better. Even if we did allow them to abuse us because we loved them, we don’t deserve what they did, and we are not at “fault” or “to blame” for what they did.

Just because a dog doesn’t bite you after the first or even second or 100th kick doesn’t mean that you have a right to kick the dog. We let them kick us, but that doesn’t mean they had the right to do it, or that we deserved the kicks.

There is so much wonderful information on this site, and It may seem overwhelming to read and read, but it will validate your story, help you realize that they are what they are, and whatever you want to call them IT, sociopath, psychopath, Antisocial personality disorder, devil, satan, it doesn’t matter they ARE THE LIE.

OxD Thank you

Too let you in to my world

I have a fire in the back yard in the dark

Your place is set and your chair is covered with a cusion right next to mine so for us to speak of the wonders of this day and the joy of only being alive and to be with each other!

I set a place for Jesus ! you never know when or how he will come and sit with us and say I am with you allways ! peace jere

I don’t know Oxy, I think psychos are fatalists at heart … always having some negative soundtrack playing in the background of their brains …

Just a guess … hence, all the game playing instead of being straight up and telling you the truth.

Peace.

I need to relate this I know you all allready know it

My it delighted in punishing me with rap music ! the constant beet

The constant repetitive beet or annoing lyric over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again

did anyone else experience this behavior? jere

Dear Indigo,

It was only when I got ALL of the Ps out of my family and my life that I have been able to experience true joy, true spirituality and true PEACE. I am NC withh all the Ps and their enablers, their “psychopaths by proxy” that wound you in the name of “protecting” the Psychopaths from the consequences of their behaviors.

When we get these people out of our HEADS as well as out of our lives we don’t experience the pain of more and more repeated injuries.

Sometimes you can’t get the people out of your life physically, maybe they live next door to you, or you work with them, etc. but you can get them out of your head, out of your “circle of trust” so that you no longer expect them to behave as “normal” humans do, so you aren’t devestated when they act like what they are.

I’ve set the “bar” pretty high for someone to be in my “circle of trust” because it is a very special place that I no longr intend to allow anyone who is a P or other user-type person to invade, and if I do make a mistake and let one in, I will toss them the FIRST time they lie to me, or use or abuse me in any way. I may still interact with this person, but I will never trust them again.

I’m fortunate I am retired so I dont’ have to interact with the ones at work any more, and my “crazy” neighbor moved off after the community realized what he had done to me and literally shunned him (I live in a small rural area where everyone knows everyone) I have gone NC with the rest of the family members who are Ps, so I am P-FREE, and experiencing JOY in my life about things I never even truly saw before. The JOY of watching a kitten chase a grasshopper and bound in for the “kill”–of watching the wildflowers outside my bedroom window (Yep, they are still there believe it or not even with winter coming on!) Of looking out over my “domain” and feeling safe here again. Of looking up at the night sky and seeing stars and thanking God for these many many blessings, and for literally leading me “through the valley of the shadow of death, and makes me to lie down in green pastures.” Peace and Joy!

i have a question for anyone. when did you ever feel like dating again? how long was it before you felt like you were ready to date?

im not even close to wanted to date anyone, but i have this fear. i can see the emotional damage done to me since the S. i see how different i am. im scared ill never get past this fear. i dont want to date another loser. i dont want to end up with someone who cant love someone else, or is afarid to love. im so much happier since my break up but even today i still cant image bringing someone into my life, it still seems odd to be dating someone else. does anyone know that feeling? like im used to being single now but at the same time i was with the x for so long it still seems odd to ever be with someone else.

blondie I don’t think we can plan on a time to start dating. It’s good that you are ok with being single. It is good that you know about user’s and abuser’s now. Just don’t think too much about when – you never know when you just mite meet a nice guy – it mite happen today~~~!! I think we have analyzed the crap out of our past relationship. Take the wisdom you now have and just go with it – who knows!!!!! Hope the next one is a keeper – but if’n he ain’t – kick his ass too the curb and keep on keepin on.

Did youall deleet all my Posts :)~ love jere

blondie: Good question … even though I know longer think about dating … but that’s just me. I was never keen on it in the first place, never mind what my EX did to me. Funny, he was the only guy I ever dated that I wasn’t the stronger personality in the relationship (this time around I thought we were equals). I kept telling all my friends how healthy he was, how we never argued … well, I argued about some stuff, he never did … he’d always tell me when I COOLED off, we’d talk about it. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was … fining a man who was healthier than I was. LOL.

And the rest is history ….

I know there are real people out there … my parents, aunts/uncles proved it. They all had great relationships … not only being married couples, but best friends. My sister-in-law’s parents are a great match, so are her aunts and uncles.

I think, at least in my experience in dating, the jerks approach us first and take over our space … therefore, the real people who want to approach us stand back … they know our space has been taken up for that evening … whether it’s out in a public meetings, bars, restaurants etc.

I know that if I scan the room and look for the guys standing on the outside of the center of the room, seem to be the “normal” folks. People who have to be in the center of any room … are the N’s … and I automatically check them off my list.

Like I stated, I haven’t even thought about dating again … my guy friends take me out … just to get me out. So I have fun with them … all platonic friends that I’ve had in my life for years.

If I do date again, I won’t go any further in the relationship until I talk with his sister(s), female cousin(s), female friends, co-workers, ex dates and ex wife and he better have a slew of old buddies going back to grade school that are happily married. Then the guy better suggest that we have a fun date and not something in a bar. Even if it were a bar, I’d watch him secretly to see if he’s eyeing everyone in the place.

Peace.

Indigoblue: How can anyone miss your posts? LOL. You always keep the conversations interesting.

How are you this fine evening?

Peace.

hey Indigoblue there is no delete button sometimes I wish there was cause I have said some crazy things here but I still feel welcome……..WINI i think being single is the best way to go……..

Hey Henry: Yup, I think you are right. Besides … my rollercoaster was a real doosie.

How’s things with you Henry? How’s the 3 puppies? Hey, I got some cute e-mails regarding people dressing their pets in Halloween costumes. There was this little mouse, dressed up as mighty mouse … standing in front of a mouse trap with the cheese stuck in the middle. The look on his face was “should I, or shouldn’t I go for it”?

Funny, funny, funny.

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