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Book reviews

People who can ruin your life, and how to deal with them

5 types of people who can ruin your lifeBOOK REVIEW: 5 Types of people who can ruin your life – Identifying and dealing with narcissists, sociopaths and other high-conflict personalities, by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Review by Donna Andersen

Yes, millions of people with serious personality disorders have the potential to ruin your life. 5 Types of people who can ruin your life, by Bill Eddy, is the first book I’ve seen that draws attention to the multiple personality disorders that spell trouble for interpersonal relationships.

Bill Eddy is a lawyer and social worker who leads the High Conflict Institute, an organization which educates people about high-conflict personalities and high-conflict disputes. His previous book, Splitting: Protecting yourself while divorcing someone with borderline or narcissistic personality … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Donna Andersen

Legal Abuse Syndrome: the result of facing sociopaths in court

Legal Abuse SyndromeBook review — Legal Abuse Syndrome: A Preventable Public Health Problem, by Dr. Karin Huffer

Review by Donna Andersen

You’re traumatized by your experience with a sociopath. Then you face a divorce, child custody or some other court battle against the sociopath — and you’re traumatized all over again.

The sociopath lies about you, smears your reputation and makes false accusations against you. So do his or her attorneys. And the clueless judge allows all of it.

Thirty years ago, Dr. Karin Huffer, a marriage and family therapist, witnessed this phenomenon among her clients. No matter what she did to help them, they kept getting worse. Then she realized that everything she did for them was being … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Donna Andersen, Laws and courts

15 valuable lessons from ‘The Sociopath Next Door’

The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout, Ph.D., is a classic for describing sociopathic behavior. I’ve never written about it on Lovefraud. The reason is quite simple: I read the book when it was first published in early 2005, shortly before Lovefraud launched. I just finished reading it again.

I’ve learned a lot about sociopaths in the last 13 years, so this read was certainly a different experience. The first time I read the book, much of what Stout wrote was a revelation. Here are my observations from the second time around: Stout does a good job of describing sociopathic motivation, but her book fails to capture how dangerous and destructive these people are.

The reason, I … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Donna Andersen, Explaining the sociopath

Book Review: Domestic violence that lead to a near-death experience

My Sweet Encounter with Death, by Ana Christina

Review by Mary Ann Glyn, LCSW

Ana had two relationships with seemingly opposite personality types. Her husband of many years revealed a controlling nature early on, but as you all know, divorce is not the first thing you think of doing when things are not going well in your marriage, especially once children come, and especially if your culture and belief system dictate otherwise. Ana found herself trapped in an unbearable prison where she remained until she eventually found the strength and conviction to leave. Once freed, she reconnected with a former love whose personality appeared to be the antithesis of her ex-husband’s. She was blissfully happy for a time, … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Lovefraud Professional Resources

Does sensitivity to others’ fear make some of us easily manipulated by sociopaths?

Gaslight

Charles Boyer and Ingrid Bergman in “Gaslight.”

The Fear Factor: How One Emotion Connects Altruists, Psychopaths, and Everyone In-Between: Part A

Recently, I finished reading the book The Fear Factor: How One Emotion Connects Altruists, Psychopaths, and Everyone In-Between by Dr. Abigail Marsh, Associate Professor of Psychology and Interdisciplinary Neuroscience at Georgetown University. Her book sparked some “light-bulb moments” that I wanted to share. The first two are below. The third and fourth will follow next week. Dr. Marsh and many researchers refer to these disordered individuals as ‘psychopaths.’ In my 2015 book, I referred to the same individuals as ‘sociopaths.’

Psychopaths and highly altruistic people differ on how they experience fear, but not necessarily other emotions.

In … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Explaining the sociopath, Hooked by a sociopath, O.N. Ward

A New York model’s marriage to a sociopath

Jen Waite

Three weeks after her baby was born, Jen Waite, a model and actress in New York City, discovered that her husband was having an affair.

In fact, while she was in labor, he kept disappearing to call his girlfriend.

Jen has just come out with a book called, A Beautiful, Terrible Thing, in which she tells her story.

In an interview with the New York Post, she calls her husband a sociopath. Based on the article, it sounds like she’s right.

My husband’s secret double life, on NYPost.com.

 

Jen Waite, 32, a model and… Read more

Posted in: Book reviews

How disordered parents set children up to be exploited by psychopaths

Book Review: A History of a Pedophile’s Wife — Memoir of a Canadian Teacher and Writer, by Eleanor Cowan

Review by Donna Andersen

People born to disordered parents are likely to be vulnerable to psychopaths later in life. I’ve explained this to many, many people that I’ve spoken to in my personal consultations.

Eleanor Cowan’s book, A History of a Pedophile’s Wife, explains exactly how it happens.

Childhood without love

Eleanor was born in 1948 outside of Montreal, Canada, the second child in what would become a large Catholic family. Her childhood was molded by the dictates of the Catholic Church, wholeheartedly accepted by her father, and the disinterest of a personality disordered mother.

Eleanor, who was … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Donna Andersen

Radical Acceptance – a path to true emotional healing after the devastation of a sociopath

Radical AcceptanceBook Review: Radical Acceptance Embracing your life with the heart of a Buddha, by Tara Brach.

Review by Donna Andersen

You realize, or at least suspect, that you have a sociopath in your life that’s why you’re reading Lovefraud. You may still be in a state of shock you never really understood that people like this actually existed. But they do; now what do you do?

Lovefraud is full of information and advice about escaping a sociopath and dealing with the fallout. Generally, recovery means moving forward along two paths. You can pursue both paths at the same time, and progress on one path helps you with the other one.

The first path is solving the practical problems … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Donna Andersen

Why I wrote my new book, ‘Combating Romance Scams, Why Lying to Get Laid Is a Crime!’

combating-romance-scamsBy Joyce Short

Romance scams are a crime epidemic! We read about them daily in the news and many of us here on Lovefraud have suffered from this malicious behavior! We were defrauded of our highest emotion, which is love, and deceived into sex by someone totally different than who they pretended to be. Millions have fallen victim to this crime wave. It won’t stop ”˜til we do something about it!

That’s why I wrote Combating Romance Scams: Why Lying to Get Laid Is a Crime!

I recently learned that Federal Prosecutors in Missouri included information about my blog, Stop Rape By Fraud, in their indictment to lock up a “serial rapist.” He’d used false pretenses to … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Sociopaths as predators, Uncategorized

Save on ‘The Wise Lesbian Guide to Getting Free From Crazy-Making Relationships’

Wise Lesbian GuideBy Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW

In the wake of the Gay Pride Month massacre of 49 people gathered at the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, the world has taken notice of the violence and threats of violence lesbian gay, bisexual, and transgender people face on a regular basis.  

What’s less visible is that the patterns of oppression we face in the broader society sometimes trickle down into our most intimate relationships.  

Lesbian and gay people need to be able to turn to partners for safety, support, care, and kindness. This is especially important as we face discrimination and invalidation in the broader culture.

Unfortunately, for many people in same-sex relationships, home is not a haven but, instead, because of … Read more

Posted in: Book reviews, Lovefraud Professional Resources

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