UPDATED FOR 2022. Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call “Gianna.” She ended her involvement with a sociopath, and now wonders if she'll ever experience such intense love again. Here's a better question: is it love or addiction? Gianna's email After extensive searches for the article already written, I've come to think I should just ask the question. Will I ever be able to love someone the way I loved the sociopath? I am 3 years out of my relationship with the man who almost destroyed me. It's taken therapy, countless books, overcoming obsession, and rebuilding myself from the ground up. I've come a long way but there is still one piece of me that is missi …
Grandparents can also engage in parental alienation
Parental alienation, according to Joan Kloth-Zanard, founder of PAS-Intervention.org, is one parent deliberately impeding the relationship between children and their other parent. It’s a form of psychological abuse, Kloth-Zanard says. In fact, she describes parental alienation as domestic violence by proxy. This usually occurs within the context of divorce and child custody battles. Alienating behaviors include teaching the child to fear, hate or be angry with the other parent, deliberately blocking visitation, and filing false claims of abuse or neglect. When this happens, the targeted parent may have no choice but to go to court to fight the charges and reclaim their relationship with t …
Grandparents can also engage in parental alienationRead More
My ex may be a confidential informant
Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who describes her involvement with a man who may have been a confidential informant. We dated for two years although unequally yoked. The very first thing that occurred was when he initially asked me to date him and after agreeing; although I distinctly told him no Friday date this very first Friday due to me being at the library studying; as I was a studious college student maintaining a 3.5 GPA and above. However, despite both of our parents being professional college graduates, he was a high school dropout. Despite my telling him no Friday date, he approached me at the library. So, with hindsight being 20/20, I now know that was the …
Why nothing worries the psychopath
Psychopaths and antisocials rarely worry about what might happen, even in dire situations, and are rarely concerned about the consequences of their behavior. Why? Why is it that nothing worries the psychopath? A viewer posted the following comment on one of my Lovefraud Live! videos: Donna, can you do a video on why the sociopath acts like life is great all the time, even though he has done great evil and destroyed lives. It's like nothing scares them and life is one big carnival ride. I know a sociopath who even when facing serious criminal charges acted like he didn't have a care in the world and was still laughing and cracking jokes every day. It's disturbing when an individual has …
The sociopath smeared and sabotaged me
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Christine22 about her involvement with a sociopath who smeared and sabotaged her. There’s so much, too much. He got me fired, so he could move on to the new girl, he’s stolen my identity. He hijacked all my accounts, registered my tablet, phone, and google account as his own. I was catching him using his. So he used my computer to register my tablet, he created I don’t know how many different accounts, and 3rd party apps. He’s had me stalked at home several times when I turn my location sharing off. So he couldn’t make sure I was at home and not finding him at the locations he was at and not at work like he …
10 Subtypes of psychopathy
A classic sign of psychopathy is cruelty towards animals. I’ve heard horror stories of psychopaths callously killing kittens, dogs and other animals. My psychopathic ex-husband, however, liked animals. He walked my dog every morning and brought home exotic pets. So he did not fit that stereotype. This observation is a small indication that psychopaths, antisocials and narcissists are not all the same. In fact, Dr. Theodore Millon, who was one of the great theorists of personality and personality disorders, identified 10 subtypes of psychopathy. His work does much to explain why some psychopaths plot deliberate, complex schemes and others act on impulse with no regard for consequences. It e …
Psychopathy gene runs deep in my family
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who realizes that the psychopathy gene runs deep in her family of origin. We’ll call her Laura22. I am the product of an unwanted teenage pregnancy. My parents were high school sweethearts. My father was captain of the football team and my mother was head cheerleader. They got married after finding out about the pregnancy, she was 16 and he was 19. The first 2 years of my life the 3 of us lived next to my father's parents in a trailer. When I was 3 my father got a job as an electrician with a large construction company and we moved to far away. My mother found us a place to live. We rented part of an elder man's very large …
Dad battles sociopathic wife in divorce court
Lovefraud received this story from a reader whom we’ll call Gary22, who is battling his sociopathic wife in divorce court. One month short of being married for 10 years and together for 15 years, my estranged wife filed the divorce with children paperwork. Where I live, having 3 children under the age of 12 and being male basically means I'd better just get a second job to cover child support, possibly spousal support, and hope I have enough money left to rent a place. I know, I know, sounds like I'm just over exaggerating but I can give you names of former couples that are testaments of this one-sided court system. Troubles many years ago I will add since I own my mistake and don't t …
Why we comply with the sociopath’s demands when we know we shouldn’t
The cable TV network NewsNation recently interviewed me for a story about why some women help inmates bust out of jail. This is obviously wrong and illegal, but multiple people have done it (See Top 10 people who helped their lovers escape from prison.) Experts generally report that many prisoners are sociopaths—this is probably especially true of those who plot escapes. So the question is, why do people who know better comply with the sociopath's demands, including outrageous demands like escaping from prison? In the most recent jailbreak, Samuel Hartman, convicted of raping a nine-year-old child, escaped from an Arkansas prison work detail, allegedly with the help of his mother and wife. N …
Why we comply with the sociopath’s demands when we know we shouldn’tRead More
Deny, attack, play the victim: the typical abuser response to confrontation
If you ever attempt to talk to sociopaths about their bad behavior, you’ll probably encounter the following: They’ll deny that they did anything wrong, attack you for bringing it up, and then claim that it’s all your fault and you should be apologizing to them. You’ll be shocked, but you shouldn’t be. Research shows that this is the typical abuser response to confrontation. One researcher studied women who confronted people who had sexually abused them as children. What happened? 44% of the victims heard complete denials from their abusers 22% were accused of misunderstanding the abuser’s conduct 44% were told they were crazy 22% heard a partial admission of guilt, only to ha …
Deny, attack, play the victim: the typical abuser response to confrontationRead More
