After the sociopath, how to feel better quickly — that was the subject line of an email that I recently sent out about Lovefraud's new webinar on Emotional Freedom Techniques, or "Tapping." "This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen," responded one of our readers. I agree — tapping does look ridiculous. My email included the above video of the instructor, Stacey Vornbrock, and me tapping on our faces with our fingertips. But guess what — EFT Tapping works, as numerous scientific studies have found. The EFT Universe website includes a bibliography of more than 100 articles published in peer-reviewed professional journals. Studies have concluded that EFT Tapping is effective — " …
Lovefraud’s online courses for survivors and therapists help you recognize, escape and recover from sociopaths. Here are course highlights and interviews with the instructors.
Coerced debt: Financial betrayal by the sociopath
For sociopaths, the objective of any relationship is to exert power and control over the other person. This is especially true in romantic relationships. One of the things sociopaths want to control is money, which often leaves survivors with mountains of coerced debt. I have experience with this one. My sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery, manipulated me into maxing out all my credit cards, supposedly to support his sure-to-succeed business plans. By the end, he’d wiped out my savings, decimated my business, and left me with $60,000 in credit card debt. I later found out he spent a lot of my money entertaining other women. Using my credit How did James Montgomery get his hands on m …
Healthy relationships after the sociopath or narcissist
“I’ll never date again.” I can’t tell you how many times Lovefraud readers have said this after being betrayed by a sociopath or narcissist. I get it — the soul-crushing experience of lies, manipulation, exploitation and perhaps physical assault leaves you wanting to do nothing but crawl into a cave. But I assure you, you can recover, and healthy relationships after the sociopath or narcissist are possible. The key, as I’ve said many times here on Lovefraud, is emotional recovery. That means allowing yourself to feel and process the emotional wounds inflicted by the sociopath, and probably by other people in your life as well. The work of recovery is messy and takes time, but it is truly w …
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Grandparents can also engage in parental alienation
Parental alienation, according to Joan Kloth-Zanard, founder of PAS-Intervention.org, is one parent deliberately impeding the relationship between children and their other parent. It’s a form of psychological abuse, Kloth-Zanard says. In fact, she describes parental alienation as domestic violence by proxy. This usually occurs within the context of divorce and child custody battles. Alienating behaviors include teaching the child to fear, hate or be angry with the other parent, deliberately blocking visitation, and filing false claims of abuse or neglect. When this happens, the targeted parent may have no choice but to go to court to fight the charges and reclaim their relationship with t …
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Healthy shame, toxic shame and sociopaths
As human beings, we’re not perfect, and sometimes we learn this the hard way. Shame is the unpleasant, unsettling emotion that we feel when we discover a defect in ourselves. Although we feel badly, shame can actually be constructive — it can motivate us to learn, improve, or make amends. This is healthy shame. Toxic shame, however, is destructive; we feel weak, pathetic and worthless. Sociopaths never feel healthy shame, and they push us to feel toxic shame. At the most basic level, shame is a defense mechanism, according to the National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine (NICABM). It enables us to learn how to keep ourselves safe from harm. This was important i …
Video: Protect your money when divorcing a sociopath
Most people, when they realize that they must split from their sociopathic husband or wife, still hope to be fair about the process. To protect your money when divorcing a sociopath, here's what you really need to understand: Sociopaths have no interest in fairness. They want to squeeze you for as much as they can get out of you. Susan Shofer, CDC (certified divorce consultant), explains this, and more, in her upcoming webinar: How to protect yourself financially when divorcing a sociopath Wednesday, July 15 • 8-9 pm ET This course has specific, and practical, learning objectives. After this course, you should be able to: Protect your records and accounts in anticipation of fi …
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How to protect yourself from narcissists
Narcissists are, by definition, self-centered, nasty users with no empathy — although they can often hide their miserable personalities, at least for a while. Unfortunately, millions of them live among us. How can you protect yourself from narcissists? That's exactly what counselor Mandy Friedman explains in her webinar on June 25, 2020, called, Tools for navigating narcissists and other manipulative people. Mandy knows about dealing with narcissists both from personal experience, and through working with survivors in her private practice. She will teach you to: Identify narcissists and manipulators Understand how manipulators choose their targets Build a toolbox for dealing w …
Narcissistic abuse — how to spot it, what to do about it
Due to technical difficulties, the revised webinar is cancelled. The original version is still available. Until recently, there was no recognition in the mental health field of narcissistic abuse. Plenty of people suffered psychological and emotional abuse, gaslighting, and complex PTSD, but there was no term for what the perpetrators were doing. Narcissistic abuse still is not an official term or recognized in the bible of psychiatry — the DSM-5. But because of the Internet and social media, survivors are talking about it, and now therapists are too. Tiffany J. Kettermann, LPC, specializes in treating survivors of narcissistic abuse, and in this webinar she teaches therapists to r …
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How to remain calm and collected during family court cross-examination
If you will be facing an abusive ex during family court cross-examination, your emotional state is probably somewhere between apprehensive and terrified. You know how he or she twists the truth. You may have discovered that your ex's attorney is just as bad. But when they make unfounded accusations against you, will you be able to remain calm and collected so you can refute their lies? Yes — if you are prepared. Lovefraud's upcoming webinar will help you prepare: Take back your throne: Reclaim your power in family court cross-examination Presented by Attorney Caroline Solo Wednesday, March 18, 8 - 9 pm ET Thursday, March 19, 10 - 11 am (AET Australian Eastern Time) Restore your b …
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3 self-care steps to begin your recovery from narcissistic abuse
If you have tangled with anyone who has an exploitative and manipulative personality disorder, you have endured narcissistic abuse. What, exactly, does that mean? Good question. "Narcissistic abuse" is not an official term listed in the bible of mental health, which is the DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychiatric Association). If you Google the term, you'll find the circular definition that narcissistic abuse is abuse inflicted by a narcissist. Mental health officialdom does not seem to have a good understanding of how these disordered individuals behave in romantic, family or other relationships. So looking for answers, we, the targets, have turned to the …
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Video: Mandy Friedman, LPCC, on Self-Care for Survivors
https://youtu.be/qRH9C6E2w4g If you feel confused, shocked and devastated during, or after, a relationship with a sociopath — according to Mandy Friedman, LPCC, you feel exactly like most victims. You may also feel angry, heartbroken, and like your entire self-concept has been shattered. Now what? How do you rebuild yourself? A critical step, Mandy says, is self-care. That's exactly what she will teach you in her upcoming webinar. For more information, and to sign up, go to the link below. Mandy will give her presentation, and then answer your questions. Self-Care for Survivors Presented by Mandy Friedman, LPCC, CCDVC Thursday, January 23, 8 - 9 pm ET • $25 More info …
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