How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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The Maria Story and My Dog’s Stress – Sociopaths Doing What They Do Best

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Editor's note: The following article refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. Maria #1 Let's start with the wonderful fact that this story is about Maria...number one.  Yes there were two Maria stories in my marriage to a sociopath.  This is the first one.  I first found out about Maria on a secondary phone the sociopath had.  There's another story that brings me to finding the secondary phone, but I will start with when I first found out about Maria.  It was a Saturday night and of course spath "had to go and check the jobs."  I had given birth to my little one about a month prior and was at home with her.  I put her to sleep and then went for th …

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Something I Have Always Thought but Have Never Said-Celiac and Sociopaths

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Celiac Disease is an auto immune disease similar to diabetes.  People are genetically predisposed to have it, however certain risk factors can contribute to the onset of symptoms if you are genetically predisposed to CD like trauma or stress, among other things.  When I was growing up I was extremely healthy and strong.  I can only remember maybe one time being sick of any kind. My physical body was very strong and I ate like a pig!  I was in great shape because I danced competitively, racking up maybe 10-15 hours of training a week.  About 6 months of being in a relationship with a sociopath, I slowly started to have these odd symptoms.  The damage had already been done in the relationship a …

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Divorce Settlements-Strategically Giving Them What They Want: Financials with a Sociopath Part 5 of 5

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Part of a Now 5 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4: Divorce and Aftermath Part A Week 5:  Divorce and Aftermath Part B Divorce and Aftermath Part B Now that I knew the business was indeed going bankrupt, I had to make a decision.  I knew by this time the only way to get what I needed was to make him think that he was getting what he wanted.  I knew that he would not stop the fighting in this divorce if he did not get what he wanted.  He would not care how much money we spent on attorney's fees and court.  Having someone to fight with was actually a bonus for him.  He liked the chao …

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The chess game called divorce: Financials with a sociopath, Part 4 of 5

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Part of a Now 5 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4: Divorce and Aftermath Part A Week 5:  Divorce and Aftermath Part B   Divorce and Aftermath Part A Writing this I feel like I am only writing general statements about what happened.  The amount of upheaval that came with each situation and the time and effort it took to even get to these occurrences was insane.  I remember spending 8 straight hours compiling evidence and documentation and recitals for my attorney about my role in the business on a regular basis.  It was a full time job, maybe about 30 hours a week when it was …

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Let’s Talk Financials with a Sociopath – Part 3 of 5

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Part of a Now 5 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4: Divorce and Aftermath Part A Week 5:  Divorce and Aftermath Part B Preparing for a Divorce  Out of Denial Now this is where it really gets ugly.  I am going to try and attempt to only highlight the business details of the story, not sure if it's fortunate or not, but I think I will have enough juice to make a full short story of this. I went to the doctor on a Tuesday and had spath watch the little one.  On my way home, I decided it would be nice to stop by the office to bring some candy to my office manager, the new admin …

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Let’s Talk Financials with a Sociopath: The Downfall (Part 2 of 4)

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Part of a 4 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4:  Divorce and Aftermath The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath In 2009 we decided to buy another house to give us more space to store our tools, equipment, etc because we had grown out of our office and storage space.  I was still running the business out of our home to try and save money.  Also in a strange way I knew that as soon as we moved the business to an external location outside of our home, I would lose all accountability with the sociopath and he would go rampant with himself.  He was and had been using gas lighting tac …

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Let’s Talk Financials with a Sociopath: Part 1 of 4

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This is going to be a 1 of 3 or 4 type post, maybe for the month of June.  Yea, June is financial month. Just as a sneak peak, I think I will go ahead and give the run down of events. Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4:  Divorce and Aftermath Running a Business with a Sociopath My parents taught me really good money handling skills.  Ya know, the basics that we don't learn in school:  Make money, like work, and then tithe 10%, save 10% and then don't spend more than what your bills are.  Seems PRETTY easy.  I got a job when I was 16 and have had one ever since, well until now, but we'll save th …

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Going Back to My Roots

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My divorce papers finalized recently and my name was changed back to my maiden name.  I found myself signing my maiden name a couple times today and smiled.  I smiled because for some reason my maiden name means something to me.  It symbolizes who I really am.  Not because a name makes someone who they are, but because of who I was when I was that name.  Being with a sociopath for more than 10 years made me into a person that I was not; a person that I did not want to be.  I lost myself.  Every time I sign my maiden name or someone asks me my name, I feel relieved to respond because I feel like I am stating over and over again who I really am, not who I became. There is much to talk about and …

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