What should I do?

This topic contains 4 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Stargazer 1 year ago.

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  • #42737


    Hello everyone!

    It has been 8 years now that I’ve been divorced and since then I’m taking care of my daughter all alone. She is 12 years old and has turned into a fine lady, at least for me, but it wasn’t that easy to bring her up. I had no clue on how to bring up a child and I would say my girlfriend helped me a lot in taking care of my daughter. She has been with me through all my difficult times and her bond with my daughter is very strong. I’m really glad that she is part of our life and I want her to be with us forever. Hence, I’ve decided to get married to her. However, I haven’t proposed to her yet, but I’m sure she would say yes when I do. But recently, I’ve been noticing low sex drive in me. I do not get sexually attracted to my girlfriend these days, even though I really love her a lot. I don’t even find watching porn, interesting these days. However, I consulted my doctor on this and he told me that I have a problem of low libido in me. It seems like it is due to my growing age and increased work stress. However, I’ve been suggested to go for a low libido treatment and I’ve been given the assurance that I’ll get better soon. But hearing this, I’m now having second thoughts on proposing my girlfriend. Should I even do that? Would talking to her about the whole situation be the right thing to do? I really don’t know how to handle this whole situation, cause I was really looking forward to getting married to her. What should I do?

  • #42740


    It’s MHO you are in the wrong forum. We are dealing with psychopaths here, not those with libido issues. Since there are mostly ladies in here, how exactly do you think we should respond to your statements of low sex drive? Did you really think you could get advice for that here?

  • #42741


    Wrong forum

  • #42742


    Hi samson! It’s true that this is not a forum for general relationship issues, but it seems to me that your question is a simple one with an equally simple answer.

    What I’m hearing from you is that you have a good relationship with your girlfriend, but you’ve had problems recently with declining libido. This might be due to age, or a lot of things. But do you really think your girlfriend hasn’t noticed this already? Even if she hasn’t said anything to you about it, that might just be because she didn’t want to embarrass you by drawing attention to it.

    Regardless of anything else, in a normal relationship it’s always a good idea for a couple to foster open communication, especially when there’s a problem that can affect both. If you’re experiencing a drop in libido—which has nothing to do with any “fault” on your girlfriend’s side—I think you should tell her about this anyway, not least because she might already be worrying and wondering if it’s anything to do with her, which it isn’t. She sounds like a nice lady who’s likely to sympathize with your difficulties.

    Needless to say, if you’re hoping for marriage, it would only be honest to let her know in advance of possible health problems you might be experiencing, including this one. But if there are effective treatments, it may not be a problem in the long run anyway. Good luck!

  • #42757


    TALK TO HER! If you don’t, her mind will come up with all kinds of reasons why you are sexually cool. Sharing with her will build intimacy, which is the ultimate goal of a relationship.

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