Editor’s note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, encourages you to rebuild life after a toxic relationship by staying positive. Read more about Liberty.
By Liberty Forrest
I don’t read the paper. I don’t listen to the news. In fact, I’ll go a step further. I won’t read the paper and I won’t listen to the news. There’s so much torment and tragedy, murder and misery, nothing but story after story about man’s inhumanity to man, about horrible accidents, Acts of God that cause death and destruction.
And especially given that I’ve spent more than enough time in my own life dealing with the damage and pain caused by life with sociopaths and selfish, abusive, destructive people. Do I really need to hear every possible rotten, awful thing that has happened out there? Does it add anything to my life? Will I be worse off for not knowing about these terrible incidents?
I figure that if there’s anything I really need to know, like the sky is falling or Armageddon’s happening after dinner on Tuesday, someone will tell me. I told a journalist friend once that I thought I ought to start up a newspaper that was full of only good news. He said it wouldn’t sell because people want the blood and guts (my words, not his, but that was the general idea). He said good news doesn’t (or wouldn’t) sell papers.
He was wrong. There are plenty of successful online newspapers and magazines that are loaded with positivity, happy news, and uplifting stories. Some of us want to be surrounded by positivity. Some of us want to know the good news, the happy events, the wonderful moments and miracles that are happening in the world. Some of us want to be uplifted by the beauty that exists in the perfect stories of love and kindness that are taking place around us, especially when they happen between strangers.
Some of us prefer to be connected with light and lovely positive energy that allows growth and movement, rather than heavy, oppressive negative energy that keeps us stuck and stagnant. And if you’re already trying to lift yourself out of the negativity of Life After Sociopaths, the last thing you need is more dark energy.
I refuse to give attention to the negatives in my life or my environment, above and beyond what is absolutely essential in order to deal with certain issues. Beyond that, negative thoughts are chased away and replaced by positive ones. If I find myself wandering into contemplations about anything that is distressing or upsetting – particularly if it’s nothing I am able to change – I dismiss it, focusing instead on what I want – and not on what I don’t want.
I’ve spent – or rather wasted – far too much of my life enduring and choking on negatives already. I refuse to give that rubbish any more of my precious moments because they would only harm me. They would not add anything to my life; they would only take from it. Well, they would if I let them. But I won’t.
Instead, I am immersed in sparkling, radiant, shimmering, positive energy of the purest kind. I close my eyes and imagine myself being bathed in it. I will not feed the demons that thrive on negative energy; I let them starve to death, bloody tormentors that they wish they could be, if only I would allow them to ravage my life the way they used to do. They tore and clawed at it until it was in shreds, lapping at the dark red pools beneath the carcass of any dreams I might have had.
No, there is no room for them in my life, my heart, any part of my being and they are unwelcome beasts. I have banished them from the sacred space that is Me. I am far more powerful than they could ever hope to be and they shall not destroy me again, nor shall I allow any more destruction of my time in this life.
Why would I choose to do anything else? Unless, of course, I had some burning desire to destroy my own life, my own happiness and wellbeing.
All of us have complete control over what we think and how we respond to anyone or anything. As we rebuild life after a toxic relationship, we have complete control in deciding where to focus our attention and energy. We can choose to make our lives better – or worse.
I know what I’m choosing. How about you?
This article was originally printed at LibertyForrest.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.