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Archives for 2013

You are here: Home / Archives for 2013

Breaking the compulsion to “fix” and “help”

September 9, 2013 //  by Donna Andersen//  16 Comments

Lovefraud recently received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Emilie": I won't go into the long, boring details of my 7+ year relationship with the sociopath that invaded my life. It's the same basic story as always and plus, I think there's some kind of email size limit. :) Ever since I ended the engagement over 3 years ago, and finally terminated the relationship itself another year after, I've made comments (in a lighthearted, self deprecating fashion) that, "if you're going to treat me like crap, then I'm the girl for you!" Yes, it gets chuckles from the people I'm around, but sadly it's true. I was watching a movie last night and was judging the characters on …

Breaking the compulsion to “fix” and “help”Read More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Snapchat

New tools for the psychopath tool box

September 8, 2013 //  by Donna Andersen//  6 Comments

Editor's note: The following alert was sent to us by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Jcco." I reconnected with my exP. My guard is totally up but I'm enjoying the show. I no longer use craigslist, i have limited FB use, and no more digging for info regarding the P. He is what he is. He told me about the new app called "Snapchat." The user can send a message/image and set a time limit for the recipient to view the message. After the message is viewed, it automatically deletes itself from the server. You can set the timer from 1-10 seconds. You can delete the app from your phone (if you're hiding an affair or something) and all its all gone. You can download the app again, as needed, …

New tools for the psychopath tool boxRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: After the sociopath, life gets good again

September 6, 2013 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  7 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following article from a reader whom we'll call "Cherylann." I am really not sure where to start. My family and those closest to me refer to him as ”˜madman,' ”˜the beast'”¦ or as my brother put it, I married a cardboard box. I never realized he had no feelings for me or anyone but himself until maybe 2 years into our divorce proceedings. I am not known for my writing abilities and this is difficult to do; not because of the subject matter but because there is just so much that I could share about those 11 years that I was with him. I am not sure how to put it in the most ”˜readable' manner. Anyway, here goes. Not love at first sight Let me just sta …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: After the sociopath, life gets good againRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Recovery from a sociopath, Seduced by a sociopath

Ending My Relationship With a Sociopath: Separation and Manipulation

September 4, 2013 //  by Quinn Pierce//  49 Comments

By Quinn Pierce Shattering the Illusion Once I learned that my husband was a sociopath, it was a lot like looking at one of those Magic Eye puzzles that don't look like anything except random, tiny shapes and then, suddenly, a three dimensional image appears out of nowhere. Unfortunately, this lead to the realization that my entire marriage was an optical illusion covering up a very scary reality.  And once the illusion was shattered, I felt like I was living with a stranger who was capable of harming my children and me in ways I hadn't even realized. However, I also learned that separating from a sociopath and, subsequently, divorcing one is not any easier than living with one.  W …

Ending My Relationship With a Sociopath: Separation and ManipulationRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

Sociopaths and love

September 2, 2013 //  by Donna Andersen//  68 Comments

If you're like most Lovefraud readers, you're here because you were romantically involved with a sociopath. This person probably declared love for you repeatedly, exuberantly and convincingly. Then the individual lied to you, betrayed you, cheated on you, abused you and perhaps even threatened you. You were left stunned, distraught and devastated. How could someone who loved you treat you so badly? A letter Lovefraud received recently might help you understand why that person's love was so shallow: I have read several articles on your site out of curiosity and boredom over the past few weeks, and I agree with almost all of their content. If I weren't a sociopath I would probably find …

Sociopaths and loveRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

I identified with Woody Allen’s ‘Blue Jasmine’

September 1, 2013 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  16 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Imara." Woody Allen's new movie Blue Jasmine, starring Cate Blanchet, showcases an amazing, Oscar worthy performance by her. She portrays a woman who had it all and then lost everything, including her sanity, after she catches her psychopathic husband cheating. I loved the movie ”¦ identified with Jasmine on so many emotive experiences ”¦ and am very grateful to the powers that be that, in the aftermath, I do not walk in her shoes!!!! The movie portrays the plush life of Jasmine and her very successful businessman husband. He is lavish in his gift giving, and in his lifestyle. His cheating is clearl …

I identified with Woody Allen’s ‘Blue Jasmine’Read More

Category: Explaining the sociopath, Seduced by a sociopath

Minnesota Appellate Court overturns mom’s conviction for ‘deprivation of parental rights’

August 30, 2013 //  by Donna Andersen//  4 Comments

Caroline Rice and Brent Rice, of Chanhassen, Minnesota, divorced in 2004, and have been involved in custody battles over their five children ever since. Full custody was awarded to Brent Rice, even though the children said he was abusive. In 2010 the youngest child, 13 at the time, ran away,  met up with her mother, and they fled to Canada. When Caroline Rice returned to the United States, she was charged with depriving parental rights. Last week, the Minnesota Court of Appeals overturned the conviction, saying that Judge Richard C. Perkins and prosecutors conspired to deprive Rice of her civil rights and access to due process. Update: Long custody battle produces guilty verdict, on …

Minnesota Appellate Court overturns mom’s conviction for ‘deprivation of parental rights’Read More

Category: Laws and courts, Sociopaths and family

How our brain keeps us in toxic relationships

August 29, 2013 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  18 Comments

Editor's note: Joyce M. Short is the author of a soon to be released book, “Carnal Abusive Deceit When a Predator's Lies Become Rape.” The book chronicles her life with a predator, the subsequent aftermath and her road to recovery. It also provides advice for victims and their supporters, and discusses the issues surrounding criminalization of rape-by-fraud. Joyce lives in New York City, where she's a real estate broker, professional tennis instructor and a strong advocate for her community. The Betrayal Bond — an oxytocin craving By Joyce M. Short We often see stories in the news about people who meet tragic ends by remaining in a relationship with someone whose behavior should have si …

How our brain keeps us in toxic relationshipsRead More

Category: Seduced by a sociopath

Married To A Sociopath: Effects of Abuse on Children

August 28, 2013 //  by Quinn Pierce//  23 Comments

When my husband and I separated after fifteen years of marriage, I felt as though all I did was answer question after question from everyone I encountered.  But, there was one question that stood out among all the others, and it continues to replay in my head, even today. “Did you know your son was being emotionally and verbally abused by his father?” A Mother Seeking Help This was asked by a health care professional in the psychology department of the children's emergency hospital.  My son had been in a severe depression for months, and I felt as though he was entering crisis mode.  So, at the suggestion of our pediatrician, I drove my son to the hospital.  I didn't tell anyone I was goin …

Married To A Sociopath: Effects of Abuse on ChildrenRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

Saving the world from sociopaths

August 26, 2013 //  by Donna Andersen//  13 Comments

Last week, three teens from Oklahoma were charged with killing an Australian student athlete "for fun." Christopher Lane, 22, was visiting Duncan, Oklahoma, where his girlfriend lived. While he was jogging down the road, a car drove by him and Lane was shot in the back. Charged in the crime are Chancey Allen Luna, 16; James Francis Edwards Jr., 15; and Michael Dewayne Jones, 17. According to CBS News: "They saw Christopher go by, and one of them said: 'There's our target,'" said Police Chief Dan Ford. "The boy who has talked to us said, 'We were bored and didn't have anything to do, so we decided to kill somebody.'" Back in June, there was a similarly shocking case in Indiana. …

Saving the world from sociopathsRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

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Lovefraud Blog Recent Comments

  • Donna Andersen on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “Hi Samson75 – My paper was peer-reviewed and published in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology. There’s…”
  • Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.ED, LBS, CCBP on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “HI Samson, from what I read of Donna’s article, she had more than 2,000 Lovferaud readers as a valid sample.…”
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  • Donna Andersen on The relationship between sociopathy/psychopathy and bipolar disorder: “Thank you for your thoughtful comment.”
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