7 WAYS TO BE NARCISSIST’S WORST NIGHTMARE

This is an interesting article but one thing bothers me: why do I want revenge?

Surely seeking revenge is seeking to emulate the abusive behaviour. How can one do that without agreeing that the behaviour was acceptable?

I think it is far better to seek freedom and success, not revenge. And then to treat the narcissist as the vampire they are.

Vampires do not enter one’s home unless invited in. So don’t invite them in.

And don’t allow the vampire the ability to ‘turn you’ into one of them.

Love to all.

Great perspective acharbet!

Hi, angelstar.

Here:

“If you truly want revenge, here are signs that can help you be narcissist’s worst nightmare.

1. They caused you pain which you use now against them.

Even though you had many troubles while you were with a narcissist, you can now find a way to be powerful and smarter. You are more courageous and their toxicity is now redirected in your benefit. You have taken this as a lesson and you definitely know how to rise above this and how to be powerful as you never were.”

When I learned the truth about what my abuser had done to me, the assault and torture, I was angry and wanted revenge. But I decided not to pursue that as I saw that would mean I’d be pursuing her mindset, adopting it as my own.

Many narcissists and sociopaths, having suffered their own abuses, are hell-bent on wreaking revenge, ‘re-living’ their trauma from a comparative position of strength. I think at least in some cases, their innocent victims are proxies, stand-ins for those who actually traumatised them. Much as some people enter into unhealthy relationship after unhealthy relationship, essentially because they are trying to renegotiate (on better terms) their relationships with their parents. My own succession of bad relationships was, I came to know, my attempt to renegotiate my perceived ‘failures’ to ‘earn’ the love of my malignantly narcissistic mother.

My experiences have lead me to believe that most if not all sociopaths are essentially abuse victims who have adopted the false sense of safety that comes from becoming a predator.

As an abuse survivor, I am wary of the risk that I might too make such choices. I do not want to harm anyone. I therefore strive to rise above that.

Love to all.

What I want with a disordered person is No Contact and to move on.

http://victimsover18.blogspot.com/?m=1

Airline Pilot Central Forums > Airline Pilot Forums > Major > Delta pilot arrested
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icedawg8
01-25-2009, 06:45 PM
Husband jailed for assault, rape

Husband jailed for assault, rape | The Citizen Online (http://www.thecitizen.com/%7Ecitizen0/node/34504)

Suspect denied bond; prosecutor calls it ‘worst case’ of family violence she has seen
A Peachtree City woman suffered two broken wrists and a broken toe at the hands of her husband, who also raped her at the couple’s home in the Kedron Hills neighborhood Sunday, according to court documents in the case.
This afternoon Michael William Ellicott, 47, was denied bond on several criminal charges filed in the case.
Assistant District Attorney Lura Landis said this is the worst domestic violence case she has seen in her entire 32 year as an attorney. Landis said she has personally spoken to two members of the community who asked that Ellicott remain jailed without bond because they also were afraid of him.
Landis said neither of those people are related to the victim in the case, and they both will testify when a bond hearing is held in Superior Court on the rape charge.
Ellicott was denied bond in the case by Fayette County Magistrate Charles R. Floyd Jr. Only Superior Court judges are allowed to consider bond on violent charges such as rape.
The incident occurred over a period of time Sunday at the couple’s home, listed at 209 Portico Place, according to arrest warrants filed in the case.
Ellicott is charged with rape, three counts of aggravated battery (family violence), aggravated assault (family violence), false imprisonment (family violence) and two counts of cruelty to children in the third degree. The cruelty to children charges are because the violence occurred in front of their two children, according to arrest warrants.
Ellicott’s attorney, Allen Turner, said his client has never been arrested before and argued that he is not a flight risk. Turner said he would be willing to surrender his client’s passport.
Ellicott is a pilot at Delta Air Lines, and the company will be looking into the matter, a spokesperson said.
In addition to denying bond, Floyd ordered that Ellicott may not contact the victim nor any of her family members, even in a phone call from the jail.
Floyd said he would revisit the bond matter at a later date should Ellicott gain a bond on the rape charge from a Superior Court judge.
A company spokesperson noted that Ellicott is a first officer, which is the lowest rank of pilot at the company.