We know only too well that by far the majority of psychopaths are men. Or at least we think we know that. Could it be that the criteria used to identify psychopaths are biased towards men? After all Hare began his work in male prison.
Think about it. While behaving and being the way the PCL-R without doubt earns one the label psychopath, this is simply a list of symptoms. It says nothing about the underlying dynamics. If psychopathy is life centered on the principle of power (as opposed to love) and if it is therefore characterised by what Liane Leedom nicely calls ‘warped empathy‘, then wouldn’t you expect there to be more or less the same number of woman as men psychopaths? And wouldn’t you expect them to come across differently?
I am beginning to wonder whether there may be two broad types of psychopathy – a ‘male’-type and a ‘female’-type. I place these in quotes because, when I think about it, men with might be thought of as ‘female’ psychopathy come to mind and we all know about women with ‘male’ psychopathy. And yet, at the risk of being un-PC, I want to maintain these descriptors for now so that the difference I think I see doesn’t disappear.
A ‘female’ psychopath would not necessarily commit crimianl/antisocial acts like her male counterpart, but she woud be as power-driven, as toxically narcissistic as a ‘male’ psychopath. The control, the manipulation, the dishonesty, the selfishness, the callousness – all these would be present, but we might not recognise them for what they are because of 1. media portrayal and 2. medical diagnosis of psychopaths. The difference would come in the gendered style of their behaviour.
In my clinical work I have come across this phenomenon. For example, a woman I now consider to be of the ‘female’-type of psychopath didn’t come close to committing a crime and yet the way she mothered her daughter, my patient, came close to destroying the child’s mind. This seems to me to be a perversion of motherhood eqivalent to the perversion of fatherhood we read about on this website.
Do readers have any comments? I’m particularly interested in any examples you might have of how ‘female’ psychopathy – if such a thing does exist – manifests itself?
darwinsmom
Thruthspeak,
Exactly. I don’t slap people who are panicking in the face, but I will order them around and mae sure they physically and mentally go into a situation and do stuff that they are capable of doing and that feels familiar. It brings people from a mental panic zone into a comfort zone, and then the panic eases off, enabling to deal better and more apt with the situation.
I know that the solution you came up with is but a temporary one, but it will be a much better environment than the one you are in, and it will give you time to find a better more permanent solution. Plus I reckon that a shelter has people working there who can come up with ideas of their own to help you get back to your feet for housing. You, your son and your pets will be all right, my dear!
Truthspeak
Dupey & Darwinsmom, I am not so proud that I won’t humble myself and get into a shelter. It’s my pets and my son that I”m concerned about. BUT….this will all sort itself out. And, having a list of practical tasks – proactive steps – to attend to is an imperative for me.
We will be okay. We most certainly will, and the “family discussion” can just go right down the toilette for all I care. They can keep their pool, their trips to Target, their reality shows, their mutual abuse, and all of the rest. I have got a farking LIFE to rebuild.
Love, and hugs to you both, and all here on this site…..
darwinsmom
Now that’s much more like it! TOWANDA!
Back_from_the_edge
YAY! TRUTHSPEAK!!! YOU GO!!!!
Remember who you are and your value and your worth.
Candle is still lit…
Dupey
xxoo
Truthspeak
Darwinsmom, I’m feeling like screaming a really loud “FARK YOU, DYSFUNCTION!” Does that classify as an actual “TOWANDA?!”
(end zone dance)
Back_from_the_edge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQgMXOW0FLU
For Truthspeak! mwah!! xxoo
Hope it puts a smile on your face…
Truthspeak
Well, well……well. I did call the homeless shelter and I’m waiting to hear about the approval.
In the meantime, the colleague let me know that they wanted us out by October. I told him that I had already contacted a shelter and that I needed to find temporary care for my cats. He kept apologizing and I told him that I was aware of the friction and that I had done everything within my power to remain off the radar. I also told him that what his girlfriend did to my son was not funny – it was malicious. And, thank goodness my son was aware that it was a “joke” by the guy that approached him. But, the g/f that arranged the “prank” had no idea that my son had been forewarned.
SO…..when I came into the house, the g/f was going around in her cow-like manner and I told her that I had already contacted a homeless shelter. Her one-word response was, “Okay.”
My only problem is finding temporary homes for my cats – the one kitten belongs to my son, and it will just kill him to lose his pet.
UGH…….this gal’s a bitch on fire, I’ll tell you!
Pffffffffffft
strongawoman
Yay, Truthy…..well done. As usual, I’m in awe of your pragmatism and bravery!!
It’s gotta be better away from her…..the biatch, lol. I hope you find a foster home for your kitties, maybe you could advertise? I’m keeping all things crossed for you Truth…..The only way is up. Good Lass!!
Truthspeak
Okay, so I was not approved for a “bed.” I also learned that the shelter, nearby, has had incidents of people being shaken down by drug dealers that were staying in the shelter, as well as Health Dept. issues with parasites….uh….yeah.
So…..I”m currently trying to apply for Section 8 or whatever housing I can, any welfare assistance that I can, and all of the rest.
Tzzzzzzzzzzz……..and, finding a vehicle is going to be a serious issue…..UGH!!!!!!
But, I let the colleague know that I had no options and that I would be working to secure housing, ASAP, and that we needed to work together to clear the air of the friction – that I hadn’t done anything to invite it, or deserve it.
So…….onward and upward
Brightest blessings
Back_from_the_edge
Truthspeak: I am so happy to hear you sounding so resolved and actively working on your situation!!!
I am so very proud of you! xxoo
You are like a huge hero to me right now!!!!
You keep going; don’t give up!!!!!
You ARE going to make your way if you just don’t give up!
This is YOUR LIFE and YOUR SANITY you are fighting for.
I am glad that you have cleared the air a little with your ‘colleague’ as well.
Perhaps the stress will lighten up on you some now.
I have been saying prayers for you…
Blessings, Dear xxoo
Dupey