We know only too well that by far the majority of psychopaths are men. Or at least we think we know that. Could it be that the criteria used to identify psychopaths are biased towards men? After all Hare began his work in male prison.
Think about it. While behaving and being the way the PCL-R without doubt earns one the label psychopath, this is simply a list of symptoms. It says nothing about the underlying dynamics. If psychopathy is life centered on the principle of power (as opposed to love) and if it is therefore characterised by what Liane Leedom nicely calls ‘warped empathy‘, then wouldn’t you expect there to be more or less the same number of woman as men psychopaths? And wouldn’t you expect them to come across differently?
I am beginning to wonder whether there may be two broad types of psychopathy – a ‘male’-type and a ‘female’-type. I place these in quotes because, when I think about it, men with might be thought of as ‘female’ psychopathy come to mind and we all know about women with ‘male’ psychopathy. And yet, at the risk of being un-PC, I want to maintain these descriptors for now so that the difference I think I see doesn’t disappear.
A ‘female’ psychopath would not necessarily commit crimianl/antisocial acts like her male counterpart, but she woud be as power-driven, as toxically narcissistic as a ‘male’ psychopath. The control, the manipulation, the dishonesty, the selfishness, the callousness – all these would be present, but we might not recognise them for what they are because of 1. media portrayal and 2. medical diagnosis of psychopaths. The difference would come in the gendered style of their behaviour.
In my clinical work I have come across this phenomenon. For example, a woman I now consider to be of the ‘female’-type of psychopath didn’t come close to committing a crime and yet the way she mothered her daughter, my patient, came close to destroying the child’s mind. This seems to me to be a perversion of motherhood eqivalent to the perversion of fatherhood we read about on this website.
Do readers have any comments? I’m particularly interested in any examples you might have of how ‘female’ psychopathy – if such a thing does exist – manifests itself?
Truthspeak;
Your comment regarding the sexual abuse of women is scary but probably accurate. I am sickened by the attitude shown by some political leaders whose maladroits regarding “forceable rape” indicate a deeper complete lack of understanding and respect for women, something that is shared by many men.
I do not often frequent straight bars, but when I do, I am shocked by what I often hear — date rape is apparently a sport.
skylar!!!!
Where are you? I tried to register on your blog and it kept telling me my email was not correct?
Some children who are sexually abused grow up to be abusers.
Some children who are NOT sexually abused grow up to be abusers.
The majority of children who were abused do not grow up to be sexual abusers.
The majority of children who were NOT abused do not grow up to sexual be abusers.
It is a myth that most pedophile sexual abusers are male. In fact, about HALF of sexual abusers are female. (see Female Abusers blog linked to Love Fraud)
I personally believe that 99.9999% of all sexual abusers/rapists are psychopaths, so if you keep in mind that there are more women “diagnosed” as Borderline Personality disorder and more males as Antisocial PD (psychopaths) and that the disorders and the severity of them are on a continuum of severity, I think that the “high end” of BPD overlaps considerably with ASPD (PPD) so in actuality there are not fewer female Ps, just that they are under diagnosed.
It is estimated that 75% of all domestic abusers are Psychopaths, and in my book, child abuse/neglect constitutes “domestic violence” and I think that women are just as much or maybe more so abusers/neglecters of children, that being the case, I think the UNDER diagnosis of women as psychopaths is more due to the criteria being slanted toward male behavior.
OxD, great insight. I think the point I was trying to make (and, not articulating well) is that the disordered tweak and use their life’s tragedies to generate PITY.
The female ex-con sociopath used to claim that she had miscarried twins at 8 months. She even had an image of a sonagram to “prove” it and would whip this out to make her miscarriage “real.” The oddest thing about how she presented this little factoid that was to generate pity was that she never shed a single tear. Not ONE tear was squeezed out of an eye over the miscarriage of TWINS at 8 month of pregnancy!!! Given that she served hard time for “Theft By Deception,” it is possible and quite likely that she forged or fabricated the sonagram image to complete her story.
Yes, it’s the pity-ploys that tug at our hearts that I am very, very wary of, especially with females.
You’ve said this before, OxD, but it’s absolute priceless: observe people in their natural environments.
Brightest blessings
Animals in zoos do NOT behave the way animals in the wild behave, because the environments are different. Wild animals can NOT be “domesticated” in one generation or even in two…a wild animal iis a WILD animal, and “trained tigers” eating their trainers “out of the blue” is a perfect example, even though 99.9% of the time they are cuddling up to the trainer or sleeping with him.
Psychopaths behave differently in their natural environments just like a wild animal will. And just like a wild animal that is a predator has cammo in which they disguise themselves so the prey won’t recognize them as predators, so des the psychopath.
I saw a PERFECT EXAMPLE the other day, a leopard seal “disguised” itself as a “rock” and a penguin perched there and the seal snapped and got the bird. In the wild, animals can have almost perfect cammo, and so can a psychopath, the “pity ploy” is only one of the “sheep skins” they over lay their fangs with to disguise them. The “love bomb” and the “mirroring” and when you start to get on to them, they bring out the gaslightinng.
When I was in Africa doing wild life photography we filmed an immature big cat bring down an antelope but actually without killing it or even severely injuring it, but the antelope was STUNNED and actually in shock, though actually very much alive, but the cat started eating from the hips forward. I was very much disturbed that the antelope might be suffering, but I have since learned that when prey animals (even cattle) are “squeezed” like this they self calm, almost like hypnosis. I don’t think they really are “suffering” in the sense we might think.
I think in a way when we are “squeezed” (trapped) by the abuse of the psychopath we some how “self calm” so that we are able to endure and cope, call it “Stockholm syndrome” or what name you will. When we are really trapped, we don’t try to get away. What makes SOME of us finally start to fight I an not sure.
I read about a young girl kidnapped and held for over 3,000 days, and eventually she did RUN…why after so long? She’d had other opportunities? I don’t know and in her book interview she said she didn’t know why THEN. Just thank your Higher Power that either you decided to run, or they discarded you. Either way, YOU WIN.
OxD, wow…..that makes ABSOLUTE sense to me about feeling “squeezed.” I just commented on that very thing on another thread, and it makes absolute sense.
Yepper, each day out is a definite “WIN!”
Oxy,
That is a perfect analogy!I have often wondered how to explain what I was feeling;what prevented me from running for self-preservation….My brain was being “squeezed” and “self-calming” was taking place!I truly could not take action at the time;atleast not on my own.I kept feeling,hoping that somehow someone would help me.That happened just once;when my sister helped me get away.I was able to stay away for 5 yrs.Then when I had an accident and started having panic attacks,I couldn’t take living alone.I fell into IT’S trap again.But,I’m looking forward now;I’m healing!
Blossom. it is amazing what kind of tortures the human being can tolerate…being a slave and not trying to escape. Being an abused wife or child and bonding to your abuser, defending them to the death.
In my love of history, first person accounts especially, I have read many stories told by slaves who tried to escape or did escape, and how many others wouldn’t even try.
Stories of prisoners of war who kept trying to escape and those who actually helped their captors. What is the difference? I’m not sure what makes the difference in who self calms and how. I’m not sure anyone knows the answer to that really. Dr. Temple Grandin who is a highly functioning autistic developed cattle handling facilities that calm cattle by squeezing them because she observed the same thing I saw with the antelope, but SHE DID SOMETHING with it. I just “noticed” it but never thought about putting it to use. I own a squeeze chute made from her design and it works. It has kept thousands of people and animals from getting hurt in the handling of cattle for shots and other procedures.
Dr. Grandin made a squeeze frame for herself to calm herself. She is an amazing woman.
Oxy,
Since I’ve left the spath, I understand how quickly I trauma bond when I perceive a dangerous predator. I immediately LIKE him or her. Of course, they are love bombing me the whole time so my rational mind explains to me that I like the predator because they are so nice.
The spath attacks both sides of the brain simultaneously. The left side is love bombed and the right brain reacts by trauma bonding. It takes a strong and informed person to see what’s happening OBJECTIVELY. Then, getting away requires a strong will power.
For me, I have to admit that the only thing that made me run, was the overwhelming knowledge that he was planning my demise. He had said, “You don’t know how near you are to the end.”
Love bomb and trauma bond. Well, this is my first day on this site, but I intuitively ‘get’ what this is. I am celebrating being free of the effects of a manager female spath or whatever kind of predator she was, but I have to admit I spent a fair amount of time thinking about how much I ‘liked’ her, after all her brief, but powerful, positive work compliments on what a great employee I was really hit me powerfully, as you say,like a bond. Even after being targeted and the final humiliation of being fired, there was still this ‘like’ component.
It’s kind of like a cobra hypnotizing it’s victim!