We know that there are many unapprehended sociopaths who, exploiting others’ vulnerability, have greedily taken things from them, material and otherwise—valuable, precious things they neither deserve nor deserve to enjoy, yet which they may feel they both deserve and deserve to enjoy, and often perversely do enjoy.
And we know that many of these sociopaths possess smug, contemptuous and notoriously “shameless” attitudes about their exploitation—these attitudes, and the patterns they form, reflecting the essence of their disorder.
And some of these sociopaths may indeed, in a certain sense, get the proverbial “last laugh?”
Picture the sociopath lying on a Carribbean beach, or lounging on the patio of his upscale Antigua villa, sipping a martini with stolen wealth, smiling as if he’s fooled, and owns, the world!
But we must not forget to ask, especially in these cases, what kind of “last laugh” is theirs? And, of course, we must never forget who is doing the laughing!
Because the sociopath’s “last laughter” is a very different kind of last laughter. It is the last laughter of the emotionally damned”¦of a venal, pathetic, hollow individual.
And so his laughter itself, his mirth at having conned so successfully—should he feel something like mirth, flaunt and revel in it—graphically, screamingly reflect his emotional disorder!
Sure, he may look and feel as if he’s conquered the world, and deserves to toast himself, and be toasted; and be treated like the superman he may perceive himself to be. But again: one must never forget that this isn’t the celebration, even the contemptuous arrogance, of the narcissist who has earned his way to easy street. Â
No, while this may be the “last laughter” of a perhaps very clever individual, of a very skilled, perhaps even talented con artist, much more importantly we need to remind ourselves (and even his victims need to remember!) that, however extensive and traumatic the damage he’s inflicted, his is the “last laughter” of an incurably sick individual; of an individual whose “sickness of soul” consigns him, at best, to a hollow, shallow experience even of his pleasures, including those he’s stolen through his remorseless violation of others’ boundaries.
And so the unapprehended sociopath’s smug, contemptuous indulgence of the “easy life” he’s injured (and robbed from) others to falsely seize—that is, his “last laughter—”in the end exposes only one relevent phenomenon—the depth of his emotional perversion and its umbrella, warping effect on his whole personality, including his sense of humor.
(This article is copyrighted © 2011 by Steve Becker, LCSW. My use of male gender pronouns is not meant to suggest that females aren’t capable of the behaviors and attitudes discussed.)
Good analogy candy!!!! “Magic” or “slight of hand” for sure!
Dear Candy,
excellent way of describing the whole saga.
“A magic show” with such a painful ending. a show which toyed with our emotions, used and abused us and we allowed it to happen.
For LL and some others here, the show lasted for years, it took a long time for the curtain to fall.
Thanks to everyone here for sharing with me your pain to allow my magic show curtain to drop within less than a year.
So grateful to all the LF posters.
have not heard from Katy Did, and Libelle for a while. wish them well.
petite
Hi Petite. Tough love eh! So pleased that you saved yourself with ‘minimal’ damage.
Hi Candy,
do you live in Lonodn or somewhere near London. If it is difficult to answer, I will understand. I am going to be in London on June 3rd and 4th on my way to Scotland. would you like to meet for a brief chat. I will be in a hotel at Bayswater area. we could meet at a coffe shop near your place. I am very familair with train travel in UK, so I can meet you at a place and time convenient to you.
regards
petite
Hi Petite. Thanks for the invite. I’m not in London but would love to meet with you if you’re coming over. Not too sure how this works……but could you email Donna and let me have your email address. I don’t really want to give too much away on here. This will be fun. I’ve never met an LF friend.
sure Candy. give me some time, I will create a new account on gmail or something and send it to you and then you can write to me there and we can exchange emails.
petite
Hi Candy
I made an account : summersapril9@gmail.com
lets see if it will owrk. I understand about not giving out too much information here.
petite
Petite. I have sent you an email.
I replied, please check, maybe I went into your spam folder.
petite
I hope there is some miserable faith eventually for these guys.
The mask of my Creep fell of not even 2 weeks ago. And of course he blames me for his cheating and discarding me: he had not seen me anymore since August (sadly enough a friend of mine told me this after she told him off for what he did). Well if he had actually worked on his paperwork, or used 1000$ on some plane tickets instead of blowing it in one night on drugs and alcohol to visit 3 months, then he would have seen me earlier.
But no, I would have had to spend much more to fly there and back for measly 2 weeks, while paying off loans and credits for his limitless budget use when I’m there, and his and my plane tickets.
Of course, intellectually I already know that I’m better off that he never got to ruin my life and my finances here some more, and string me along for a longer time. I knew and felt it was his turn to actually do something with his life and the opportunities he got from me and his family. And he failed the test.
I’m not religious, and he claims he is… but I hope there is some hell for these parasites. I hope that what Radiohead’s lyrics in Creep describe may be such a hell.
PS, I’m new here. And I’m glad this place exists. At least it keeps me to maintain at least NC towards him.