We know that there are many unapprehended sociopaths who, exploiting others’ vulnerability, have greedily taken things from them, material and otherwise—valuable, precious things they neither deserve nor deserve to enjoy, yet which they may feel they both deserve and deserve to enjoy, and often perversely do enjoy.
And we know that many of these sociopaths possess smug, contemptuous and notoriously “shameless” attitudes about their exploitation—these attitudes, and the patterns they form, reflecting the essence of their disorder.
And some of these sociopaths may indeed, in a certain sense, get the proverbial “last laugh?”
Picture the sociopath lying on a Carribbean beach, or lounging on the patio of his upscale Antigua villa, sipping a martini with stolen wealth, smiling as if he’s fooled, and owns, the world!
But we must not forget to ask, especially in these cases, what kind of “last laugh” is theirs? And, of course, we must never forget who is doing the laughing!
Because the sociopath’s “last laughter” is a very different kind of last laughter. It is the last laughter of the emotionally damned”¦of a venal, pathetic, hollow individual.
And so his laughter itself, his mirth at having conned so successfully—should he feel something like mirth, flaunt and revel in it—graphically, screamingly reflect his emotional disorder!
Sure, he may look and feel as if he’s conquered the world, and deserves to toast himself, and be toasted; and be treated like the superman he may perceive himself to be. But again: one must never forget that this isn’t the celebration, even the contemptuous arrogance, of the narcissist who has earned his way to easy street. Â
No, while this may be the “last laughter” of a perhaps very clever individual, of a very skilled, perhaps even talented con artist, much more importantly we need to remind ourselves (and even his victims need to remember!) that, however extensive and traumatic the damage he’s inflicted, his is the “last laughter” of an incurably sick individual; of an individual whose “sickness of soul” consigns him, at best, to a hollow, shallow experience even of his pleasures, including those he’s stolen through his remorseless violation of others’ boundaries.
And so the unapprehended sociopath’s smug, contemptuous indulgence of the “easy life” he’s injured (and robbed from) others to falsely seize—that is, his “last laughter—”in the end exposes only one relevent phenomenon—the depth of his emotional perversion and its umbrella, warping effect on his whole personality, including his sense of humor.
(This article is copyrighted © 2011 by Steve Becker, LCSW. My use of male gender pronouns is not meant to suggest that females aren’t capable of the behaviors and attitudes discussed.)
Go for it EB, hell you have already fought a bear hand to hand and won, so what can he think he can do against you!LOL
EB -we have a legal entity here called a ‘sole proprietorship’, a type of small or micro business. People use the term ‘sole proprietor’ to donate their exclusive ownership. When i read you post above i was thinking that you need to start marketing yourself using that or a similar term, because that farker may well try to market himself as in business WITH you.
still think shooting him would be a faster and easier solution…but we all know that’s not going to happen.
Life is GOOD without him in it…….I don’t want the stress or any anxiety….
But….I realized I only have control over our life…..and not what he chooses or where he chooses to live and why, so I spent one night freaking out…..until it came back to the top of the circle where I reminded myself of what I do KNOW and what i CAN do.
I WILLNOT allow him to wreak havoc here…..I have CLAIMED my town and chose to root here……and he is NOT welcomed.
He’s got the rest of the world to galavant around in…..and he can just stay galavanting.
I’ve kept ‘up’ on his antics and I have NO desire to be a part of anything to do with spath…..and I will do what I can to keep the exposure up.
I knew he’d get to the point where he’d want a home, a familiar place and the ‘legal’ money to portray himself as he wants….to hide behind….and it’s been 4 years since he’s been on the move. He’s worn out his welcome and exposed himself to everyone knew and i’m sure he is wishing that he could turn back the clock and have a family to hide behind…..because everything was easier then. He could carry on, have his ego stroked and no one knew any better.
Now…..he’s being asked ‘hard’ questions, doesn’t have a home to live in, cars to drive, and no posessions to fill a home, and the money he used to be able to spend without hiding is nothing like he can make at a fast food joint. His mask slipped to his new homey’s.
And he comes back to the ‘familiar’ turf.
Where he ‘had’ everyone conned for so many, many years.
Ummmmm nobody told him anything changed.
One;
Oh yes…..he will CLOUD and MUDDY the business waters and try to work off my reputation….NO DOUBT. Tha’ts his MO.
Funny….that was what I wrote in my ad…..Sole Propieter EB has run xxxx company for yada years…..I, I, I, I, I, I,.
He’s already tried to portray himself as part of the company once…..he duplicated business cards, the same cards we had for 18 years…..and changed one part of the name….it was un noticable.
He put his name and address and phones……
SLICK.
He left them with all clients…..until I saw one sitting up against a phone at a clients office.
I questioned it.
Then I saw the box of cards in my rental property…..
I SHUT that one down quick.
Thank god I decided to change my business card……so now people know it’s me. If he duplicates that…..we’ll be in court.
I opened up a facebook in the company name….posted photos of my work, and made it very interesting….
I sent out an invite to the whole community, until fb shut me down from requests. I will ‘collect’ them as I can……
I will post daily tidbits keeping peoples interest and keeping me on the familair forefront…….so far the feedback is great.
There are a few ‘key’ ‘socialites’ that I connected with…..that I knew he would start with.
I also opened up gmail/hotmail and yahoo emails under any name close to my company’s. He’d go for the free sites since he doesn’t have a landline or cable to get a fixed address.
Shut that down.
So yeah……just trying to think ahead in preparation.
EB, one thing is on your side,, and that is the COPS and I bet they don’t want him in town either…so you might notify them that he is thinking about coming back to town…they will probably make him feel less than welcome—following him home, stopping him for any roll through a stop sign, a tail light out…etc.
YOu can pass the word to a few people and the old home town might not be so welcoming as he thinks it might be. LOL hee hee
ya baby!
(when i went back on the site that i met the spath on to let people know who she was and what her game was, i used an email connected to the main character in her con of me. she hacked the website and found that i had done that. hehe. i created accounts in the names of ALL of her fake effing characters. :))
and you know the irony of what you are doing EB? his crap is gonna make YOU wealthier…BWAHAHAHAHA!
Oxy-Done.
There has got to be irony here somewhere huh?
Everything happens for a reason…..isn’t that what I always say?!?!
Part of me thinks….WHAT….why would he come back to a county where the DA is aware of his shit…..judges are aware of his shit…..and the cops are aware of his shit…..
HE IS THE ONLY ONE who isn’t aware of his own shit?
Remember…..he was the one who told the judge…..”She can make anyone do anything she wants”.
He’s playing with fire…….
moveingon,
I don’t see how the ex-spath can get to your daughter if she doesn’t want anything to do with him. My ex-spath is self-employed, having a P.O. box, getting mail, but not looking at it, knowing that a lot of it ends up in a big cardboard box (that’s where his papers always end up). When he has money, he’s reckless with it too. If we accept the fact that these men have no interest in being the way they should be, responsible human beings, then we’re a little less disappointed. I can’t stand the way they are, knowing life is easier without them in it.
I watched most of the Royal Wedding, thinking that the whole event was uplifting. It’s unfortunate that Princess Diana couldn’t have been there to witness this special day. I got a little choked up when I thought about her, feeling sad for her son, Prince William, that his mother was absent from his wedding. I like his bride, Kate – she’s a lovely person, someone who will be a great addition to her new extended family.
Asking if a sociopath gets the last laugh is implying that two people are playing a game with a winner and loser. To me, this is the thought process that keeps people trapped into trying to “get even.” It keeps people hooked. Sociopaths will always laugh because it’s just what they do. They blow off everything and laugh off everything. They don’t know how to do otherwise. It really has nothing to do with us. They have not “won.” It is just the way they see things and the game they play. They will be on death row and think they have “won” because of all their notoriety. I think the only way to break free is to stop playing the game and to become indifferent. It’s an unwinnable game. I backspathed my spath because it was the right thing to do at the time. And it gave me a sense of empowerment, that he “messed with the wrong person.” But I can almost guarantee that wherever he is, he’s playing someone else, even if it’s behind bars. To him, his whole life is a game, and the people in it are his pawns. What has this to do with me? “Does he feel like he has lost or won with me?” I doubt he even remembers who I am anymore. I think of them like walking tornadoes. Does a tornado “win” when it demolishes a house? It is just doing what a tornado does. And all we can really do is get out of the way.