How to recognize and recover from the sociopaths – narcissists in your life › Forums › Lovefraud Community Forum – General › The judicial system is seriously flawed
October 27, 2019 at 2:26 am #54899kierstins1976Participant
I have 4 year old twin girls with a sociopath/psychopath. I just wanted to share my story with how the judicial system has failed me and girls.
My twins were born July 2015, the second day in the hospital was when I noticed a change in their father. He got very short with a lady from the nursery who was bringing the girls into the room. He was tired and wanted them to stay down in the nursery longer. He was not working and I was paying for everything. In September 2016, he and I had a disagreement while I was giving the girls a bath, he came over and stomped on my foot. It caused a big bruise. The next morning, I called the police and he convinced them of a story that one of the girls fell in the tub and he ran over to get her and stepped on it. They just made him leave. He convinced me to take him back.
February 2017, I was holding one of the girls and we got into an argument and he put me in a headlock. I told him to leave or I would call the police, so he left. That was the end of our relationship. He filed a petition for custody in Texas. The girls were living with me and I was still paying for everything while he wasn’t working. He was stealing items in stores and selling them on Ebay. I contacted the Attorney General’s Office and was told repeatedly that since he filed a petition that they could not help me. I had no choice but to hire an attorney. He failed a drug test for steroids. I ended up agreeing to temporary orders and let my attorney go because she was expensive. He would go a few months without seeing the girls, which was his choice. During this time, he interfered with the girl’s daycare which I paid for because the owner was African American and he’s a racist. He filed a frivolous lawsuit.
I hired another attorney September 2017 to do an enforcement for not paying child support. That attorney didn’t know what he was doing so I fired him. December 2017, I spoke to an ex-girlfriend and learned who he really is. While they were together back in 2003, he got arrested in Houston for cocaine, steroids, hydrocodone, enough for a 1st degree felony. He became an informant for them and it was all dismissed about 30 days later. He had an assault charge against him for throwing her out of a moving vehicle. He has 2 other drug felonies here. He’s from Louisiana so I looked up his record there and was in complete shock. I found 2 more drug felonies and 4 stalking charges against 4 different women. That’s when I tried to cease contact with him.
He posted multiple bad reviews about me on my employer’s Google. He was going up to my work and calling them. He posted a sex video of me on Youtube and an ad on Craigslist’s casual encounters with my picture and phone number. I got police involved. The detective that worked the case tried to get him on stalking charges and online impersonation but the DA wouldn’t take it. The temporary custody orders were very difficult because I had to deal with him 2-3 times a week. The detective put a criminal trespass at my house, the girl’s daycare and my work. All child exchanges had to be done at the police station which he didn’t like and did everything he could to avoid it. He got arrested for the criminal trespass at my house but it was dismissed. I never knew when or if he would show up to get the girls or when he was going to drop them off. He was still causing a lot of problems at their daycare.
April 2018, I got fired from my job because they were tired of all of the problems with him. I realized that I couldn’t have a normal life living around him so I decided to move to Dallas. I hired another attorney for mediation and he agreed to let me move to Dallas. June 2018, final orders were done and I was the custodial parent and always have been. I moved here and asked him to watch the girls for a few weeks while I got settled here. They were supposed to go to my parents until July 15 (they are in their late 70’s and couldn’t take them) and then to his family in Louisiana until Aug 30 and I would get them Sept 1st. However, after 2 weeks of moving to Dallas I asked to get the girls and he wouldn’t let me. I knew he was going to take them and there wasn’t much I could do until September 1st because of the way the orders were written.
He moved to Louisiana and wouldn’t let me talk to them or see them. I hired another attorney mid-September to do an enforcement and writ to get them back. Local police wouldn’t do anything because they considered it a civil matter. I had no idea where he was living and he couldn’t be served. He finally showed up at a court hearing in May 2019 to be served. He called the child support office in November 2018, he told them that there was a custody hearing but it was an enforcement. My child support account is locked with over $10,000 in it pending final orders again. My attorney informed me that the final orders probably weren’t enforceable because my previous attorney messed them up badly. The enforcement hearing was mid-June and I finally saw my kids after a year. The judge denied the enforcement and there were temporary orders done so I could see the girls every other week until the end of August. I got to spend 2 weeks with them in July and that was it. They are back in Louisiana. I want to talk to them and see them but can’t because their dad wants to talk to me every time. I’m about to hire my 5th attorney because I need a very aggressive attorney for my case. He convinced his family that I abandoned them so they call me a horrible mother and won’t listen to me. He’s trying to get child support from me now and full custody.
I have reported him for selling drugs again, food stamp/Medicaid fraud, selling stolen items on Ebay and no one has done anything. He also filed a lawsuit against the detective for false arrest, which was dismissed.
I document everything and have so much on him.
October 27, 2019 at 12:00 pm #54901
kiersteins- You are correct. The judicial system is seriously flawed. Hang in there.
October 27, 2019 at 4:13 pm #54902Jan7Participant
kierstins1976, you are absolutely correct! The courts are a joke. Prior to filing for divorce & dealing with Divorce court, I always respected our court system. Not any more. It’s rigged & corrupted. Lawyers are the worst…they are clueless/uneducated about how to even deal with a sociopath and a sociopaths victim & they too are corrupt money grabbers. The lawyers bank account & scamming their clients is more important then taking the high road in helping a victim of abuse. You are every smart for firing lawyers. I did the same in my divorce case.
I am so sorry that you are dealing with this nightmare. What a heart ache first to endure a relationship with a sociopath but, then have to fight him now trying to get your precious babies away from him.
I would highly recommend you do a search here at Lovefraud on Tina Swiften. She divorced a narcissist & fight hard for child custody at first with a lawyer but, then had to do every thing on her own in court simply because it was expensive to hire a lawyer.
ON her Facebook page she most a list of lawyers that “get” how do deal with a sociopath in court. If you do not see your city/state on this list just leave a message for on Facebook for “Help finding a lawyer” that gets it.
Her book is titled: One moms battle (amazon = worth the money). She has several books out now. She has changed up her website to more a business, her website is “one moms battle”. She also has a facebook page where victims that are fighting for child custody come together to help each other.
I WOULD RECOMMEND THAT IF YOU DECIDE TO CHAT ON THE ONE MOM’S BATTLE FACEBOOK PAGE…to open a fake email account and then a fake Facebook page so that you can chat without your ex, his lawyer or family/friends seeing what you are chatting about.
Also, set additional privacy settings on this new Facebook page with “me only” settings. That way you have total privacy.
Please know you are not alone. Check with your local abuse center to see if they have suggestions for you to get your children back from this abuser.
Wishing you all the best!! Take care.
October 27, 2019 at 5:06 pm #54905kierstins1976Participant
Thank you for all the information. I contacted Tina on Facebook. Her Facebook page made the reality of what these people are capable of sink in a little more.
October 27, 2019 at 8:32 pm #54915Jan7Participant
kierstins1976, glad that you had the courage to post. What a blessing Lovefraud and sites like One moms battle have been for all of us to know were are not alone. That we are not the “crazy” ones..they are. To unravel the nightmare they inflicted on us.
Sending you huge hugs. Stay strong!! And keep reading everything here at love fraud so that you know exactly who he is. I know some people have even bought an extra copy of Tina Swiften & donna’s book book to give to their lawyer so that the lawyer if highly educated on who the abuser is & how to deal with them in court.
You are not alone hon. We hear you!! 💜💜💜
December 16, 2019 at 7:41 pm #55460
Hope things are going well.
January 19, 2020 at 6:54 pm #55800
Wishing you well.
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