Come Valentine’s Day, many unattached people, or people in less-than-fulfilling relationships, may be willing to accept less than they really deserve, just to have a few crumbs of “romance.” Sarah Strudwick writes that perhaps it’s time for a change. Read:
Happy pathological free Valentines Day, on WakingYouUp.wordpress.com.
MoonDancer
I wish you all a very merry Valentine’s Day. I am going to buy a big box of chocolates and eat one piece for each and everyone of you fine lady’s and gent’s.
My x never bought me a valentine anything, or xmas or bd..but I did him and it would just piss him off ..one xmas I gave him present’s and he said angrily ” Do you know how small you just made me feel” oh well if the shoe fit’s…
But REALLY you ALL are very special to my heart, thanks so much for sharing a part of my life that I could never share with anyone else.
Ok I am going to the mailbox now and wait on EB’s valentine’s card she promised…
p.s. a piece of chocolate is better than a piece of shit any day ~!
KatyDid
Hens
Eat two for me b/c there is more of me to llllooooovvveee. heehee.
Vidya
Oh hens, my ex never bought me those things either! We were together two Christmases and I never got a Christmas gift. Didn’t get anything last Valentine’s from him either. I got a birthday present and that was it. Guess I was lucky to get even that.
I found out today that there was probably a reason he has not contacted me since the break-up (Thursday it will be a month since it happened and 3 weeks of NC). He is seeing someone else!! He is channeling all his free time and emotions (what he has of those anyway) into this new girl and I am already a distant memory. Thinking about them being happily ever after is very troubling. It hurts and it’s insulting. Intellectually I know he is not normal and he never really loved me. Emotionally I am still catching up.
Well I am so glad I have not tried to contact him and that I had some pride in myself, even though at times I was curled up crying my eyes out….missing him (or rather the idea of what I thought we could have been). I dried my tears and went on with what I had to do every day. Prayer and strong support from my mom (who hated him) and of course this site have helped pull me through the darkest hours. I am now beginning to emerge on the other side, though the light is bright and sometimes hurts my eyes, I cannot shut them to what he really was. How he treated me. And I can tell myself it was NOT my fault and most of the time really believe it.
“p.s. a piece of chocolate is better than a piece of shit any day ~!”
LOL so funny! He was an utter piece of shit to me. I know if we were still together I would not be getting anything from him tomorrow. Oh I’m sure he’ll do something for his new vict–er girl. They are always SO sweet and too good to be true in the beginning, when they hook you and start reeling you in.
MoonDancer
Vidya – You seem to have a good grasp on the reality of what he is soon after the break up.. You are gonna do fine I can just feel it.. Yes I also vision him lavishing someone else with love and gifts he never gave me. Mainly because he now realizes he damn well better or his ass will be in the dog house.. I think we teach them better relationships skills to use on the next victim..but maybe I am wrong..maybe his is still the self centered piece of poo he always was..
I was just an option for him, he left here in a much better situation than when he arrived…I hope he gives crabs to his new victim, if there is one – I dont have a clue what hes up to – I like it that way….no news is good news…
Katydid – Two for you darlin….
Vidya
I, too, feel like I was an option for him. He began staying with me when he got a new job here in town. He lived with me for five months. When he left he commuted to work for two weeks from an hour away but had already started the process of getting an apartment. So now he had all this money he’d saved while staying with me, a new place, big new TV, lots of new computer monitors, new couch and furniture…and within just weeks a new girlfriend.
He left because he gave me an ultimatum. He insisted I give up a hobby I had 3 days/week to spend 7 days a week with him working on repairing the relationship. I told him I could not do that or I would end up resenting him. (It also seemed controlling to me.) A week later I finally acquiesced and said I would do it. Too late. He’d already put money down on the apartment that day.
Everything slid downhill from there. He did not make time to come over and talk about the relationship even though now he was in town. And he broke up with me the day I was in a wreck. Of course the failure of the entire relationship was laid at my doorstep. I apologized. I took all the blame. And he let me. And he never admitted ANY fault. And then he seamlessly moved on to the new girl, secure in the knowledge that I was the selfish one and he was never to blame.
iminspired
I am feeling that life is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one your gonna get, so don’t take any. I don’t think that made much sense, but it rings so true for me!
Stargazer
I think I will just go see a movie after work today to get my mind off Valentines Day. By the time I get home, it will be time to go to the gym. That will help the day pass by more quickly.
Louise
Star:
I would like to go to a movie today also, but not sure if I will have time to fit it in. I want to see “Shame.” Sounds good. I am meeting a girlfriend for lunch though and am going to stop by a cupcake shop and take her a special Valentine cupcake. It will make us both feel better!
Stargazer
Sounds like a nice day, Louise. I’m sure when I get to work, there will be chocolates and little pink cards from a bunch of my co-workers. They’re really into that stuff. It will be a challenge for me not to eat the chocolate. My paleo diet has been going so well. I haven’t heard of “Shame”. I’m going to see Albert Nobbs, a story about a woman who was forced to live as a man in order to survive probably in the 19th century. I love movies about people who had to overcome extreme adversity and who are loners. I relate more to those than characters in mainstream movies.
Louise
Star:
Do you mean Albert Nobbs with Glenn Close? It looks good. I hope you enjoy it. I normally only go to see the movies that are at the arts cinema…I don’t normally like mainstream movies.