High school boyfriend pursues her, then abuses her

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call, Carrie20.

We met in high school, he was the cool new guy, the mysterious guy. We started hanging out, then we started sleeping together, I got pregnant. He wanted me to get an abortion I didn’t want to so we stopped talking.

We were both seniors at this time so by the time I had our oldest we were already out of high school.

Life went on, I and my daughter ended up moving 7 hours away, it was then he decided he wanted to be a family. I kept turning down his proposal for a few years until one day I thought, why not?

We got married, had another daughter and moved back to our hometown. We took out a large mortgage on a beautiful house, started a new medical equipment company, everything was perfect.

Then the abuse started, first it was about my looks, when am I going to lose weight, then it was about my behavior, I’m too quiet around his family, his friends, they think I’m weird. He’d give me Xanax to “loosen up.”

Then I got pregnant again, I thought it was a good thing, he wanted me to get an abortion, “it wasn’t the right time.” I got the morning after pill and had the abortion over a toilet, alone, crying. I tried killing myself the next day.

I was put into a behavioral hospital, it’s all a blur. I get out and he’s being sweet for a few days, then he let me have it. He starts yelling at me about how can I do this to him, now his whole family thinks I’m crazy, etc. He grabs me by the hair and drags me across the living room into our bedroom, I had blood on my face, he’d ripped my earring out.

After the screaming (him) he saw the blood and broke down crying promising he’d never do it again, etc. I forgave him, my thinking was at least he’s a good dad. Until he wasn’t, maybe the following year, yes he was still abusive, my oldest broke down and told me he was molesting her.

My blood turned to ice and dropped to my feet, I rushed home, he was at his office, packed all we could fit in my car and rushed to my parents. I called the police, we made a report and I filed for divorce.

That was about 14 years ago and so much has changed and there’s so much more to this story but the point is he may be only verbally abusive but he’s capable of doing so much more harm.