I was going about the morning as usual, working on my next book, with CNN on in the background, when I heard what has to be the sociopathic quote of the year, “Nothing says I love you like a Glock.” I have not shared much about my own experience with a sociopath, but one of the things I am most ashamed of is that I did not react more strongly to my former husband’s preoccupation with guns. He did not personally own any gun, but he talked about them a great deal, and he was very persistent about the idea that I should learn how to shoot. He also wanted me to own a hand gun. I did take the NRA gun safety course and I learned how to shoot. I have to say, target practice was fun and I was good at it. I had and still have, an aversion to guns, and so never applied for permission to own one of my own. I felt like a fuddy-dud though, after all our Constitution does give us the right to arm bears, or is it bare arms? I don’t know…
What I do know is that the presence of a hand gun in the home is statistically associated with completed suicide. Access to weapons means a greater likelihood of using them on one’s self or others on impulse. A good thing did come from my training in fire arms, that was I became a more comfortable asking my patients if they owned weapons. All psychiatric/psychological evaluations should include this question.
The sociopathic quote of the year belongs to Drew Peterson, a man who the entire country believes may be responsible for the disappearance of his wife. To read the story visit The Chicago Tribune Website.
Although many people who own guns and use guns are not sociopaths, nearly all sociopaths are in love with guns. This is not discussed at all in the scientific literature but, in my conversations with other victims, they have verified the obsession. Sociopaths are in love with guns because they are the ultimate symbol of power and sociopaths are preoccupied with power. Sociopaths enjoy not only real guns, they also enjoy toy guns and violent videogames. Many studies have shown that sociopaths enjoy violent entertainment more that the average person.
If someone you suspect is a sociopath, wants you to have a gun, please get away from that person immediately. I strongly believe that many sociopaths who do not kill their partners, get their partners to kill themselves. Obviously, a person can also be murdered in such a way that it looks like a suicide. Please notice that Mr. Peterson bought his wife a gun as a Valentine’s day present. How telling is that? How sick is that?
@mango – I hear you!
Mango
If you can do it about alcohol, you can do it about your spath too.
I’ll be praying for you. You’re on my list 🙂
I hope and pray you will be free. I know you can be.
God Bless.
LL
Dear Meg,
STRESS is a killer. I am reading a great book now on diet, exercise and decreasing stress in order to control heart disease, diabetes, etc. written by a cardiovascular researcher (not some Beverly Hills Doctor-feel-good-to-sell-books.)
I totally agree with him. Stress has been proven to be as TOXIC as anything you can do to yourself—drugs, alcohol, etc. I got so sick that I had 4 life-threatening infections in 2 years, 2 hospital admissions, several surgeries, and 4 major drug reactions (never had one before) and it is a wonder I did not die.
It is SO IMPORTANT that we lower our stress levels and KEEP THEM DOWN, by whatever means necessary that focusing on that alone will be well worth our whiles. I allowed first one, then another situation to stress me out and keep my stress hormones very high, and these are very TOXIC in long term situations, though are beneficial when we have the”fight or flight” and have to run from a tiger. Long term, they EAT our hearts, lungs, and other major organs.
TAKE CARE OF YOU, Meg. This jerk is not worth the goo between your toes….not worth the damage the stress over him will do to your body and mind and soul. ((((hugs))))) God bless.
“Goo between your toes????”
Nice visual moxy!!!! 🙁
SPIT……
Oxy–
I don’t have goo between my toes!!!!!
🙂
Thank you for thid info cuz it is soooooo true.
I am having this crazy stomach test done tomorrow and I am scared. They are putting some device down my nose and into my stomach to monitor what is going on. why I have acid reflux on and on– and that it does not respond to drugs. This is why I have had to stop singing professionally– cuz days, like today, I wake up with no voice.
Please pray they see what is wrong. I am tired of going thru diagnostic tests.
They do not know if it is my stomach or esophagus.
wouldn’t it be something if it were stress?
I don’t know- this just doesn’t end and has been going on for four years!
All illness (dis-ease) is stress related.
Read Louise Hay “You can heal your life”.
She even tells you what emotions are related to body parts!
Bruce Lipton researched studies that proved that over 1/3 of all illnesses are healed with our minds…placebo effect.
Very interesting!
When I was trying to leave my xsocio…I got mursa. A good friend of mine…a guy….was having a breakdown from an experience with a socio woman….and he even got mursa!!
Uncanny!!
Mursa can kill. I believe that it was symbolic of being with the x…I was so stressed…my immune system was so weak…
You can’t separate body and mind…its connected.
I refuse to let a disordered person on this earth shorten MY life!!!
Hi Meg 🙂
I went through a (different) traumatic event about 3 years ago and, as a result, broke out in full-body psoriasis…..I had NEVER experienced anything like it before. It was everywhere, even on the soles of my feet…
What ended up healing it was 1) a move to the ocean :))) and 2) changing my diet to vegan and largely raw—as in the majority of what I ate was juicy fruits in abundance and lots of salads, nuts, avocados, etc…I still had my one or two cups of joe a day but that way of eating was so nutritive and so gentle. I remember just intuitively knowing that my cells were screaming out all of the horror that I just couldn’t verbalize or consciously deal with…..*sigh*.
There are some great websites for this, if you’re interested, like http://www.rawfoodtalk.com. Oh yeah, and the bright eyes and glowy skin plus weight loss were nice, too!
I wish you speedy healing. (((hug)))
-mango
My one daughter is a vegan. The other one a vegetarian.
My third daughter and I have been eating lots of what they eat…veggie burgers…vegan cheese …rice, beans…tofu…lots of fruits and vegetables. I even cut out milk..only soy milk.
I’ve lost weight while eating more than I ever did…have energy and feel better than ever.
I don’t even want meat or even fish anymore! The meals my kids make are gourmet!! They use lots of healthy spices…like sofrito..tumeric…basil..and lots of nuts.
We all feel so much better and are enjoying our meals more!
What you eat is a life or death decision. I think of this before I put anything into my mouth.
Trauma definitely comes out thru our bodies…(dis-ease) .
Gotta take care of our TOTAL self….mind and body.
Akita,
I think I know what procedure you’re talking about. Endoscopy. I’ve had one and it wasn’t too bad. I had acid reflux really bad, but it was the IBS that was the major killer for me.
I understand how diagnositic procedures can be frustrating (OY!), but go through it anyway. Better to know than not know.
Hang in there.
LL
REsearch on the physical manifestations of stress as well as the mental problems caused by it has been going on for decades and pretty well proves that the body and mind are ONE, not two.
Our immune systems are hit hard by stress and our immune systems protect us from all kinds of things from germs, viruses and even cancer, so stress in overwhelming these systems breaks down everything in our body one cell at a time.
In order to be healthy physically and mentally, we must calm ourselves and live in peace. Not easy to do when you are living in a WAR ZONE mentality. But at the same time, our PEACE and our CALM is what we generate INSIDE OURSELVES and our happiness should be SELF MADE, not dependent on what is going on on the outside of ourselves.
We can find PEACE and CALM in any kind of situation if we work hard enough at it. Sometimes peace or calm is more challenging than other times, but ultimately it depends SOLELY ON OURSELVES.
Even a person who truly loves you cannot provide you with peace, calm and security–they might die or something happen to them, and then where would you be without your OWN INNER PEACE, CALM AND HAPPINESS? My husband didn’t decide one day to die and leave me alone—but I had put way too much of my responsibility for my happiness on his shoulders and when he “left” (died) I had nothing to fall back on and I became UN-happy, not just sad at his loss, but NOT-HAPPY and not Secure in my own self. He didn’t leave me this way deliberately, but I had ALLOWED myself to become way too dependent on him for my happiness. Others even ones who love us can and do go away or die. So even if we have only GOOD PEOPLE in our lives, we still must DEPEND on ourselves for our security and happiness.
Sure, if someone dies we mourn them, we are SAD, but being sad is not the same as NOT being “Happy” or “peaceful,” it is SAD, feeling a loss, but if you are happy to start with and peaceful, that sadness will not overwhelm you.
Learning to be sad over a loss, but not to let that sadness undermine happiness or security, that’s what I am working on.