Editor’s note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, explains what the Death Card in a Tarot reading really means, and why it may portend great things for you. Read more about Liberty.
As a psychic and medium, over the past few decades I’ve had many clients come to me because they feel trapped in a relationship with a sociopath. Whether it’s a family member or a romantic partner, they feel helpless and don’t know how to move forward — which is why they’ve contacted me for guidance.
Sometimes I’ve used Tarot cards in my readings. Provided the reader is experienced and “in alignment,” Tarot is an excellent tool to gain clarity on difficult situations and decisions.
The meanings of most of the Tarot cards vary slightly from deck to deck. But some remain the same, no matter which deck you’re using. The Death card is one of those. It’s also one of the most feared and misunderstood cards.
And it’s one of my favourites to get in a reading.
This card represents the death of the old and making way for the new. It is about clearing out the deadwood and finding new growth. It is the card of transformation and rebirth.
The Death card frightens many people, for they think it means that they, or someone they love, is going to die — although when they hear it signals great change, they can become frightened of that, too, even if they need it.
You see, we have a natural fear of change. We’re hard-wired to stay safe so we can survive. Something deep inside us tries to prevents us from risking that. This is part of why we stay stuck in those toxic relationships. We prefer the familiar and the known to the unfamiliar or unknown.
Read more: How to leave or divorce a sociopath
So we stay in it because in a twisted way, it feels safer than doing something new.
Sometimes our level of discomfort has to surpass our fear of change in order for us to be willing to take that risk and create something different for ourselves.
Ready or not, great change can be thrust upon us at times – especially when dealing with sociopaths. Although it may be terribly painful while we’re in the midst of it, in the end something good will come from it. When you get the Death card, it’s telling you that whatever needs changing will change — whether or not you feel ready for it.
And there you are, looking bewildered as your life hangs a sharp left, and there’s the divorce you thought would rip your heart out, the career change you didn’t know you could make, the family member moving far away, or your life being blown to smithereens, only to be rebuilt, one tiny piece at a time.
And if you’re dealing with a sociopath, chances are that you’ve experienced pretty much all of that.
How Do You Start Rebuilding?
I know that can sound like an overwhelming prospect. I promise you that there is a lot to be said for starting over and rebuilding, for retreating into the safety of a cocoon where you shut out the rest of the world, what it thinks, how it judges, or what it wants from you.
While in “retreat mode,” you throw out anything and everything about yourself and your life that no longer works for you, or that takes up space in your heart or your soul that could be better used for something happier and healthier.
This is how you lay a new and healthier foundation from which you begin to rebuild your life, one step at a time.
And once you have completed this process of rebuilding, this period of transformation of yourself and your life, you will emerge from your cocoon, a strong and beautiful butterfly, graceful and free of your past. The old “you” who crawled and hid amongst the leaves and branches now takes flight, your beautiful bright colours floating here and there in the sun, dancing on the breeze for all to see.
And just as you look different to the world, the world looks different to you. From the heights of climbing rose bushes, or from the breath of wind that gently carries your magnificence from place to place, your perspective is altered.
When all you used to see was your little corner of the garden, you’re thrilled that now you can soar. With your newfound freedom, you see so much more of the world. There are new experiences just waiting for you, new adventures to broaden your mind and expand your life.
As much as you may have enjoyed at least some parts of your little corner of the garden, you couldn’t go back to that life or that existence. You are no longer that little caterpillar.
And you will never be that caterpillar again.
Yes, it’s true that great change can be frightening. And sometimes, even though we know it’s necessary, the notion of undergoing a complete transformation can sound terrifying. I’ve had more “great change” in my life than most people have ever even considered. And I mean it in a much bigger, broader and deeper way than just the 47 times I’ve moved house.
Learn more: The Miracle in the Madness: Pathway to healing from destructive relationships
So I can assure you, I do understand. I know that heart-stopping feeling of seeing the Death card reappearing in your life, whether literally or figuratively.
But ultimately, when you’re on a path of healing, a journey toward happiness and fulfilment as I have been, you come to see that there is nothing more rewarding for yourself and for anyone who loves you than when you live the Death card and become the most beautiful butterfly your garden has ever seen.
A version of this article was originally published on libertyforrest.com Reprinted with permission from the author.
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Confused by this article. I would think looking into your future is wanting to control your future. And narcissism is all about control. So wouldn’t tarot card readings be a narcissistic activity? Where does the “future” information come from when these cards are being used? What is the source of this information? Are they spirits? Are these spirits–are they welcoming or unwelcoming? What if they are not benevolent? Which then again brings me to narcissism. I really don’t understand this. I though tarot cards were a form of witchcraft–and witchcraft is all about control as well.
Someone getting psychic messages, including through tarot, doesn’t control outcomes with this info. At best, knowing more what is likely vs not can help skew probabilities. We all have free will and so do all those interacting with us. It’s like the difference between seeing road signs and having a map vs driving in the dark without those things. Sometimes I am able to make a better decision and that helps. Other times, things have happened or are happening without my knowledge and I need to know for some personal reason. In my case, often this reason is personal protection against narcissists and others who might wish me ill. In one non-narcissist case, it was a misunderstanding which we cleared up after I got the message from tarot, clarified by a psychic, and approached the person involved. Once we had our clarifying talk, the problem stoped immediately. And in some cases, events beyond even the spirit guides’ control will happen. We aren’t able to control these things through our reactions. Like I was warned about the global pandemic’s impact on me in a way that I initially did not correctly interpret — two months before I was one of the first to get COVID in my area, and before I had even read about the then-epidemic in Wuhan.
So hearing psychic readings does not make us over controlling. But it can help when someone else is trying to overcontrol us.
I found tarot in 2015 while recovering from divorce from a narcissist, approaching an empty nest, and looking for career advice at a psychic fair. I discovered the multitude of YouTube videos when I was told by multiple unrelated psychics that my life was in danger from a subsequent narcissistic ex-live-in bf. At the same time I have gone through the worst periods with these narcissists, I have personally become much more psychic and spiritual. Many empaths (also similar HSPs) are victimized by predatory sociopathic types, so it’s not uncommon to find narcissism and psychopaths as spiritual or tarot topics.
I have found tarot to be one way to get messages which very often soon come true. Even general YouTube tarot readings often come true or warn me about upcoming issues. I have been told this is because somehow in the replaying for each person, personalized messages come through — as in I guess we all hear it a little differently. Spirit energy can manifest real physical things. I have had this happen multiple times personally. And maybe we are simply guided to the videos which cover what we need to know. Somehow, the predictions matching reality have even been for highly unlikely and unusual events which would never have occured to me would happen, but do. So I’ve learned to listen. As one factor in my life decision-making.
The death card much more often indicates transformation and change, as explained in this article. I have been through deep transformation, during which I frequently got the death card. I worried that it might be literal because I have an ailing relative with a degenerative disease. But no, it has not meant their death. It has meant my changing. Which after a sociopath is almost always better.
The real cards to worry about in tarot re sociopaths are The Tower (big, messy, disaster coming), though it can mean ending. And that may be good if it means you part ways with the sociopath.
And The Seven of Swords. To me, the Seven of Swords is the quintessential predatory, manipulative, deceptive sociopath indicator. Readers will often mention narcissism or describe it well, and will sometimes mention psychopath. The Five of Swords seems to be a lesser indicator, but in that direction.
The Lion is a strength card, which corresponds to Leo, but I notice the dominance and overwhelming nature of predatory sociopaths is also captured here. So it can be good or bad. Just as strength can be either.
I also heard while young this was a tool of the dark arts. So I avoided it for decades. But I can say in my later experience that is not true. It is just one more language spirits, and your spirit guides, can use to communicate with you. Believe in it or not, your choice. But it’s one way to find out what’s happening and what the significant person in your life, if they are a sociopath, really thinks and really wants, since you cannot rely on those sorts to tell you truly.
Escapefor1 I was not looking for an explanation of this practice, I want to know how a person can be sure that these “spirit guides” are benevolent? If there is an unseen world of spirits, why would anyone want to mess with them, especially if you have no idea what these spirits really are? How does a person know that he or she is not opening a door that he or she cannot close? Narcissists are deceptive, and so are evil spirits. HOw do you know that for exchange of information ( which cannot be verified as truth) does not require some sort of sacrifice in a person’s life? Either present or in the future?