Geraldo Rivera provided his analysis of the ”¦ Natalee Holloway disappearance case. Prime suspect Joran Van Der Sloot has given a series of interviews proclaiming his total innocence. “The lie that he has fastened on,” Rivera pronounced, “is that he took her on the beach but didn’t have sex because he didn’t have a condom, then left her on the there. It’s at odds with the story he told earlier, but as he tells this story he becomes more confident and more glib. I believe there is a pathological aspect to this man.” The Factor concurred that Van Der Sloot seems psychologically unbalanced. “I can’t figure out why he wants do these interviews because he comes off as a sociopath. If he makes one slip-up he’s done. It looks to me like he’s a danger junkie – he likes this cat-and-mouse game, it’s exciting to him” (source)
Does it matter whether or not Joran van der Sloot is a sociopath/psychopath? Why not just be satisfied that he is a “criminal” and an evil person?
Yes, it does matter, because when dealing with a sociopath the usual rules of human interaction do not apply. Anyone who treats a sociopath as they would a non-disordered person is likely to get burned and to be implicated in the evil that sociopath does. Joran van der Sloot’s story illustrates this principle.
Joran’s father, Paulus, was an attorney many believed knew the truth about what happened to Natalie Halloway, the first young woman Joran was accused of murdering. Paulus strongly supported his son after the murder accusations first arose, and was even charged himself as an accessory after the fact, though the charges were dropped.
Paulus van der Sloot died of a sudden cardiac death last February and so did not live to see the result of his enabling of his son. Joran’s mother, Anita, is now alone to deal with the repercussions of the family’s enabling.
The lesson to be learned is that if you have a family member who has been charged with a serious crime, and that family member has psychopathic personality traits, or is diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, DO NOT HELP THAT PERSON IN ANY WAY.
Over and over again, we have said on this website that sociopaths are able to do evil in a large part because they are enabled by family members and various governmental agencies- including the judicial system and law enforcement. Well, law enforcement does it again.
It turns out that the FBI wired Joran $25,000 as part of a “sting” operation, as they were trying to arrest him for shaking down Natalie Halloway’s parents. According to former agent Paul Lindsay, “the FBI formula for extortion stings is, “set ’em up, pay ’em off, get ’em to talk, never let them leave the room without handcuffs on.” Because the FBI did not understand the psychology of their suspect, they let him leave the room and were out smarted by a sociopath.
The lesson to be learned here is that next time the FBI wants to sting a sociopath they should contact Lovefraud so that Donna and I can tell them not to give a sociopath any money”¦ that is unless they want the sociopath to use the money to kill someone.
One more lesson to be learned from the van der Sloot case is that media psychiatrists should stop confusing people with their false categorical statements. I came across this analysis of van der Sloot by psychiatrist Keith Ablow (who I have criticized before):
“Serial killers whether organized or disorganized are always made, never born. Having interviewed dozens of killers myself, I can tell you that it turns out that evil never appears ”˜out of the womb’.”
Well, I knew Rodney Alcala, and I can tell you that he was born with a disposition to become a serial killer that was present in his early childhood. Serial killers are both born and made. Evil is in the genes of some people but like many other traits it needs the right soil to take root and blossom.
Hi, again guys! Mama gem is kicking butt as the say in the US of A!
After untold years of crap ,putting up with shiat from my biatches of daughters, I am finally emerging from the shadows.
For the last 3 days, Ive woken up with this in my mind,
“Out of the darkness into the Light” The light of TRUTH. NO MORE hiding, shadows, putting up with lies, half truths, evasion, denial, shaming,”gaslighting’, false blame from them,”passive aggression, and splitting., {which I found out is the name for what they do to you, ie, suddenly split you off with no explanation.} I posted 2 pics of the 2 kids of my second spath D whom Ive never seen, with a caption,” these are the lovely children Ive never seen. My precious Grandkids.”I also put in pics of some of my oil paintings, the ones that I rescued, an d the ones my brother had stored in his shed for 16 years.I said,”These are luckily for me my saved pictures, the rest were destroyed by my daughter and by my ex husband.”
If there isa reaction, so what? What can they do? Can the relationshits be any worse? No. But I fel better, now that the truth is out, Im no longer “playing nice”, and staying invisible, docile, and compliant.This is the beginning of my NEW LIFE without these biatches in it. I have no more to fear.Ive done nothing wrong, in fact, for years a nd years,{around 30 years] I have given and given to them, and been treated in return with contempt, disdain, lies, splitting,condemnation and sneering.and emotional blackmail, and pleas to their pity parties.
I wont be putting myself ever again in a position where they can do this to me.I have a new life with my lovely husband, and my new adult kids from Iran, who treat us with love, respect, and affection. Whethe I gave birth to these biatches or not, I owe them NOTHING MORE< ever.Its taken me till the age of 71 years young to "get" all this, and finally make the complete break that I need for my very life and sanity. My trip to Scotland was a dress rehersal in saying "Goodbye, to my old home, to dear friends, to places, to the ghosts of my parents,to my pompous, chauvinist brothers, to EVERYTHING.
Ive let it ALL GO. Now, I have to do the sam,e, emotionally and mentally and physically with my spath daughters, for GOOD.!!Love, and {{{{HUGGS!!!}}} your new, resolved, light, and free mama Gem.XXXX
What I am having difficulty comprehending is why the words “sociopath” or “psychopath” are seldom used in the media. Perhaps there’s a fear of mislabeling or of lawsuits.
So, what is more perplexing is when we have an opportunity dumped in our laps, whereby Peruvians have begun the likely correct labeling of this alleged criminal, yet we broadcast statements from and interviews of these non-experts purporting otherwise.
It is my understanding that the generally accepted premiere expert, Robert Hare, won’t submit to solicitations of his expertise publicly because of his revulsion to sensationalism. However, here we have real-life events about which he could comment on the news, and surely there’s a multitude of professionals, partly due to his training, who could speak up. Where are they?
Why do these opportunities to educate the mainstream keep slipping by?
Dear SocioSibs,
There is still some lack of concensus in the professional groups about 1) the name 2) the symptoms 3) cause 4) treatability etc. etc.
While many SERIAL killers are called psychopaths/sociopaths/anti-social-personbality-disorder etc., people don’t seem to think that unless a person IS A SERIAL KILLER that he can be (any one of the above names).
People are more apt to be harmed by the REAL psychopath next door who is NOT a criminal, than they are by the criminals who are ALSO psychopaths.
Until our justice department comes to realize that these people cannot be REHABILITATED and must be kept locked up, AND our medical establishment decides that they can come to a definition and a concesus about name and symptoms, NO ONE in the public will be even half way safe!
The only thing WE can do is to educate ourselves, and to educate as many others as possible.
Glad you are here! Your questions are very good, andn yes, I wish Dr. Hare would be more publicly outspoken, but his books and continued research are very helpful and he does I guess deserve a LIFE! LOL
Dear Gem,
Isn’t it amazing what it feel like to LET IT GO, to realize there is nothing that you can do except get out of the trap and move on!
To make a new life for ourselves even at our “advanced ages” we have LIFE LEFT.
I don’t want to go on being sad, mad, disappointed, broken hearted, etc etc—and God Forbid! Not HOPEFUL—that these people will suddenly see the light and turn and LOVE ME. It ain’t gonna happen. They had their chance and they made it quite plain that they do NOT care about me, and the chances of them changing their mind are about like me winning the LOTTO! So I’m not making any plans for spending my lotto money and none for a reunion with my blood family either!
I think about our poor sweet Lily and how she tried to hang on to the bitter end that even one of her children would care if she lived or died or not. The last time I spoke to her she was so confused I’m not sure she even knew where she was, so I guess in the end that was God’s way of calming her heart at the last. It makes me get tears in my eyes just thinking about her, but she is not suffering any more and Gem, she told me over and over again how much LOVE FRAUD and the people here (especially you) meant to her! So that helps dry my tears somewhat when thinking about her!~ ((((hugs)))) and TOWANDA, GEM!!!!!
gem, God Bless you on your journey towards the light of truth. I have a daughter, and just hearing how yours treated you just rips me in half. I feel the same, that God has pointed me towards the truth, and I can’t deny it anymore! Someday we will feel free! He has promised us these things. I believe it.
Thank you, Oxy,and Chic! Jesus said,”You shall know the truth and THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE!”
Or as Martin Luther King, said,
“Free at last, praise God, were free at last!!
Isnt it great when you know that you know that you know that youll NEVER EVER put up with this spath shit ever again! TOWANDA and Blessings to us all as we move towards the light of a new spath free day!!.{{HUGS}}} mama Gem.XXX
You go girls !!!! I am a little younger (54) and am trying to learn all I can from you all. Gem, I never did get the posts you were trying to send me. Oxy, I don’t know if either is worse…you have the son and Gem and I have the daughters. My S-path step daughter is trying to stir a little crap with her poor mother in law right now. When you say no more enabling do you all mean to just call them out on everything you notice that they do? Sometimes I think the fear of exposing them is probably worse than any punishment they may inflict on us. Gem, I also understand the grandkids thing. I have 4 that live an hour away. I know that’s not very far, but it might as well be 500 miles. I rarely get to see them, and I grieve so much for them. They will probably end up just like their Mom….pregnant as teenagers, in trouble with the law, living parasitic lifestyles, etc. God I hope not..but that is all they have been exposed to. Oxy, in a way you should be thankful that your normal son has decided not to even chance it. You both just seem to have somehow climbed up above the temptation to enable them. I know it had to be so hard, but you seem to have overcome. Gem, I also have been in all this for about 30 years. I don’t think you ever get too old to be happy, or at least want to be. Do either one of you girls have experience with passive aggressive men? It has taken me all this time (decades) to come to realize that is exactly what my husband is (textbook). There should be a blog on that subject!!! He is the poster boy for that disorder. As for Joran Van der Sloot…..one thing that bugs me about him is that I have always thought s-paths had weird eyes…I do not see that with him! He just looks like your average young guy that lives in your neighborhood. I mean he has a baby faced look and just looking at him I would never pick it up, and I think I’m pretty good at spotting them now….but I would have missed on that one! Do you all agree that you can’t always go on appearance? Gem, I’m happy for your revelations ! Oxy, reconsider writing that book ! I smell “best seller”. Love you girls…..
geminigirl, sorry to burst your bubble of Spath free days, but scriptures tells us that at the end of days, famine will be widespread around the globe. This famine is not the lack of bread to eat, it is the lack of hearing God’s truth. People starving for truth. The more folks reject His truth, the more chaos takes over the world. Hence, why those that don’t read His Truth believe in the anti-christ when he comes down pretending to be Jesus. This happens on the 6th trump, 6th seal, 6th vile aka 666.
I believe we will be witnesses, testifying against Satan and what His evil did to our lives.
Oxdrover;
“Jamie’s making hateful remarks about your tree, your pie, etc. is so typical…” that seems true but there is more to this. The first thing I showed him when he walked into my apartment was a gift from an AIDS agency for all my volunteer work — a very large print of the AIDS quilt on display in DC. I believe this put Jamie on edge as I was again close to “unmasking him” and his HIV+ status.
The diss of the tree was mild and candle mild, his outright anger at the pie was something I found very curious. My initial reaction to all this was literally thinking to myself “Jeez this guy has intimacy problems…” I also thought maybe I was moving too fast too soon, even though we talked about doing something cozy.
That later he would take me to the hospital where I would be diagnosed with an opportunisitic infection (Thrush) common to HIV+ individuals was quite ironic.
Interestingly, the pie incident was what finally convinced me that Jamie was HIV+. The dating website alluded to it via a question, then there was the revelation of his interest in bareback sex from his Xtube account. Remember, he used the same name for his dating website account name and Xtube.
These gave me the strong suspection that he was HIV+, but the pie thing sealed it. Why would somebody gat so angry at a pie? Because he can’t eat sweets so as to control Thrush infections.
Sociopaths are great at creating a persona. Often this persona is at conflict with their real self. When somebody comes close to the truth, they become inappropriately angry due to their poor impluse control.
This is why Jamie jumped ship on me as well. By being open about my own HIV scare, I simply came too close to unmasking him.
BehindBlueEyes:
“Sociopaths are great at creating a persona. Often this persona is at conflict with their real self. When somebody comes close to the truth, they become inappropriately angry due to their poor impluse control.”
This is so true.
I have seen this same dynamic in certain people I have encountered.
And, depending on how threatened they are by you, they will become inappropriately angry, or they may try to smear you, or even harm/kill you.
I think it just depends on what you are dealing with and the circumstances surrounding the situation….a.k.a. what’s at stake.