Separated parents Dmitriy and Svetlana Kanarikov had an agreed-upon visitation schedule for father Dmitriy to spend time with his 3-year-old son, Kirill. The visits seemed to go well until Dmitriy tossed his son off a high rise building and then jumped to his death as well.
The couple had separated in August, when Dmitriy had turned violent toward Svetlana. Dmitriy had threatened his estranged wife, telling her “he would take the child away” and “she would ”˜shoot (herself) from grief,’” Svetlana Kanarikov revealed. Svetlana believed this was Dmitriy’s “sick way” of following through on that threat.
Mom of boy, 3, thrown from roof of Manhattan high-rise calls it husband’s ”˜sick way’ of stealing kid, from NY Daily News
Tragic.
Okay, I think we need a happy story now. 🙁
The experts agree that emotional detachment to all other humans is a primary trait of the psychopath. This includes wives/husbands, children and all family members. It is inconceivable to the rest of humanity that anyone is capable of complete emotional detachment. But as the experts all agree, it is a fact that just IS and all attempts at analysis is futile. They have the same emotional sensations in leaving a child/wife/mother/father etc. as the rest of us get from turning off a lightbulb or taking out the garbage. This complete lack of emotions is precisely what makes psychotics so successful in life; they can fire and hire at will without the emotional baggage we victims often have. It just IS!
But isn’t it possible that we, the victims, cannot be emotionally attached? When you consider what we go through. Depending on upbringing we can become this way. My parents were narcissists, my first ‘best’ friend was a sociopath. I grew up in what one book about narcissism called a mental and emotional ‘concentration camp’.
I often, if not always, feel detached from others but remain kind and thoughtful…just not attached.
Barb,
Certainly, emotional detachment can be one of the many results of emotional trauma in our lives. Trauma creates norepinephrine, the fight or flight hormone. Continued trauma floods the amygdula and creates an imbalance in emotional chemistry. Emotional trauma has proven to be as potent in creating long-lasting problems as physical trauma.
People who grow up in disordered homes often have difficulty in connecting. They can respond to their brain chemistry in many ways, including disassociation, being hyper vigilant, paranoid, excessively controlling, and more. There are many differing types of protections that a victim might adopt. And some try to self medicate their pain through alcohol and drugs.
Unlike the sociopath, however, who is unlikely to be changed by therapy, someone who experienced trauma producing conditions can be helped. Self awareness is the first step to transformation.
Wishing you the best!
Joyce