Dinner in Bed
The spath convinced me to have his 17 year old niece come from his country and have us house her to try and give her a chance to live here. I agreed. Seemed noble, right? In November she came. I conceived my daughter in January; she was still in our home.
I wanted her to have a good chance at life so I got her plugged into school here to learn English, taught her how to drive, took her to get her hair done, you know all those things. There was a language barrier because she did not speak English, but I spent a lot of time and effort helping her.
One night I had one of my girlfriends over and we were cooking dinner. I hadn’t seen my niece nor the spath around for a while; it was quiet. Finally the dinner was done and I went to go look for them to tell them that dinner was ready. I went up in my room and to my freakin wonderment they were both laying IN MY BED looking on a laptop. I said, IN my bed, not on. The spath didn’t have a shirt on and she was laying next to him.
Throw up, pit in stomach, rush of heat through out your body, going to go insane, what in the ef going on here!?!!? I immediately rushed down to my friend and told her I needed her to come up stairs immediately. She did.
She walked in with them still in their positioning and I asked her in a loud voice of course, “is this appropriate?!” I mean come freakin on! She was so embarrassed. She responded no. I’m sure that was so uncomfortable for her to see that and be there. Geez.
I reamed into him. I don’t remember what sad excuse he gave me that day to allow my 17 year old niece to lay in my bed next to him with his shirt off while I was walking around in the house. Is nothing sacred? Nope, not if you’re a spath.
Must I Explain?
I had a long conversation with spath about why this was completely inappropriate, which is an absurdity in itself that I even had to explain it! My niece was very upset. I’m not sure what really went on there. But I remember spath sending me a picture from when he was visiting his parents and his other niece was also in his bed. I just thought, ‘hm that is a little odd.” She was older too. You would think maybe if they were really young, like under I don’t know 8 or something? But to me, laying around on his chest at that age is bizarre.
Things were a little awkward, but then fizzled out after that night. Then my niece started to cop an attitude. She was so sweet, then she was not. I don’t know if her real personality was coming out or something else happened.
Now that I am on the outside looking at the family dynamics, it’s quite strange. I do remember her trying to tell me something about him, something about how he really was. But because of the broken English I wasn’t sure what exactly she meant. Now that I think about it, I definitely think there was a correlation to her behavior and his actions.
Is Everyone Off Their Rocker in This Family?
My ex Father in Law paraded around with multiple women their entire upbringing. My ex Mother in Law put up with it, however they were never married, they just lived together. My ex Brother in Law went to prison for sodomizing and kidnapping his step daughter, he also cheated on his wife who knows how many times. My ex Sister in Law was into all kinds of trouble and had my niece with a man that tried to burn the kids and her alive in their house by setting it on fire. Now wait a minute? I don’t know. All I know is that is some intense stuff. I think and wonder to myself what happened? Deep down I believe the kids were molested or something for an entire family to have that kind of stuff going on.
Morning sickness and Gina
Anyway, morning sickness started to kick in and I was running to the sink every morning. It was a lot having my niece in the house and taking care of her, even though she was 17 because she relied on me to help her and take her places. I tried to find things for her to do. About 4 months into it I went to get up early to take her to my Mom’s school so she could volunteer. Ding! There went the spath’s phone at like 6 am. Again I thought to myself, that is an odd time for that to be going off.
So I checked it, ya know, going with the good ol gut. Gina. Great, what’s this now? There was a texting trail, she had sent him a kiss face and said some stuff, maybe good morning or some crap like that. But my eyes diverted to the earlier part of the text, possibly from the night before. “Kiss face, kiss face, you made my day the best ever.” This was an outgoing text to her from the spath. Really? Goodness. Really? I think we all know what that is. Another affair.
There’s Always a Lie
What is this?! Another lie. Something about how she was someone that worked at the bike store that he went to and he wanted these tires and she had them special ordered and got them for him. Right, how about no? I don’t think so, not at 6 am.
I screamed and I yelled. He didn’t care. What he was concerned about was me not waking my niece downstairs. That’s how it always was. What was more important was the appearance even though I was going out of my mind because he drove me crazy.
After almost 6 months of my niece being there, I finally said, she’s got to go. I can’t do this whole pregnancy thing and him cheating and me taking care of the niece and taking care of the business, no. Gina became another memory of his unfaithfulness that haunted me for years after; something I never could put my finger on until I finally realized he was a Narcissistic, Sex Addict, Sociopath.
Peace in Chaos – OMG. Your story gets more and more outrageous.
It does. Every week that goes by I think to myself, “oh, I can tell that story…oh yea I forgot about that, I can tell that story.” Seems endless. : /
Your story is a testament to psychopathy being part of the gene pool that’s passed along! I’m sure many of us can feel your pain, Peace.
The mixture of brain chemistry and developmental issues is such an important factor in the creation of morality.
Wishing you success in breaking free and moving on!
Joyce
Thank you for your comment. Breaking free still in progress, but there is progress!
OMG! Wow, I am so sorry that you went through this. They are out there. My father did the same to my mother. He brought my friend home as his niece. My mother went and told her mom and her mom got there in time. He had molested me and my other sister as children. What sick bastard clowns! I believe like you that they were molested, as this is where this behavior stems from. I was molested, but I love children. I have vow to protect them for this, so I have been an elementary school teacher for over 20 years. I adore children and can’t imagine them being hurt. I am surrounded by 23 nieces and nephew who are growing healthy and strong and well rounded. It will be over my dead body that anyone affects them like this. Again, I am so sorry….
I am sorry that happened to you. Your comments once again solidifies my decision to fight for full custody of my daughter. I hope for your continual healing in life and commend you for your life’s mission to help other children. Best wishes!