Editor’s note: Lovefraud recently received this email in response to a previous article written by a self-proclaimed sociopath.
I’ve read the article titled A sociopath claims, ”˜We are the uniquely gifted,’ and most of replies to it.
First of all I’d like to make clear that the author of that letter is narcisisstic and quite delusional as he thinks himself some kind of superhuman. But apart from that, most of the things he said are true.
Wouldn’t you use the so called ‘gift’ of manipulation if it ensured you got what you wanted if the goal was otherwise unattainable? After all, it is you who let us manipulate you.
From replies you can clearly see that people are afraid and that’s the first sign of weakness a sociopath would spot. And I must say I’m disgusted by comments such as this: “I say put ’em all together on a tiny little island and they can lie as intelligently as they please and prove how gifted they are to EACH OTHER!!!” Is this what I’m supposed to show pity to?In reply to the comment I say that most sociopaths are clever enough not to try it on each other. Even if we do, it’s more of a game than anything else.
Second of all, saying that we can’t feel love is a shameless lie. We are capable of loving, only it’s in our nature to be suspicious, so it takes time to form a real relationship. Only because you haven’t proven to be worthy of it, doesn’t mean someone else won’t. Claiming that we’re uncapable of being in a relationship or being parents is offensive.
And making a group that demonises us doesn’t exactly give us a reason to ignore our abilities so you could lead happier lives.
Other than that I believe that the idea of us being ruthless, merciless and such, unfortunately comes from our own circles, as some individuals, such as the man who wrote the article, can’t help but brag about his ‘gifts.’ Highly functioning sociopaths won’t let you know what they are, nor will you be able to recognize them in a crowd.
I don’t understand why you put criminals, killers and lunatics as an example of a sociopath and psychopath as most of us are intelligent enough not to ruin our own lives by 1st exposing ourselves and 2nd engaging in a criminal activity. Most of those criminals have far worse diagnosis than sociopathy and psychopathy to go along with these.
And lastly, why should we change? I always looked down on people my age, and as a result I used to read 5 books a week from when I was 10. I still read a lot and am working on improving myself as well as my ‘abilities’ as I admit I have no respect for today’s society in which you’re judged as a freak as soon as anyone realizes you’re too intelligent to watch ‘Big brother’ like the rest of the ‘normal’ crowd.
The level of dysfunction can vary in a pretty broad range. So trying to paint all morally disordered folks with a broad, all encompassing brush never works. I think it’s sufficient to say that they lack “affective” empathy and therefore “conscience.”
That’s not to say that they didn’t learn the morals of society as they developed. They just didn’t apply that morality to themselves. If they choose to conduct themselves in a way that “fits” into an acceptable pattern of behavior they can. But their selfish interest, not their concern for others, is what keeps them in check.
They know wrong from right. Their decision to conduct themselves “wrong” or conduct themselves “right” is not motivated by morality, but by personal gain.
At the darkest end of the spectrum, they are compelled to do wrong, but I believe that convenience and self interest guides the behavior of most morally disordered people. And that’s why they are tried for their crimes. They made a selfish choice to harm others.
My book conveys a better sense of this than what I can discuss here.
Joyce
Again, this guy is not a psychopath: he is, like the writer of first letter, megalomaniac (see my post in the “We are uniquely gifted” forum.)
Psychopaths would never engage in such writings or arguments. A real psychopath has no time for such thing. Only those who crave attention engage in such arguments. To me, a psychopath defending psychopathy is like a mad man saying that he is not mad. It does not work!
Like a Zen koan, the unanswerable question of “why” a kook “should” change spurs me on to try and answer it!!
So I shall.
A kook type person “should” change their unacceptable and predatory behavior because in any system, in any model, in any program, their approach results in a net loss over time and is therefore unsustainable.
As agents of unnecessary and unwelcome destruction, going about their tasks of interpersonal abuse, they deliver no benefits.
And that, my friends, is why kooks should change.
Only a kook would ask such a lame question.
He may not be serial killer level psychopath but certainly as a social predator, pegs squarely somewhere on the scale of the assay.
A psychopath will never change as he/she continually finds victims to bleed. If one victim balks, he/she just goes on to find other new ones. Only if he commits major infractions (i.e. kills), is he ever brought to justice.
“I don’t understand why you put criminals, killers and lunatics as an example of a sociopath and psychopath as most of us are intelligent enough not to ruin our own lives by 1st exposing ourselves and 2nd engaging in a criminal activity. ”
A large amount of the people you mention above DO FALL in the sociopath/psychopath category, maybe unfortunate for a handful of you that consider yourselves “normal” within an abnormal construct.
We do not existed to vilify ourselves, rather to give testimony to the destruction, violence, and crime committed against us by others who are sociopaths and psychopaths.
People who manipulate life situations, control the people in them like pieces on a board in their own diabolical chess game, are doing something VERY wrong.
Hey if you feel love that’s great, if you can sustain it longer than deciding you’re going to move on to the next person due to your current partner “is suddenly not worthy”, you need to examine that. In the meantime, we’ll run as far away as possible.
Well said Flicka! It’s high time for some societal enlightenment so their misdeeds land on less shoulders!
Joyce
Babs-
Your arguments indicate that you have a conscience. They are entirely irrelevant to someone with a disordered mind.
They have no interest in “society.” Their interest is strictly themselves. Society simply provides them with the means to fulfill their needs. And folks who forgo self interest in exchange for doing what’s best for society are simply “chumps” in their opinions.
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
Exactly. That is how psychopaths think; they are users, cheats, and they’re lazy. They’d rather just suck someone else dry than actually work. They’re like parasites.
But one of the reasons our society can function at all is that there aren’t many spaths. Their numbers are small, only 2% or 3% of the population, and yet they commit most of the crimes. However, if the number of psychopaths in the population increases, then our society, our culture, is doomed.
Its like an animal that develops too many parasites inside and outside its body, sucking it dry: the animal can’t remain healthy, can’t live very long if its infested with too many parasites.
That’s why psychopaths need to change, that’s my argument. Psychopaths need to change because its in their own selfish best interest: if the parasite kills its host, then the parasite dies too.
Sociopaths do not care! Simply because they do not let feelings interfere with their actions, they feel they are superior human beings. I.e. according to Robert Hare, not caring about others for example, allows them to hire and fire at will and thereby climb the business ladder to success. The same goes for a lot of politicians, “stars” and athletes such as Lance Armstrong, people in the financial world (Bernie Madoff), people in the legal professions, religious leaders etc….any professions which exert power and control.
Honestly, I am not at all surprised by this article and it’s author. I have had to deal with two sociopaths in my life and family. Both of them considered their behavior as totally normal and very intelligent just like the author of this article is saying. They were also very offended when the reality of their behavior is brought to their attention. I agree with what freedomfare says about the mad man saying he is not mad.
In my own experience, I have found that sociopaths live in delusion (in their own little world). They are intelligent monsters who leave a wake of destruction and put themselves on a pedestal for it (or play the victim of those that they have hurt), just like the author the author of this article.
So not surprised.
Dear Sociopath who will not change:
This website is for people who want to depart from the company from someone like you! Nobody smart sticks around and wants to be hit by the stupid stick by someone lacking moral integrity. Sorry, but you are pathetic and I would guess highly under educated. A sociopath is not just someone who is a serial rapist, murderer, thief, et cetera…but someone who is incapable of feeling empathy or sympathy for people they have wronged. They can pretend to…usually in court to get money or to stay out of prison!
A classic example is a woman who hears a report of a teenage girl being held at gunpoint, sadistically raped, and then made to beg for her life, and threatened by a societal termite he will kill her loved ones if she tells the police. A sociopathic woman would say, “You should have grabbed the gun and hit him over the head with it! What is wrong with you?!!!”
A sociopathic woman has sex with family members well into adulthood. A sociopathic woman sleeps with the significant others of every woman they know because they imagine it boosts their shallow confidence to act like an UNPAID hooker. A sociopathic woman will milk married and single men out of their life savings in some hair-brained scheme, because they are too lazy and stupid to get an education and make the money themselves! Sociopathic women will sleep with their own children and other people’s children, because they are reliving the abuse they experienced as a child and are too stingy and stupid to get help to clean out their junk in the trunk. Sorry but you sound like a greedy and sleazy fool in your article. Mark my words, you will grow old all by yourself. When people discover what you are made of, they drop tail and run like hell!
I don’t care how right or intelligent or whatever this loser thinks he is…..the reality of the matter is that they have to lie and manipulate people in order to have ANYone in their lives. They can’t wipe their own butts so they will do anything they possibly have to in order to get someone to do it for them. They can’t function in the real adult world as a real genuine human being and if they were hones about their intentions, thoughts, lack of feelings, beliefs, etc…etc…etc.. they would be shunned by all but the lowest of the low.
They live is a self created prison and the cost of being willing to do anything to anyone in order to obtain their short lived pleasures is to loose the ability to ever have anything real, long term or valuable. Mine substitutes this by living in his mommy basement at the age of 48!! Who wouldn’t want that?? LOL!!!! He can’t make a woman happy to save his life! But Mommy is sure proud of “His Highness”
He will “live” out the rest of his days with a bottle in one hand and his pee pee in the other, alone a prisoner of his own lies. You would think someone so frigging brilliant could have perfected SOME soil other than destroying women but alas, he has not.
BAHAHAHA! you just described my ex to a T!! except it’s his gf, not his mom he lives with(17 yrs younger than him). SHE doesn’t work either. Her dad supports them both as far as I know. He is also 48. What a catch! LOL but he seriously thinks he’s god’s gift to women….no car, no job, missing teeth, losing hair…looks like a crackhead. ummm, sorry buddy..NOT attractive in the least. not to mention extremely pathetic! hahaha! It’s amazing how they manage to convince people that ‘anything’ is not their fault.
ps. he looked 20 yrs younger when I fell for slimy ways…and had his hair, teeth, a job and a truck. lol
Yeah……the whole picture of Spathtardx is this…..married and divorced 4 times, 3 children, two may not even be his (according to the POS), Oh my, SO much to remember……Arrested and convicted for domestic violence (of course he was not honest with me about this, at least the REAL story), he’s an alcoholic , in bankruptcy, driving his dead father’s car on his mother’s insurance police, living like an adolescent in her basement and being taken care of by her because “Spathtard can’t live by himself……it destroys him”….he’s an alcoholic, chain smokes, balding, a pathological liar, parasitic user, bad actor, gives people the creeps, a pervert, more than likely “interested” in children and a real live psychopath.
But the guy who wrote this letter has somehow set himself aside from people who are as pathetic as Spathtardx………riiiiiiight……..
Sorry about the type-o’s……I couldn’t get the edit feature to work apparently.