ASK DR. LEEDOM: answers to your questions about sociopaths

Lovefraud is pleased to announce a new service for our readers—ASK DR. LEEDOM.

Liane J. Leedom, M.D., is a psychiatrist who knows exactly what it is like to be deceived by a sociopath. Even with the best training in psychiatry—USC, UCLA and Yale—she, herself, failed to recognize the symptoms. She married a sociopath, who is the father of her son.

Does she understand what you’re going through? You bet.

If you have a question for Dr. Leedom, send your question directly to her at [email protected] Your question will be posted on the Lovefraud Blog, along with her answer. Not only will it help you, it will help others who are recovering from a run-in with a sociopath. Please note: all questions are shared with Donna Andersen, author of

Community of healing

I am thrilled that Dr. Leedom has offered to answer questions from Lovefraud readers. I am also thrilled to see Lovefraud evolving into a community of healing.

So many of you are posting thoughtful comments, telling your stories, and responding to the stories of others. I am grateful to all of you. Many times as I read the comments, I am blown away by the insights and caring you express.

Based on the mail I receive, it seems Lovefraud is providing two big services: identifying the sociopathic/psychopathic personality disorder, and letting victims know that they are not alone. All of you are contributing to these services.

I thank Dr. Leedom and M. L. Gallagher for their enlightening posts. I thank all of you for your comments and readership.

Comment on this article

14 Comments on "ASK DR. LEEDOM: answers to your questions about sociopaths"

Notify of

meg, he isolated you, he cheats on you, lies to you, got you in the local papers to make you look like the crazy one… you are unhappy and you know in your heart this is not right. Read, read, read as many articles as you can here at LoveFraud, it doesn’t matter if he’s a sociopath or not (sounds like one) Knowledge = power. You are bonded to him and you need to detach yourself. It’s like an addiction. Don’t believe anything he says, he is a liar, manipulative, it’s all about him and what he wants, he might try to get you back again, they always have an agenda. It’s not normal.

Dear Meg,

He sounds to me like a socio/psychopath, but even if he isn’t, he is a liar and a cheat, and you just have to ask yourself “am I better off with a liar and a cheat for a partner?” I think the answer would be no.

First off multiple sexual partners (swinging and him cheating) opens you and him up for sexually transmitted diseases that cannot be cured and can lead to death and disability. Is it worth the risk?

Do you want your kids growing up in this atmosphere of hostility and lies and I imagine fighting?

Decide what you DESERVE and WANT and then insist on it. If he isn’t willing to provide that then kick him to the curb, and BTW since he is a liar, (we know that don’t we?) don’t believe a word he says when he begs to get back—so I’d START OUT by kicking HIM to the curb for sure!

kim, thanks for the response…he is away but has to come to c kids, well thats his excuse anyway. no i dont feel sorry for him anymore he definately has a problem

i was in same boat as u, keep goin bak, but this time i cant..for my own sanity, id b wondering wat hes up to next!

jus waitin to be rehoused so i can get awa once and for all,

hopeforjoy, thanks to for ur caring words, i am finding it hard to stay strong jus keep wondering y he done it then i get angry and argue with him.
as i said b4 when i am re housed i wont really hav to see him and then these feelings mite go away?

shabbychic, u are so right in that all he cares about is himself, im jus wondering did he ever care bout me or kids?
i realy do need to detatch, jus so hard in current situation, hopefully with time will become much easier. and ur so right hes not normal…i can see that now!!

ox drover..ur words ring true…my kids come first and its not fair on them and i think also i desrve better than a liar and a cheat…hes out of the house anyway..its just keepin him away that is difficult. i think if im strong enough to keep him out of my life he will finallty take the hint that im not takin him back once and for all!

thanx to all of u for ur support
will continue to post and update x


meg – nothing ‘normal’ about these ‘relationship problems.’ he’s a loser with a capital ‘L’ if nothing else.

don’t engage with him – don’t fight, don’t give him anything to vibe off of. just keep doing what you are doing, and get away from him. he may not go away easily..just deal with it a day at a time. you will gain strength. keep posting and asking for help.

take care.

Send this to a friend