A reader asked the following question this week:
Recently, I’ve started doing more research into sociopaths and have run into a condition with which I’m unfamiliar: dissociation. Do you know if sociopaths/psychopaths have been considered to have this disorder, or if it is part of what makes them who they are?
The term dissociation has two distinct meanings in psychology. These two uses of the same word do not necessarily reflect a similar process operating in each.
The first kind of dissociation is a response to stress, and peritraumatic dissociation (dissociation during a traumatic event) appears to be a risk factor for stress-related illness. Symptoms of this kind of dissociation include disturbed experience of reality related to time, memory and nearly every sensation. For example, during trauma, time may stand still and people report that things do not seem real. Male sex hormones or androgens (that women also have in lower levels) protect against this kind of dissociation. For a good but technical article about peritraumatic dissociation read, Symptoms of Dissociation in Humans Experiencing Acute, Uncontrollable Stress: A Prospective Investigation.
The second kind of dissociation relates to the observation that the mind is modular. That means we don’t use our entire brain circuitry all the time, and during different behavioral and emotional states, different circuits are activated. Testosterone is hypothesized to disrupt the connection between the cerebral cortex and the limbic system, and so enhances this kind of dissociation.
This increase in mind modularity has been related to sociopathy/psychopathy by some experts. In a previous blog I reviewed Psychopaths in Everyday Life, a book by Robert Rieber. There is a great quote from the book that relates to your question. It is,
The true psychopath compels the psychiatric observer to ask the perplexing and largely unanswered question: Why doesn’t that person have the common decency to go crazy?
So why don’t psychopaths have the common decency to go crazy? Dr. Rieber explains, “Since psychopaths act as if they were perfectly normal, i.e. sane, they must be skilled in a cunning manner to dissociate any real guilt that they should feel about their antisocial behavior.” He also says that since psychopaths dissociate, they don’t go crazy. He believes dissociation prevents them from experiencing guilt. He also says that many psychopaths do have some level of guilt they are dissociated from.
So there may be a connection between sociopathy/psychopathy and dissociation, but the connection depends on your definition of the word.
LTL,
My X-son-P used to tell me someone “gave” him things or “loaned” him things that he had STOLEN— so maybe these people didn’t KNOWINGLY GIVE him these things.
coming up with the “gift” or “loan” explination when the person they are showing them to knows they can’t AFFORD them is often a ruse that they use.
Yes Ox,
that is true too – but I also was there to witness the TV, The free vacations from friends, the “tagging along” as a “Friend” theme, always living “off” others… and so many women (me included) would “Fall in love” with him and shower him with our love and kindness including special “gifts” along the way. Some of these “males” just know how good loving kind women work – and they literally “bank” on that – and even their male friends seem to pull out all stops for them – hooking them up with jobs, etc…
He just never earned his way in life by working hard and giving back. Just taking and expecting…day after day after day….
Wish I had known you back then – you would have skillet-headed some sense into me 🙂
Dear LTL,
I couldn’t “skillet-head” any sense into MYSELF, what makes you think I could have pounded sense into your head!?
Each of us has to come into the wisdom of it all in our own time and manner, sometimes I just (now) tap someone to get their attention, but they have to do their own learning. I’m still learningn and falling and getting back up.l
autisticsouls–
Thanks for posting here and sharing the information that you posted. It’s been a long time since I’ve been here at LF, but I guess I needed the info. you put here. It will help me with my son. I am excited to read some more tomorrow at the sensory processing website.
Also, I needed/need to learn to “turn off” my empathy/sensitivity and found a teacher named Rose Rosetree who’s helped me some. You might like her, I don’t know
http://www.rose-rosetree.com/blog/
http://www.rose-rosetree.com/
Re physical mannerisms … they fall asleep and wake up instantly – no drowsy periods like a normal person – it’s like a machine switching on and off – this has been noticed by many people about them. They also frequently wake up in a sweat even when the weather isn’t warm (I have to wonder if their subconscious is processing the shitty things they do while asleep>>?)
They can have unusually thick hair – like three or four strands out of one follicle – my P ex had this – I had never seen anything like it in my life before.
I agree re noticing everything new. And that they are frequently given things. In the time I was with the P ex he never bought an item of clothing – I bought everything when he wasn’t with me. He just wouldn’t shop. I see that he is still being given things now. He also tried to get everything for free – always on some scheme so he could ‘claim back’ expenses for dubious items or conning his employer into supplying what he wanted.
Also look for quick changes in emotional states – t his is freaky the first time you see it. The P ex was one of the ones who faked being sensitive and self aware. He pretended to be devastated when I ended it and even forced tears. When I said I wasn’t buying it he snapped out of it in a second and said ‘Okay’ as though I had just said ‘Let;s go out to dinner’ and was in a cheerful mood in an instant. Normal people go through a spectrum of moods and states when upset and getting calmed down. Not him.
Lack of eye wrinkles – look out for someone who doesn’t look their age – particularly if they have no ‘crows feet’ when they smile. Yes some people are blessed with good genetics but this is not so in the psychopath / sociopath case – they have no eye wrinkles because their smiles are not genuine. Only one smile is genuine – the Duchenne smile and it causes the whole face to smile and the eyes to wrinkle at the sides – over time it leaves lines. Sociopaths smile fake smiles with their mouths only – hence no eye wrinkles.
Some will use their hands a lot when lying – they are literally moulding and creating reality so the hands are a physical sign of it.
Of course no single sign in isolation can help us identify in a definite sense = we have to look for patterns and constellations or clusters of signs in unison to see patterns.
Midlife, whenever you talk about your ex fulla, it reminds me of mine. In particular the falling asleep/waking up instantly. And the lack of wrinklage.
I don’t know why, but I was thinking today of the first emails me and him sent to each other on findsomeone. I had noticed that his spelling was good because (this is going to sound snobby..) I had the idea in my head that I would avoid guys who spell really badly. Although of course I hadn’t told him this as it would sound utterly snobby.
So guess what..turns out he can’t spell for sh*t, and he must have run every single email through spellchecker.
He also used the pity play in saying he lost most of his pals in the divorce, which couldn’t be further from the truth.
I actually came on here to have a big rant about how my ex is now using my son to build up his new partner while simultaneously dimishing me as a mother, which he also did with his girls to his ex-wife.
However, feeling much calmer just from reading blogs and getting a sense of other peoples backgrounds kind of puts things in perspective and re-affirms my resolve to be a calm secure loving and consistent base in my sons life.
Arohanui to you all
“Why doesn’t that person have the common decency to go crazy?”
LOL!!! Yes…actually laughed out loud!!!!! AMEN!
When I was in my mid-twenties my therapist told me, after meeting with her, that it would be easier to accept my mother for what she is if she were in an institution. That statement has stuck with me for the past fifteen years! I apply it frequently in my mind when I find myself questioning my son’s father’s mental health and how I personally ended up in a relationship with a sociopath!
Namaste
Duped
Dear Banana,
That is one of my favorite movies, it was also a great book. I sometimes refer to a psychopath as “he must have a painting in the closet” in reference to this story.
I never thought about it as connected to dissociation, but yea, it fits! Thanks!
I would like to share a recent example of dissosociation.
Recently there devistation is a city where I live. I was praying and feeling people pain at losing their lives. I felt so terrible and helpless becuz all I had to offer was peayer. Peoples lives will never be the same EVER.
Spath ,”Imagine all the money that must be flying around if a bank was hit. Imagine how much stuff can be taken becuz the major retail centers were blown down. He didnt feel anything for the victims & how if affected them. All he can think of is how he can get into the stores and/or homes and “”find”” something he wants. I asked him,remember when your truck was briken into and your sterio was stolen? He was angry. He said,yeah “”BUT”” this is a natural disaster why do the cops keep people from taking things their insurance is gonna pay for it all anyway. He said it is better for the things to be taken and used than to have it bulldozed and wasted.