I have spent the last 3 months very focused on finishing Women Who Love Psychopaths with Sandra L.Brown, M.A. this book is admitedly sexist in that it is for women who have had relationships with male sociopaths, psychopaths and pathological narcissists. The book has been tough for me to work on as I have had to relive many aspects of the short 17 months I spent with a sociopath. I am anxious to move on and produce a similar work for men, because I dislike the over emphasis on male sociopaths. I also have come to appreciate loving empathetic men, and believe we need to give these "real men" more recognition and visibility. Three events with the above theme have touched me recently. First, …
Why are there so many sociopaths in America?
This semester I am teaching Psychology of Women at the University of Bridgeport. This is the second time I have taught this course. It is a fun course to teach because everyone likes it. This week we took up the issue of whether overall women's personalities are different from men's. A significant percentage of the class believes that men and women are very different in many domains and that this difference is biologic or genetic. The author of our textbook is a feminist from New York so she tends to down play any gender differences found, and she attributes nearly all gender differences to culture. To balance the views of the textbook, I look for other articles to share with the class. …
Political Ponerology: An idea for our times
"Whether you know it or not, each and every day your life is touched by the effects of psychopathy on our world. You are about to learn that even if there isn't much we can do about geological and cosmological catastrophe, there is a lot we can do about social and Macrosocial evil, and the very first thing to do is to learn about it. In the case of psychopathy and its effects on our world, what you don't know definitely can and will hurt you." (p. 9, Political Ponerology) One thing I like about teaching at a University is that I am exposed to a lot of new ideas. Also I am not one who has to agree with everything a person says, to appreciate the good ideas he/she has. With that thought, I …
Valentine’s Day can be tough for victims of love fraud
As a victim of love fraud, I have two reactions to Valentine's Day. First, I hate the thought of all those sociopaths out there male and female, who are using this day to lock in their next victims. Early in relationships, sociopaths present themselves as great partners. They certainly don't pass up the chance to pour on the charm on a day like Valentine's Day. Furthermore, since they can be very focused on sex, Valentine's Day is an opportunity for them to score. My vision of Valentine sociopaths includes those who are simultaneously wooing more than one victim. Perhaps we should consider whether Valentine's Day should also be named “Love Fraud Awareness Day.” My second reaction to Val …
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Retired racers, PTSD and depression
In the beginning of January, our family took in a foster child. This boy is a 3-year-old retired racing greyhound. His behavior over the last 6 weeks has reminded me of my own journey of healing and teaches us about the biologic nature of psychological symptoms. There is no doubt that this poor boy suffers from PTSD. Furthermore, the PTSD has caused depression and has prevented him from being able to enjoy his life. As part of a conscious program to teach empathy and caretaking to the children, we've fostered many dogs over the last 4 years. Although each dog had a sad story to tell, none came with the combination of symptoms Mr. Goodstuff suffered. I have never seen a dog as fearful …
Aristotle: Sociopath or Machiavellian?
This week, I am departing from the usual and sharing an essay written by someone else. My daughter turned 17 this week and is applying to start college early. I have often felt sorry for her because she has had to endure my pontificating on the nature of humanness. As part of her application she was asked to comment on a quote from Aristotle. I was shocked at the level of insight she had into the implications of the quote. I was mostly surprised that her response indicates she does indeed listen when I speak! She wrote this essay without any help from me. It sounds like Aristotle was rather like a sociopath, or in the very least, like a Machiavellian in his views. I'll let you …
Questions that best identify sociopathy in a person
It really bothers me that researchers haven't developed a measure to help people figure out if their loved ones are sociopathic. Instead, measures have been developed and the public is told NOT to use them to “diagnose” anyone. What good is research if it doesn't teach people how to protect themselves? It would not be too difficult to identify a group of sociopaths, then determine a few easy questions related to the disorder most of the sociopaths answer yes or no to (that is sensitivity). The questions would be even better if non-sociopaths were unlikely to give the same response (that is specificity). In a recent study (Comp. Psych. 48, 529), Dr. Heather Gelhorn and her colleagues from th …
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ASK DR. LEEDOM: Are sociopaths (and psychopaths) vindictive?
A woman who married and had children with two different sociopathic men wrote us this week. Her story and questions are timely since they allow me to mention another upcoming book, the conference Donna and I attended last weekend and to discuss vindictiveness. It seems most women who have children with sociopaths end up with the sociopaths walking out on their children as well as the women, leaving the survivors to mop up and struggle to understand what happened on their own. From what I understand of sociopaths, the prevalent attitude they seem to behave as if they "don't care" about anything except doing what benefits them”¦ (she told her story of marriage, children, custody battles and …
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ASK DR. LEEDOM: Are there psychological tactics for dealing with a psychopath?
I received this question from a woman who is divorcing a man she believes has the traits of a psychopath (according to the psychopathy checklist): “What psychological tactics can you suggest in dealing with a psychopath? There must be some tools and strategies to stay a step ahead. I've read books on identifying liars and tried to educate myself on strengthening my position in recognizing The Predator. There has to be some guidelines somewhere on How to Ride That Horse. I have had hundreds of horses throughout my life and pride myself on being able to ride anyone that crosses my path. Although this horse has been the most difficult and I continue to be dragged, trampled and kicked, I c …
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Nothing says “I’m sexy” like an automatic weapon
Allow me to introduce the "Babe" who could be Drew Peterson's next wife. She is Kumari Fulbright, a young lady who participated in the Miss Arizona pageant as Miss Pima County in 2005, and Miss Desert Sun in 2006, who also reportedly serves as a law clerk for U.S. District Judge Raner Collins. Here, she is pictured as Miss May in a calendar for Subguns.com (www.title2media.com, photo used with permission). See ABC News for the complete story. But Drew Peterson and the rest of you guys had better watch out because sweet little Kumari "is accused, along with three men, of tying up her 24-year-old ex-boyfriend with plastic cable and duct tape, and holding him captive for hours in two …