Today I would like to reach out to everyone here on this site. I have been deeply touched by your comments and on-going conversations, and I feel so much of the pain and confusion that many of you are still experiencing. Your stories resonate so strongly with me on numerous levels — because I've been there too. I know how it feels. I ache for each and every one of you who is currently going through the heartbreak and insanity. And I'm here to tell you, today, that it WILL get better. You WILL come through — particularly with the help and support of sites like this — and there WILL come a time when you can look back at where you are now, recognize all you have achieved and give yourself a huge …
It Must Be Me…
Thank you so much for all the kind comments following my last post”¦ I'm glad that people are able to connect with what I am saying. It brings me great joy to feel part of this community — thank you for welcoming me so warmly. This week I have decided to write about something that I've been discussing over the past couple of days with my great friend Beatrix, who was also married to a charming sociopath. She is, of course, part of the sister and brotherhood who've been there seen it and got the T-shirt. We've known each other for many years, and our conversations, quite naturally, often focus on our experiences and subsequent education about personality disorders. So last night we were dis …
To The Sociopath – A Message Of Defiance
There are so many inspiring posts and true stories that are shared here on this forum, and I thought I'd like to share with you an open message that I sent to my ex when I discovered he had been reading my blog. For me, it was another of those defining moments. I had a choice, you see. My habitual response would have been to shut down, keep quiet and stop sharing my journey with the world. The knowledge that he once again had access to my inner thoughts instantly brought back the familiar feelings of fear and uncertainty — together with the still haunting shame that I'd fallen so heavily for his poisonous charms. The fact that, despite my love, he had systematically stripped me of everything …
Breaking The Silence
I am loving the honesty, support and wisdom shared by members of this community - and I feel deeply honoured to be here. Lovefraud is such a safe place, such a help to all of us whose lives have been touched by a sociopath. And your comments have inspired me to write about something I call the ”˜code of silence' this week. Something that, in my experience, exists among so many of us who have experienced abuse. Let's make no bones about it - escaping from a controlling or abusive relationship is difficult enough. Accepting the truth that you've been treated so badly is even harder. But having to explain what happened to other people is excruciatingly humiliating. Particularly when they wi …
It’s Not About The Sociopath – It Never Has Been
Thank you. My last post seems to have stirred up some strong emotions. Then again I guess that's my responsibility as a writer — to reach people and get the feelings going. Movement, after all, is surely the only way we can go forward? At the same time, my intent is to stir positive responses, so I decided that this week it would be a good idea to share a bit about the methods I've been using to help with my own healing. I recognise that for some the following article may be a bit tricky to digest - which is why I thought long and hard before deciding to post. I remember when I first discovered that everything I had believed in was just a lie, I was far too raw to ever have been able to c …
“So You’re Telling Me That My Husband Is A Sociopath?” The Night I Made A Deal With Dr Hannibal Lecter
So, what happens when you suddenly discover that the person who has been sharing your life is actually a stranger? Worse than that, they turn out to be a person who has deliberately deceived and manipulated you with surgeon-like precision. Wrapping you in a web of deceit — delivered so skillfully and carefully that you've welcomed the silken threads as they tighten around you. Freely allowing yourself to be wrapped in the cocoon being made by your soul mate. It's only once you have morphed in to an emotional mush of confusion and fear that you realize you are trapped. And by then, of course, it's too late — and your mate is off to the next willing victim. I know, of course, that so many of …
“I won’t let you fall” Five Words And The Hand Of Friendship
First of all I would like to say a big hello to all of you here on Lovefraud. This site has been a huge help to me over the past two years. The two years since I discovered that my marriage to a man I had freely referred to as my soul mate had in actual fact been a decade of manipulation and deception at the hands of a man I now believe to be a sociopath. Reading experiences and stories from other people here on this site, I came to recognize that my situation was far from unique. I was both appalled and also relieved to find that I was not alone. That there are thousands of people (mainly women, like me) who have been duped and betrayed in the cruelest of ways. I have been working on …
“I won’t let you fall” Five Words And The Hand Of FriendshipRead More