Seduced by a sociopath

UPDATED FOR 2022. Yes, you can protect yourself from sociopaths. You can stop them from coming into your life and causing serious damage. I'm going to tell you how to do it in three easy steps: Step 1 — Know that sociopaths exist Millions of sociopaths live among us. I am not exaggerating that number. I use the word "sociopath" as an umbrella term for four serious personality disorders. They are: Antisocial personality disorder /psychopathy Narcissistic personality disorder Borderline personality disorder Histrionic personality disorder Although there are clinical differences among these disorders, there are many similarities. People who have these disorders are usually …

How to protect yourself from sociopaths in 3 easy stepsRead More

UPDATED FOR 2022. Psychopaths will never stop cheating. If you suspect that your partner is disordered, and you're experiencing any of the following, beware: Do you have absolute proof that your partner is cheating but he or she denies it? When you confront your partner about cheating, does he or she say it's your fault? Does your partner pick a fight with you, and use the fight as an excuse to storm out of the house and see someone else? If you answer yes to these questions, you may be involved with a psychopath — for more warning signs, get the exclusive Lovefraud checklist. If your partner checks a lot of the boxes on the checklist, know this: There's nothing you can do, or …

4 reasons why psychopaths will never stop cheatingRead More

[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/P_6vDLq64gE" title="How%20to%20spot%20a%20liar"] UPDATED FOR 2022: How to Spot a Liar that's the title of TED talk by Pamela Meyer, author of the book, Liespotting. A Lovefraud reader sent me a link to the video. It's a good starting point for a discussion of the question, why do psychopaths lie? How to Spot a Liar, on HuffingtonPost.com. In my opinion, the tips and techniques that she suggests in the video are helpful if you're dealing with normal people. I'm not sure how useful they are when you're dealing with psychopaths. Meyer does point out that people who think liars look away and don't make eye contact are mistaken. The research, Meyer …

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UPDATED FOR 2022. One of the hardest parts of ending a romantic involvement with a psychopath is accepting the fact that to the psychopath, the relationship meant nothing. In the beginning, when the psychopath pursued you, showered you with attention and affection, called and texted all day long — it was just seduction. When the psychopath proclaimed undying love, declared that you were the best thing to ever happen to him or her, pushed the relationship along while painting a glistening image of the future — it was all to hook you before you escaped. When the rough patches came and you were ready to walk away, and the psychopath pleaded, cajoled, promised to change or even thr …

To the psychopath, the relationship meant nothingRead More

UPDATED FOR 2022. If you're reading Lovefraud, it's probably because you suspect that your partner is disordered and you've been staying with a sociopath. This person's behavior has baffled you: How can he lie so prolifically? How can she be so cold? How can anyone behave so horribly and then act as if nothing happened? So you went looking on the Internet for answers. You've plugged this person's upsetting behavior into your favorite search engine and come across a list of traits such as Lovefraud's Key Symptoms of a Sociopath. Check, check, check — the person exhibits all or most of them. So what do you do now? The correct answer is to get the person out of your life as quickly a …

6 really bad reasons for staying with the sociopathRead More

UPDATED FOR 2022: When Lovefraud readers ask me for personal consultations, it's because someone in their lives usually a romantic partner acts in ways that they simply cannot understand. The readers describe an unfathomable mixture of affection, attention, contradictions, deception, blaming and rage. It makes no sense and it's behavior that they've never seen before. So imagine the readers' surprise when I say, “Yeah, they all do that.” It's true. Sociopaths all seem to engage in the same abusive behaviors. Recognizing physical and sexual abuse is straightforward enough. You may also be aware of psychological and emotional abuse. But if you're involved with a sociopath, you may als …

11 abusive behaviors you’re likely to see from sociopathic partnersRead More

UPDATED FOR 2021. Lovefraud once posted the story of "Billyjean" in an article called Alone. Exhausted. Lonely. Stressed. Stuck. She described how she felt like there was no escape from the sociopath. The headline pretty much sums up Billyjean's position. This single mom had thought she found a man who loved her. She married him, became pregnant and discovered he was cheating on her. Now Billyjean has a baby, no family support, and can't afford to leave. Plus, although her ex doesn't want to be with her, he also doesn't want to divorce her. He provides some financial support, and therefore feels entitled to show up at Billyjean's apartment whenever he wants, supposedly to see the child …

When there seems to be no escape from the sociopath …Read More

UPDATED FOR 2021. Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Suzette." She can't understand why sociopaths say they want love, when their behavior is not at all loving. It's strange, my brother (who I have no doubt in my mind is a sociopath), craves being loved. He bounces from relationship to relationship, using his girlfriends. Yet when he screws up, and has his girlfriend threaten to leave him, he acts so desperate! Desperate for human connection.  He tells me that he can't live without love in his life, and that he NEEDS a girlfriend by his side. I don't understand this. He's a drug addict, and he uses his girlfriends for support - and before he had any …

Sociopaths say they want love, but what they really want is supplyRead More