By | September 28, 2007 28 Comments

Guys: Watch out for women con artists!

There are a few things we can be absolutely sure of when it comes to con artists who are all sociopaths/ psychopaths. The first is that they will take advantage of loop holes in the legal system. We have received several letters from men in that last few months detailing the lengths psychopathic women will go to in order to extort money from men.

You see, in most states, if there is a separation or divorce custody of children is handed to mothers. She who gets the kids, gets money. Professional mother is the perfect occupation for a female psychopath. All she has to do is have sex, get pregnant, and she’s got it made! For her, kids aren’t a liability; they are an asset she can use in the next con.

Mothers get custody even when they are substance abusing sociopaths. It is very difficult to prove a mother is unfit. Furthermore, custody evaluators take information from both parties at face value and fail to verify the information. This is the ideal set up for psychopaths, who are all pathologic liars. Check out these two terrible stories:

I’m currently in a custody battle with a woman I believe to be a sociopath. Very frustrated with the evaluator on my case, who after telling me that “unlike this biased state (Utah) that she starts out at 50/50”. Has submitted a report suggesting 50/50 custody. I’ve been able to establish documented emotional abuse my ex put me and her other children through with fake cancer and pregnancy. She even lied to the evaluator about being a ex-police officer and failed a drug test. I thought the psychologist had figured it out when she started asking me questions more relevant to a PCL than parenting, i.e., sex drive etc. I’m afraid she’s repeating a thought she asked me after establishing the lies about cancer and pregnancy. “OK she’s a liar; does that make her a bad parent?” (Replace sociopath with liar.) She doesn’t get it. I wish I could find the reference in which someone stated, “Ever met a sociopath that was a good parent”?

Next story

I have a serious problem in my family. My son is divorced from a sociopath female who has not been diagnosed but fits the description with amazing accuracy. She also fits borderline personality disorder. Unfortunately, she is high-functioning and clever. With relentless aggressive court action, she has managed to get 3 custody evaluations to play out. The first two resulted in joint custody but the 3rd one, which was just completed about 6 weeks ago, resulted in her getting “sole” custody. Now this is after the 2 children, ages 14 and 11, had stated their wishes to their own attorney, stating that they both wished to live with their father. How did this happen? I’ll tell you. This mother lied so much and had somehow convinced the guardian-ad-litem (GAL) to advocate for her. This GAL believed all the mother said and used her power to convince the judge that the children should be totally with their mother for the kids’ best interests. The judge was swayed by her, and even though my son’s attorney uncovered in the hearing that the GAL did not check her facts and had gotten her information only from the mother, the judge did not care! This female judge awarded the mother full custody against the children’s wishes and my son, who has never had a parenting issue and who has been the reliable loving parent for 14 years, performing most of the primary functions, has now been reduced to “visitor” and is paying hefty child support payments.

What can we learn from these stories? First, female psychopaths exploit the anti-male bias in our family courts. On the opposite side of the coin, psychopathic fathers also claim to be the “victims” of anti-male bias.

Another lesson is: Men, use protection, even when women tell you they are “on the pill” or have been sterilized. Better yet, be absolutely sure of the character of all women with whom you are intimate.

The last lesson is that there are no studies investigating the impact of trait psychopathy on parenting. Yes, I said NO studies. You see, psychiatrists and psychologists all assume that sociopaths/psychopaths don’t form attachments and so disengage. No scientist seems to understand that sociopaths/psychopaths do form attachments. It is just that these attachments are power-based rather than affection-based. No one is looking at parenting, because everyone assumes sociopaths/psychopaths do not take on parenting roles. Nothing could be further from the truth. My prayer is that some researchers read our blogs and will hear us. Psychopathic parents are an enormous problem. They are a problem because they stay, not because they abandon.

If you are a loving father that has been victimized by a psychopath and the family courts, I feel your sense of powerlessness to protect your kids. The only solution I can suggest is perhaps filing complaints against attorneys and mental health evaluators, who fail to verify “facts.” People who give legal testimony that is false may be committing perjury. All complaints have to be investigated by the licensing boards. Furthermore, a successful malpractice case against a GAL or therapist would be a wake up call to the entire system. I would also encourage all parents to keep careful records. Children who were handed over to psychopaths may be able to take action against the courts themselves once they become adults.

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I married what seems to fit the bill of a sociopath.

This is a historical time line of what I know about her and what she has done.

Her mother and father divorce while she is still young. The next day her mother has another man in the house The Woman said it was awkward and she remembers this new man suddenly appearing in her home when she was around 6 yrs old or so.

Am told she is raped by a (boyfriend) at age 17
because of the rape she has a child her first daughter.
She trys to find the father and make him pay child support

Mother kicks her out of home calls her a whore
She finds another guy who feels bad for her and lets her stay at his parents place.
Parents dont like the fact an unwed mother is living in their home or in a car so the boy eventually marrys her.
They have two children together also both girls she now has three girls.
After many years HE divorces HER.
She gets child support from this guy.
Then hurts wrist at workplace and gets 30,000 dollar workmans comp case.
Moves many times due to children having run ins with juvenile justice and family and child services being called on them. Wild partys, dirty living conditions, mother working and no one home with kids.

She lives with several different men over a period of time and moves in with one we will call guy#3. After sometime and seeing how bad the children are and how bad she is Guy#3 kicks her out and goes back to his exwife.
The exwife and guy#3 have to get a restraining order as her and the girls stalk and destroy property of guy#3’s.
Stalking charges are brought against her and girls in Fla.

Her mother dies her stepfather gives her nothing from the will and sells off her mothers belongings in a yard sale or gives other stuff of value to his children.

She files another hurt wrist workmans comp case against employer #2 and wins 20,000 dollars.
Moves several more times around.
Is evicted at least once on file with court.
Trashes house where they were renting and partial barn and house where they live mysteriously burns down the day they move out leaving the renter with a broken down house he has to bulldoze down because of the smell of dog crap and trash and food in the house whats left of it.

Marries guy #4 moves to georgia thinking she is getting a new start for her and the girls.

Guy #4 finds drugs in the youngest daughters room and confronts her about it wife says he is snooping stay out of her daughters room. Guy#4 is appalled that woman cant see what he did was a good thing removing drugs from her daughters room.
Guy #4 continues to find liquor bottles and drug paraphernalia on property behind youngest daughters room and under her deck where there had been none previously before them moving in.
Guy#4 divorces woman and daughters.
Woman and daughters then destroy and tear up the house and steal all the appliances in the house.
The house was fully furnished and in excellent condition before they moved in. The house was owned by guy#4’s mother and father.
Woman and daughters do over 17,000 dollars worth of damage to home and steal over 10,000 dollars worth of furniture and appliances.
Because of where woman worked she could print out receipts for appliances since she worked in an appliance store. So could not prove she stole them.
Woman also got credit cards in guy#4’s name and ran up over 25,000 dollars in debt.
Guy#4 later finds a post office box opened in his name and credit card bills in his name he knew nothing about after doing a credit check on himself.

They move yet again leaving another house destroyed.

Two daughters are caught stealing lawnmower and lawnmower gets returned to original owner. Not prosecuted since minors.
Family and Child services respond to home because of possible meth lab in house.
Girls are given drug test and fail for extacy and pot found in their systems. Woman refuses to take drug test.

Credit Card theft occurs to mother of guy#4 police track it back to womans computer and ip address. No charges brought by D.A. since the charges didnt go thru the credit card and nothing was stolen.

Employer catches woman stealing doing illegal returns and credits on her account which cost over 5,000 dollars. Has her arrested and files felony charges against her.

Woman puts in for employment at insurance company but fails drug test and refused employment.

Woman finds work at new place. Not there but a few months and files workmans comp case for hurt wrist and receives large settlement.
New guy moves in with her and she steals his bank account information off his check book uses that to pay her bills online electronically.
While still receiving workmans comp checks from last place she finds new employment somewhere else.
She is late night manager and doesnt take money to bank that night. Instead she tells police a wild story which they dont believe about how she was robbed and where all they drove to. She was relieved of 2,500 dollars. Byron police follow her after the report and arrest her again later for suspended license in Fla while trying to clear up the suspicious theft of money which they say she stole.

After that she moves again and trashes that house. pays last months rent on a closed account and packs up and moves in middle of night.
Has written multiple bad checks all over here and there all this time and collection agencys are calling guy#4 house since that is the address and phne number she gives them as her living place.
Bank of America closes her account.
Now starts using her middle daughters name to get credit cards and checking acccounts opened.

Moves into new place and within months it is trashed and moves to yet another location
Last location she moves in man is arrested for meth lab and stolen property they continue to live there. Then gets job at new employer. works in deli (she was arrested for stealing from a meat department in fla) but i guess they dont do background checks at any of these places.
Arrested there for the employere who she stole 5,000 dollars from finally goes to court. She spends several months in jail there and now is in a bootcamp for 60-120 days where she will stay and then must pay back over time the 5,000 dollars and on probation for over 6 years.
She is also contempt of court for numerous offenses to guy#4.

This is my opinion here.
This woman has had traumatic experiences with men most of her life. From an early age or her parents divorcing to another man taking her fathers place in her life. To a rape and child by one guy to marriage of another guy at a young age. Having two children by a guy and then divorced. Moving from place to place and man to man to find one named Jay who she moved in with and then was thrown out her and her children with all her belongings thrown out into the street and him to return to his ex wife. The rejection from her step father and her mother dieing. The trashing of one persons home in Florida. Her father never seeing her children until the marriage of the woman and guy#4. The divorced by guy#4 for not controlling her children and the drug and alcohol abuse. The Trashing of one home owned by yet another guy in Byron berlyn drive.

It is my opinion that the woman has a true embedded hatred for Men in general. She is unable to trust male figures in her life as she has been hurt in some form or another by men all her life. She feels by trashing lying and stealing from them and about them that she is the better person. By putting them down trashing them and lying about them she is able to push them away before they hurt her.

By the way I am guy#4


KUDOS! Liane.

Ya hit the ball outta the park with this one!

Since sociopathy is escalating as our country & our culture deteriorate; moreover, since most sociopaths use their intellect rather than brute force. And, as the courts across our land empower females, it is the female of the sociopathic species than is far more dangerous.

And why shouldn’t it be?

Females in many other species are far more dangerous than the males.

However, it is far more difficult IMO to detect any sociopath when they are perpetrating a lovefraud and when one is the victim, it is darn near impossible.

As society & a sense of community deteriorates and we see living as “loners” [alone, isolated] becoming more prevalent, it is easier for these predators to pick off their prey from those wandering from the herd.

Had I listened to others and taken my time and not been in such a rush, I might have avoided the catastrophe of my life. However, I did not. Nonetheless, thank God they were there when I was ready to hear them. Even at that, it took eons to let it settle in and finally come to understand exactly what had happened and what the sociopath was about.

However, in another instance, I did listen to others and another woman in the tiny community in which I worked finally got firm in her approach to me warning me against dating her adopted sister! And I needed that warning and I am ever so grateful that she was firm and direct with me as I was so stupidly enamored and attracted that I was locked on target.

She told me that she didn’t think it was a good idea to date her adopted sister because her sister had a daughter by one man and nailed him for $1500 a month in non-taxable [to her] child support. This woman met another man who impregnated her and wanted to marry her and would have been a perfect father for her daughter, but she wouldn’t marry him.

Rather, she stated that since she got $1500 from the first guy and since this fellow was worth even more, she wanted to see how much she could get out of this second fellow and see how much the judge was going to giver her.

Furthermore, she used her child support to buy expensive jewelry for herself and did not take good care of her daughter; she wouldn’t buy her much in the way of clothing. AND her weight varied a lot and she was known to use a little cocaine every now and then.

It was a real nightmare. And I am so glad I had been warned because child number three would have been on me and she’d have hit me for as much money as she could convince the judge to give her AND break my heart just like she did to the second man who was the father of her son and wanted to marry her.

What saved me? Living in a community the rich attachments one can form in a small place are such that one gets warned. We don’t have that today and the prevalent lifestyle of forever remaining an adolescence negates a mature life with all of the moral supports and the early warning systems that others bring to one’s life.

Living with a sense of community in which others watch out for you and you act likewise in their best interests may be the Number One Defense against being had be a lovefraud sociopath, be it male or female. However, I think that females have the upper hand in this as women tend to read men and relationships better than men do.

As a male I can say, always form friendships with women who care enough for you to warn you about other women who aren’t quite right. Perhaps a real friend who is a woman can read those murky waters before you get so close you feel compelled to dive in.

Friends & community can be an early warning system. Don’t go it alone. Even spouse abusers separate their victim from the pack, from the herd, from the community, from their friends and family. Use the “buddy system.”

This is the advantage of this website. You are not alone and you can see others who are far ahead in their rebuilding and resiliency. I can’t wait to get to the place ML is! She’s way ahead of me, and she’s one of my heroines on this site.

And you Liane, Dr. Leedom, just keep busting more new ground. I concede that my experience has rendered me somewhat reactive and at times I have felt hobbled by it. Nonetheless, you keep exploring new areas and testing new waters. And all this is going to lead somewhere:

You see, the last great horizons and uncharted territory in psychology & psychiatry are in sociopathy, psychopathy and anti-social personality disorders.

For the tragic story of a British man trying to save his children from his con artist ex-wife, see:


This can go both ways with the kids, though I’m sure women are more likely to use this ploy. But I heard about a guy who took women for money & items all the time, and used his children as BAIT for other women. He would hand the women a sob story about their children needing this or that. He got one woman to buy him a car, another bought him & his kids a computer, another clothes… And after he unceremoniously dumped the woman who bought him the car, he told everyone she was a psycho and that they never had a relationship at all. He lied to people telling them he bought the car himself. And she was emotionally unstable with a mental illness, and angry about what happened, so it was easy for people to believe his calmly calculated lies. The icing on the cake was that after all this, he turned around, played on her sympathy to try and get her to host Christmas for his kids, and buy them their Christmas presents. And she nearly fell for it. “Because of the kids”. He used those kids ruthlessly.

I also know of a guy who hated paying child support, so he tried to go for custody so he wouldn’t have to pay child support, and his ex would have to pay him. His basis for asking for custody – the mother let the children be late to school 4 times in a month. Of course he didn’t tell the court that it was because he was at the mother’s house late at night insisting on arguing with her a few times a week! And maybe that’s why the kids were late a few mornings! He also said he “could not date” while he was going for custody – so instead he went out to bars and picked up one night stands. Because the court would have a harder time proving parental unfitness from that. You see his idea of “dating” was moving the new woman in with him 24/7, and that would look bad going for custody. So one night stands are more in line with parental fitness I guess. But nothing changes the fact that the ONLY reason he was going for custody was because he HATED the child support payments, and openly admitted he really resented having to pay his ex anything, even if it was for the kids.

At any rate, my point being is that ANY sociopath of either gender will use children the same way they use other adults, ruthlessly & without a thought. They’re simply tools.


A little less than 2 years ago, at the age of 24, I came across a brilliant reserved and conniving sociopath my own age abroad. He was one of a kind in my life. I had the adventure of a lifetime with him and did things that were crazy and obscure. I am screwed as a result and have lost many things and to this day I don’t know what happened to him. He was sought out by many but never caught but the last I heard was that he tried to get asylum in Europe and was denied but was deported to another country where people of his ethnicity reside in. He is a Kurd from Iran. I heard he is in Iraq but I do not know if I am learning the truth. His name and identity were given to the international police. Can someone help me out? I have no way of going back to my home country at least not anytime soon? I face serious charges because he forged my signature on some paper saying we are partners in crime and I never intended to get anything from him. How am I able to prove that I didn’t steal money? Is there a sociopathic gene that makes people this way or what is it? Do they have absolutely no feeling for others whatsoever? What kinds of humans are these?


I am here to tell you females are the worst………they are more cunning, more slick than any male I’ve ever met. My step daughter is a testament to that. She has the men in her life totally under her spell. I have been married to her father for 30 years. She is now 33, and has 2 children. She sought out to marry the sweetest, kindest young man available in our small town. She has succeeded in destroying him. She cheats on him, uses him, plays mind games with him, and just when you thought he was going to wise up and leave her, she comes up pregnant ! No surprise there ! She thought she was about to loose her meal ticket. She goes from one job to the next, cannot get along with anyone, especially other females, and of course it is always their fault. She has her father so tightly wrapped that he cannot see the true her. Just this past weekend she came to my house (she KNEW I was not home at the time) and tried to plant little evil seeds of strife against me to her father..He actually told me about it. But then this weekend she will be at our home having Easter dinner with us and acting all syrupy sweet to everyone. I literally doubt my own sanity after having to deal with her antics for 30 years. I am begging all the men out there…..please be careful …I have witnessed the very destruction of my precious son in law from the inside out. He is a shell of the man he used to be. She has reduced this fine young Marine to a detached zombie. He is like a lamb being led to slaughter, and he goes willingly. He knows should he even try to leave her again that his life will be even worse than it is now. He knows she will use the children against him, she will stalk him and torment him. He would NEVER be able to be free to love again. So he has pitifully resigned himself that this is his life, and I think he has lost all hope. He doesn’t reach out for help, because he knows then she would go after that person. I wish there was a way to outsmart her, but in 30 years, I haven’t found it. She is like an infection that you just can’t shake. God Bless all the young men out there involved with these snakes. You are forever in my prayers.


It doesn’t matter what sex they are, sociopaths are insidious, toxic, and dangerous.

And yes, the women are just as bad as the men…and much more effective when it comes to the crocodile tears.

I believe the one point that is not even being acknowledged in today’s society, and NEEDS to be stressed is that sociopaths/narcissists are unfit parents and should NOT be around children….not theirs, or anyone else’s.

One of the hallmark traits of anti-social personality disorder is the reckless disregard for the rights/safety of others.
This has devastating effects on innocent children who are trusting their mother and father to love them and keep them safe.

How can a child be loved when the parent is unable to love?
How can a child bond with their mother or father when the mother/father is unable to form emotional attachments to others?
How can a child grow up to be emotionally heathy and morally responsible, when the emotional maturity of the parent is that of a 2 year-old?
What are the effects on a child when that child has to carry the burden of the parent’s personality disorder throughout their childhood?
What happens to children when they grow up in an environment constantly being told that they are “bad” or “embarrassing” and everything that happens is their fault?

The most disgusting part of all of this is that psychopaths (both men and women) are excellent at “portraying” themselves as stellar parents to society.

For example, right after the Christmas break, my brother’s wife managed to manipulate the teachers at her daughter’s school to set up a special reading program for her daughter, because she is so “advanced” at reading. And, my sister-in-law did not want her “gifted” daugher to become BORED in school. The school obliged.

What the school doesn’t know is that the sister-in-law has been shoving books in this child’s face since she was two years old, telling her to read… the point of child abuse. She was forcing her to read when it was not even possible for the child to reach those expectations. All of this is because the sister-in-law wants to be seen as this great mother who’s child is “special”, “unique”, and a little better than the rest of the kids in the class.

What the school doesn’t understand is that this has nothing to do with the child. This is a narcissistic mother trying to make HERSELF look good.

I would suggest that another red flag of psychopathy might be when a parent touts themselves as a good parent, and lays it on a little too thick. People can tell if you are a good parent. You should not have to be running a constant PR campaign for yourself to prove your worth as a parent.

Also, psychopathic parents may have a habit of covertly smearing the other parent, with innuendo and malicious implications. Of course, no one actually sees this happening.
It’s clean violence.
The parents who are a little too domineering and too involved in their child’s school….to the point where the child is not allowed any autonomy, are just as suspect as the parents who are not paying enough attention, in my opinion.

If I were a teacher in the school system, I would watch for these things.

~And I feel equally sorry for the innocent parents who are stuck with the con artist children. It goes both ways, unfortunately.


Rosa – i sometimes wonder exactly what story my dad tells his cronies about me. i can just hear the tone of voice tho.

he always had this thing – if i go thousands of miles away and do something exotic he is all over that like white on rice – but here, 20 minutes away, suffering with ill health and no money (and he OWES me a whack) he doesn’t try to help or inquire or anything.

i didn’t start travelling a lot and doing exotic things until later in life and it took a while for me to see the pattern in his behavior, but i still didn’t understand it. think i do now.

when i was a kid he used to love it when my sib and i did unusual things that were contrary to our gender roles…AND he would slag women in general…took me a long time to own being female, and not be some sort of people pleasing neuter.

i loved that man feicely. could never understand why he didn’t want my love. guess that wasn’t what he was after. big on loyalty and appearances and sacrifice (mine) – guess that makes me supply.

he cannot stand my standing up to him – sends him into a complete tizzy. i am nc with him since november. right after the spath. it’s very uncomfortable. i want to see my mom and i can’t unless i go through him in some way – and i am just not going to do that right now.

i am signed on to most of the major property he owns. i am hoping that i will be able to use that as leverage. if he wants to sell, he needs to sign an agreeement to pay me a lump sum of what he owes me. mmmm, i love being on this site – EB, if you are out there, i wanna tell you how much your constant eye on strategy helps me! ‘Cause i have been nice and acted with a fair amount of integrity with my dad and it means and has gotten me SFA. so, now, a strategy! I can leverage signing off on him selling on of the houses i am sure he wants to sell soon, into some of the money he owes me, AND getting my field put into my name. Oh glory day!

wow, this post started off kinda sad and went someplace kinda good. 🙂



How was this property aquired?
I’m not clear on the situation….I’ve read about your hopes for the land….
and your on the title? With him/who?
Is this in a trust?

I need more info.


OMG Rosa, you just described my step daughter exactly….!! She portrays herself as the perfect mother….she has always taken great pride in the fact that her child could read by the time she was 3. You could tell that she had pushed this child so hard just to make herself look good. She goes out of her way to make her children look good, only to score points for herself. She knew what a horrible mother her bio Mom was and she is trying way too hard to make people think she is nothing like her….when in reality she is a clone of her bio mom……..her oldest daughter is also just like them. She’s a bully in school, has absolutely NO impulse control, has thrown her baby sister off of a top bunk bed, just because…no body likes even being in the presence of this little girl. It just goes to show the very essence of a female sociopath..She can become exactly what she THINKS others want her to be, and she knows they are watching. It’s like some kind of radar or something. It is so comforting to know you understand their tactics.


One more thing Rosa…..she does the same thing to her husband. She will make little snide remarks about him in front of others, when in fact everyone knows he is the better, more loving parent. I hate when she does that, because the husband just sits back and lets her get away with it……..

Ox Drover

Another article I hadn’t read before! DUH! I may have to go back and start re-reading again….apparently I’ve missed several.

This is a great article, though “guy #4” doesn’t I think get it about WHY she is a P, and seems to think it is from childhood abuse, rather than “genetic+having a p for a mother=P offspring.” But that’s okay, I thinnk he figured out what a psychopath IS and how most of the time they leave a TRAIL behind them of broken lives/relationships etc. Poor kids as well.

Yep, how many times I have seen the old “get preg=meal ticket for me” ploy, but it doesn’t work as well as it used to since divorce became more common.

My own paternal Grandmother pulled that one and gave birth to my psychopathic sperm-donor. Best we can tell her own father was married to at least 4 women and two of them at the same time so he was probably also a P, though I can’t prove it, but with his marital history I would guess he was pretty close if not a “bingo.”

The female versions are pretty toxic, my late husband had a sister that I would class as a psychopath. She gave birth to three daughters that she alternately abandoned and stole back–all three are SCREWED UP big time and their kids as well. Hubby’s sister last seen December 24th, 1984 at his dad’s funeral (her mom had to throw her bodily out for causing a ruckus) last “heard from” with a collect call 10 yrs later and my hubby wouldn’t accept the charges…even her daughters haven’t heard from her since 1984, and she is probably dead by now. I think the last call was from jail but who knows. She was born in 1929 so if she’s alive she’s 80+.



my folks own a number of properties. some in the US, some here. I was signed on to them (so, mom, dad, me on titles) when there was a health scare with my dad and mom a few years ago.

when he sold one of the properties here a couple of years ago, he had to get me to sign some papers allowing him to sell it. he tried at that time to get me to sign a power of attorney – so he could do whatever he wanted with the properties whenever he wanted. he had also included my field in that sale. i refused to sign. made him take the filed off the papers, and signed off on the remaining property.

the filed was given to me – in word, not writing, many years ago, by my now demented mother. she would never ever do anything like this without his permission. it’s a lousy little field not worth much money at all. but i have had to defend it more than once.

this land is not in trust to me. there WAS a trust from my gfather that my father is/was trustee of. it is in default 10 years now. That money invested in a property motrgage that fell apart. it fell apart mostly due to my father’s negligence, and i have some proof of that. I was involved with trying to sort it all out, so have dates and notes regarding it all.

the trust attorney i saw a couple of years ago said i would most likely win (she would work on a %) if i sued him. said it would take about 2 years.

he and i have come to several agreements about the trust – and he has refused to date (although never says he won’t, just doesn’t) to sign any of them. he has ripped me off. quarter of a million. it has taken me a long time to see that. but i do now.

Ox Drover


It sounds like this step daughter makes your life hell on wheels, and I wish I had a way that you could “solve” this that was a “sure fix” but I don’t. I do wish though the best for you and that you can find your peace inside yourself at the very least.

For years I lived in a “battle zone” of a psychopathic war, and I no longer do and it is heaven on earth compared to the war zone. Good luck and God bless you in your quest for peace! (((Hugs))))



Yes, many times the women psychopaths are spousal abusers AND child abusers.

My brother tolerates the same insidious comments, and even allows his wife to alienate him from his own daughter at times.

He has no idea what he’s dealing with.

My mother & I have both tried to tell him, but he refuses to see.


One step, once again, it sounds like your father and mine were cut from a cloth woven of similar thread.

Why didn’t you pursue the deal with the attny? Why not now?

I think I’ve out run my headlights with all this. I am now convinced that my parents, well…now wonder…I am sure beyond doubt that the husbands…

Too Bad all this isn’t available to younger people. What a difference it would have made to me! And others!

Too bad the therapists didn’t call it by name and the internet wasn’t available then.

Does it all overwhlem any one besides me? hAS ANY ONE GOT A TRUFFLE BATCH READY TO EAT-Chocolate is good therapy and you can trust that chocolate is always good…..

See you guys, I’m gonna go bunny hunting….


silver – didn’t do it then because i was still fantasizing that he would come through (on the latest promise, or the next one…), and that i had a ‘family’.

why not now – i have no personal resources (health, stability, emotional) and am too overwhelmed to take on a fight.

but i see potential to get what i want without having to actually sue him. and THAT is more manageable.

Ox Drover

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY GUYS! Problem is, that I have been an April fool, and a May fool, and a June fool, july, august, september, october and November as well as December through March fool as well! They got me in every month of the year for A LONG TIME, but today we can declare ourselves NOBODY’S FOOL! And you know, that is a good place to be!



I have to tell you guys out there……I so feel for everyone of you….I have seen more women s-paths in my own family than men! There is a great book out there for all of you to get…it’s called “Venus, The Dark Side”…by Roy Sheppard. It is geared for the man involved with these women. It validates the man’s situation…it gives real stories of men affected by these evil women…but better yet, it lays out a plan of action to walk you through every step on your way out the door and into freedom. It covers all the bases, from what to prepare for legally, children, money, etc. I beg all of you to get it……women are so evil……and she won’t like it when you decide to take your life back. I have seen my own son-in-law lose his very soul to my s-path step that they have 2 little kids…..those are her pawns to torture this poor guy till the day he dies……one time he almost divorced her and surprise……she got pregnant! It was a trap….please men, don’t be stupid…I am a woman so I know how some of them operate….they will tell you they are on the pill, or they can’t get pregnant…..don’t fall for it…..protect yourself!! If they see you as a meal ticket and easy prey they will latch onto you like the bloodsuckers they are..Then if you do ever manage to get away from her, she will make your future miserable and any other woman you may become involved with….please men, get that book and remember …..all that glitters is not gold !!!!!!

Hope to heal

I just found this post from someone who explains her first realization that she was “different”. It doesn’t sound as if abuse caused her to become a spath.

Here’s a link: (removed per Oxy’s post below re: trolls)

Ox Drover

Dear Hope2heal,

As soon as I saw your link I did NOT CLICK IT….IMHO reading there, unfortunately is sort of like talking to Charlie manson and wanting to know what he thinks about what kind of person he is….NOT MUCH INSIGHT, JUST A LOT OF WORDS.

You might as well ask my P-son for a “take” on why he is what he is—they don’t have the insight to do anything but blow smoke up someone’s ass….I’ll pass.

Ox Drover

ps Hope2, sometimes the trolls from that site come here and try to make trouble on this blog, mock us, call us names, pretend to be “victims” wanting help then attack….

Hope to heal

Dear Oxy ~ I didn’t read any other articles there at all, just the one that the link leads to. I had no idea that those folks caused trouble here. Edited my post above to remove the link.

raggedy ann

Now that’s what I definitely call a troll: someone who presents him or herself falsely purely to cause disomfort or waste another person’s time.

I have looked at that place several times. I would love to be able to read something from that point of view or have a dialogue with someone like that, but I think empaths and spaths are just too alien to each other — and any inability to agree is likely to be attributed to stupidity on the empath’s part. Or weakness. There is definitely some smug sneering at what weak ninnies people unlike them are. I can’t remember if the guy hosting the place was doing a lot of that himself, but when I come accross that stuff it just undermines the credibility of the speaker/commenter and reminds me that I am mostly reading the sophomoric musings of shallow children.

Hope to heal

Dear Raggedy Ann ~ Yep. I think you hit the nail right on the head. They really are like kids that never grew up.

They are educated, and ABLE to care for themselves, but they are too lazy or unwilling to do it, and spend all their time and energy on scheming ways to get others, like us to do it for them. They don’t even know how sad they are. They are truly pathetic.

Ox Drover


You know they would rather work HARD for 10 hours to steal $1 than to do light work for one hour and make an honest $10….

Hope to heal

Oxy ~ my husband agrees with you completely. He had many years of experience with exSpath showing exactly that type of behavior! With the goal in the end, to get as much as she can. (She’s still trying) Not too successfully with us anymore 🙂

Ox Drover

Dear Hope2,

The sense of entitlement and I actually think the GLEE that sometimes some of them get from “pulling a fast one” makes the stolen fruit sweeter.

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