Millions of sociopaths roam the planet. They inhabit all segments of the population. They are male, female, rich, poor, old, young, all races, all religions, all education levels, all demographic groups. Most of them are not in prison, so they move freely among us, living their lives by exploiting others.
Many take pride in their ability to manipulate others. Some who are criminals view crime as fun. They see nothing wrong with their behavior. As long as they keep succeeding, sociopaths will continue to behave the way they do.
So how do we make them fail?
Sociopaths only want to win, so failure is losing. Failure is not being able to exploit others, or at least not being able to get away with exploiting others.
I see four steps to shutting them down, and they all revolve around education.
1. Educating the public about sociopaths. This is the first step. So many Lovefraud readers who have tangled with sociopaths have told me, “I didn’t know these people existed!” Yes, they exist. Sociopaths live among us. And they are dangerous to our mental, emotional, psychological, financial, sexual and physical health.
This is why I launched Lovefraud. This is why I’m embarking on the Lovefraud Education Program to teach high school and college students about sociopaths. (If you’re in a position to bring the program to your school, please contact terry@anderlypublishing.com.) And there are so many more people who need to be educated, including therapists, lawyers and judges. We all need to know the warning signs of sociopathic behavior, so that if we see them, we can respond appropriately—especially by running away.
2. Exposing known sociopaths. This, I believe, is the only strategy that really works against sociopaths. We can’t count on winning judgments against them and actually collecting our money. We can’t count on them being prosecuted or locked up. Sometimes the only way to keep them from harming others is to blow their cover.
We do need to be cautious about this, as I explained in a previous article, Exposing the sociopath. Many of you may not be able to skewer your exes publicly, as I did with James Montgomery. But you may be able to quietly speak your truth in your community, profession, church or wherever you know the predator is trolling for new victims. In the future, a few words of warning, coupled with growing public awareness of the disorder, may be enough.
3. Stop breeding sociopaths. Sociopaths are hard-wired for sex. They have a lot of sexual magnetism, and many Lovefraud readers have said that sex with the sociopath was the best they’ve ever had. But a consequence of sex, of course, is children. And because sociopathy is a highly genetic disorder, children born of sociopaths are at risk of inheriting a predisposition for the disorder.
One of the big things I hope will be accomplished through the Lovefraud High School Education program is to help young people understand that romantic relationships with sociopaths lead to nothing but trouble. If more people refuse to get involved with sociopaths, that will mean fewer at-risk children.
4. Appropriate parenting for at-risk children. Although sociopathy is highly genetic, inheriting the genes doesn’t necessarily mean that every at-risk child will grow up to be a sociopath. It is the interaction of genetics and the environment, including parenting, which actually creates the disordered individuals.
Many people realize, after a child is conceived or born, that their partner is a sociopath. If this is you, you need to take steps to raise the child so that he or she does not develop this disorder. I realize that this is immensely difficult and complicated, especially when the sociopathic parent will not let go of the child, which is often the case. But the healthy parents should try, as best they can, to teach the child how to love and feel empathy. (For information on how to do this, read Just Like His Father? by Dr. Liane Leedom.)
Perhaps with education, perseverance and time, our descendants will see the end of sociopathy. And they’ll thank us for taking the first steps to hasten the demise.
I’ll bring the moonshine!
Thank You for your message KatyDid, that is a good idea about writing an eulogy (sp) about Harley. He has had an interesting life. I had a friend (W) who just loved my dachshund Willie. So W went and bought Harley and he was a terror on four short legs, chewed up all W’s exspensive antigues, peeed and pooped on W’s exspensive oriental rugs, chased car’s down the road, he would crawl under the fence and steal the neighbors kids toys…W would bring him to my house ( the farm ) and he and Willie would run and play and swim in the pond, he never peed on anything of mine…One time when W was coming to the farm Harley jumped out the car window when W turned down my country road he was so excited to get here FASTER~!~ Harley was just not meant to be a city dog, he never wanted to go home when W left..So W would let Harley spend weekends with me and I would take him back to the city and Harley grieved for me when I would leave….When Harley was bout one W started getting dementia and I would go over there and find Harley sitting on the front porch looking so sad, W would even forget he had him..Well I took Harley home and W would ask me to bring his dog back – well I did a few time but finally I told W he was at the vet’s etc..anyway I kinda stole Harley…W went into nursing home and died a few years later…Harley has been forever grateful to me for rescuing him from city life…..anyway when I buried him today I looked up and said OK William you take care of Harley now….
This computer screen is so F’d up that I can’t move the screen over so I can scroll down. It’s a chance happening if I get it right.
My son had another sleep-over. The boys are still gone. It’s past 10:30 PM
I am flipping mad, and worried!!!
I called that neighbor’s kids dad and got his voice mail. I left a message that the boys are not here; are they there? I am worried.
I notice my son is not brave enough to wander the neighborhood when he doesn’t have his toady along.
Get rid of the toady.
let the toady dad know I don’t have control over this sleep over, they pulled a fast one! and his kid is out after curfew
that’s a beautiful story hens. stolen and loved.
glad he’s resting in such a beautiful spot at home…
Now it is almost 11:00 pm. I am so worried. I gotta calm down
He just came home at 11:15
i am so happy to see them that I didn’t kill them
I am laughing.
My son and his friend got back at 11:15. That part is not funny.
But what is funny is Allen’s dad called a few minutes after the boys got back here. He asked Allen if he was drinking and getting laid. I exploded in laughter when I heard Allen say “no dad, I wasn’t drinking or getting laid”.
His dad doesn’t know him. Allen has problems with girls. I know cause Allen follows me around when he talks to a girl on the cell. I can’t shake him off. And, he doesn’t drink. He makes kool-aid to drink when he stays here.
I know my son wasn’t out with girls, and he doesn’t drink.
The one thing I worry about is a older women thinking she is going to get a cougar thing going with these young boys.
((((Hens))))
there is nothing like a pet to make sense of the world for us.
you rescued him, he rescued you. and it will continue for eternity. there is no end, God provides the rescuer forever.
jeanine – glad all are safe….and grounded?